He tried to kill himself again. Needs more mental help than he already has.

Question

Friend tried to kill himself again?

The past few weeks have been horrible for three of my best friends. First, one of them was badly injured protecting our country over in Iraq, but fortunately he is doing fine at home. Next, my other friend lost 3 fingers, which the other four of us take responsibility for. The last tragedy is another one of my friend attempting suicide again a few days ago. He has been struggling with bipolar disorder his whole life. I know he has been taking his medicine because we meet for breakfast every day so I can be sure he's taking his bipolar medicine and he knows that I'm taking my depression meds. He has tried killing himself four times now, this one being the worst. He has long, deep cuts all over his body from a really thin, sharp kitchen knife. It's like the kind chefs use. He also shot himself in the head, but miraculously it was not fatal for my little angel. I think it may have to do with the fact that he lived in an orphanage for years, and found out his parents had died when he was young. He was so excited to find them. He lived with them in his mom's home country of Japan until they died. Can you imagine living without any family for 21 years? Anyways, he's awake in the ICU of the hospital right now. His doctor said he will have short-term memory damage and the some of the tendons in his fingers are totally shredded and ruined, which sucks because he was the smartest person I know and the best drummer I have ever heard.

I know I'm totally getting a helper monkey because the war hero friend is in a wheelchair, the seven fingered-friend needs a lot of help opening things, and now my other friend is going to need a lot of help.

What else can my friends and I do for him?

I know he needs to feel loved the way he is. After we found him in his pathetic state, I could not stop myself from cradling him in my arms like a young child. I find myself unable to wash my clothes that are now covered in his blood.

Please don't call him a sinner for doing what he did. I believe that people suffering from mental illness do go back to God, and he's such a sweet little angel that there is no way he could go to h**l.

Again, the question is how to help him with everything when he comes home on the 9th and make him know he is loved. Thank you so much.

Answer 1

hold onto him for dear life. Don't let him go. One of my childhood friends had commited suicide a couple years ago...what a horrible thing to go through. Make a list of all the things you love about him. Write down what you and others would do without him. Make these extreme answers, because the point is to make him responsible for you, and others. Make him a top priority, even if he doesn't appreciate it. It's very important.

Answer 2

This isn't an easy thing to say, nor to hear.

As much as you desire to keep your friend safe, give him a will to live, and a life to live for,

Only he can do that for himself.  What he does with his life is ultimately up to him alone, and not the fault of any one else, whether it be good or bad.

At the hospital, you can request for the Hospital Chaplain ( a minister) to visit your friend - talk with him - pray with him.  If and when your friend reaches a point of wanting to live, it will probably come from his reaching out to God for meaning in his life.

You say he will be released from the hospital on the 9th....before his release, I would question the hospital social worker if he has received psychiatric care while physically recuperating from his self-inflicted injuries.      Chances are, your friend needs to spend time in the psych ward, until he is stable.   He has reasons why he doesn't want to live, and it is oh, so important for him to face those while in a safe place.

It is no mistake to let him know you are his friend through thick and thin.   It may be a mistake to "take care of him" because he needs to find his own reason to stay alive and full of life and dreams and goals.

In many communities there are opportunities for (not the right word, but the closest I can think of at the moment) daycare where the mental health patient goes each day and is a participant in like a class or group until he becomes stable and is able to handle his own life, and make his own decisions, and is able to work and support himself.

You may want to spend your life with him, but for right now, that may not be the wisest thing.  He needs to become stable first, and he needs serious therapy with a psychologist, and he needs spiritual support.   True a friend can make a difference, but be careful to not be making decisions for him.  He's got to do this for himself.

This is all so sad.  It would be a positive thing for you to reach out to other people in your life right now, while he is struggling to re-connect with life.

Answer 3

You can't shoot yourself in the head and not die, unless she shot himself with a pellet gun or something like that..and you cannot "attempt" suicide, people that "attempt" suicide are just afraid of death but want attention..

Answer 4

Woah...that's serious sh*t right there.

...He needs to come home to a loving, welcoming environment (discuss the fact that he tried to off himself again later).  You need more help since your friends need help.  And your suicidal friend needs to be put on some serious suicidal watch.  At this rate, he's going to succeed soon.  Watch his *ss like a hawk.

Answer 5

Stand beside him come what may.  There is a dear church friend of mine that was shot in the head almost point blank with a shotgun by someone else and by the grace of God he survived!  So, yes, you can be shot in the head and live.