He wants to get married and I don't-how do I delay this wedding?

Question

We have dated for 4 yrs, lived together for 3. He recently got a job in another state and moved out. Before doing so, he proposed and I accepted. When I did so, I had no idea how eager he was to get married. He is OK with the fact that we live in diff states. We both have good jobs and have no plans of quitting anytime soon. I love him dearly, but I am hesitant to get married and have a long distance relationship. According to him, its just a matter of time when we will be together. I plan to go to school full time for 2 years- which will increase our distances. The main reason he wants to get married asap is to stop the nagging of his parents. We both are Indian and our parents are quite traditional. Everyone seems to be planning my wedding - which apparently is next year. I love him and would like to be with him, but only when things are a bit settled between us. I don't want a long distance relationship and there is no way I'm not going to go to school to be with him.

Answer 1

Don't get married until YOU are ready.  Don't let anyone pressure into marriage - it is for a lifetime (hopefully) so, unless you have a terminal illness, what's the hurry?

Answer 2

You Want to marry him but only on your terms and conditions. Marriage is about sacrifice, compromise and trust. Sit down and talk to him what you want. Come to a compromise and don't just think I, ME , MYSELF.

Answer 3

be honest

Answer 4

If you don't plan on anything changing between you, why are you so worried?  Is it the marriage or the life commitment you are afraid of?

If neither or you plan on seeing anyone else, I don't see a problem with it.

Answer 5

long distance relationship don't work out, don't take a step that you are not sure about...

Answer 6

Talked straight forward with him and let him know how you feel!

Answer 7

Don't rush into anything you're not ready to yet. A marriage is made up of 2 people. Just be honest with him and tell him that you need more time. :)

Answer 8

I think you answered your own question at the end. Good luck.

Answer 9

It would make sense to wait until you have things settled school and career wise. He needs to stand up to his parents and not let them pressure him or you to get married before you are both ready. Best of Luck.

Answer 10

You should not have accepted his proposal if you did not plan to marry. Give him the ring back and live your life until you are out of school.

Answer 11

you cant marry someone and not live in the same house, let along the same state!

And you cant marry someone just to shut up thier parents!

Answer 12

You need to do what your heart tells you to do.  If you have any hesitations about marrying this man, then your answer is no.  That does not mean that later you will not have hesitations and if it is meant to be, it will be.  But no one should get married if they are hesitant.  Marriage  is something you KNOW you want to do or KNOW you do not want to do.

Answer 13

tell him that mabe we should take some time. ( thora time wait  karo, me thore busy hu ach kal

Answer 14

Set the date for  2010.

Good luck

Answer 15

Only the truth will do. Anything else and you will end up hating yourself and your "better" half. His nagging parents better not be the reason for getting married!   Leave the parents and circumstances out of this. Either you want to have a life together or not.

Everything comes at a price.  This time around you need to share the costs and see if this is at all possible.

Answer 16

Tell him that you need to lose some weight for the dress you want

Answer 17

Tell him about ur future plans.... if he loves u...h would surely accept this.