Help?! How can some people be so confident and talkative, and others be quiet and reserved?

Question

I don't consider myself to be an introvert, but I have a hard time making conversation or saying thank you to people (even family) in a way that they think I'm sincere. What do I do? I want more friends and I want to keep the few I have by being more interesting. I want to be one of those girls other girls and boys can always talk to and mess around with, but I'm just boring old me. What do I do? I'm a Sophmore in high school, so I still have time.

Answer 1

Most people do not realize that confidence (and most other good social qualities) are things we learn, not things we are born with.  When I read your question, it sounds to me as if you are trying to "be" somebody other than yourself, because you have not recognized the good qualities you already have.  Do you want other people to like you for who you are, and want to be friends with the real "you," or do you want them to like some imaginary person you pretend to be?  First, spend your time with people who are interested in the same things you are, and talking about them will automatically follow.  Join clubs, service groups, or whatever you can find that will put you together with others who like the games, music, entertainment, classes, or other things you like.  Second, focus on other people, and don't worry about how you are coming across or what image you are projecting.  If you are interested in them, they will be interested in you, and at the same time you won't be becoming a "fake."  Third, stop thinking of yourself as boring.  You are boring to you, because you are with you all the time.  Somebody who isn't with you 24 hours a day will be very interested to hear your opinions, your ideas, your hopes, and your thoughts.  

Answer 2

You have to push yourself. Make it a game. To see how many people you can talk to in one hour that you usually never talk to. It's actually fun. Don't lower your standards for others, but be there to help. I say, rehearse before you go to bed or wake up or sometime, interesting things or questions to ask or say. Like "What color is your toothbrush?" lol. And have confidence. You can do it!

Answer 3

You should be yourself. Changes take time, and experience.