Help! I'm not a social butterfly...........?

Question

I hate parties. Really. I am very uncomfortable talking and making small talk. I usually end up saying something stupid, like the truth, or answer a question with either a dumb answer or my mind goes blank. I'm much better if I am just talking one on one to someone I actually know. Not going is not an option.

Can anyone help?

Answer 1

I am the EXACT same way so I know how hard it is. Just try REALLY hard to be yourself. Go with a friend who is a little more talkative and hang out together if possible so that you are not the focus of the conversation. then, when you do have to do the small talk and all of that, they can talk and you can jump in when you feel comfortable. just try to be yourself. if you can't go with a friend who is more social, go with one who is shy as well and just hang out together and try to stay away from the conversation and if you absolutely have to make conversation, you can help each other out. good luck!

Answer 2

That sounds like me. My smalltalk used to consist of: "soooooooooo....." aka lots of awkwardness.

But one day i thought of smalltalk in advance. I thought of things that are always usefull in conversations, like current issues or (if  i knew the persons hobbies) tv shows or whatever. I memorized the subjects and the next time i talked to people i made sure i knew a different topic even before the other one has ended, to prevent the silences. I've done this for a while, and now i don't even have to think of it in advance anymore. I can make smalltalk with people, comment about how they look, theyir pets, their house, their family, etcetera, etcetera.

Still I prefer not to lol. I still don't like the whole smalltalk and acting all interested and trying to be all interesting. I rather stick to the people i know, then meeting new people. Boring, lame, i know. but oh well :)

Answer 3

Well... it's all about confidence.  And i know how you feel.  But i think what would help you is go with a good friend and both of you hang out and talk to other people. You'll find people who you will talk to and get to meet.  Try practicing by yourself because that what's helps me.  Also just be yourself and don't act somebody your not.  Good luck!  =)

Answer 4

im the same exact way

i think it helps to smile alot and look confident.

its best to steer the conversation towards something you know alot about or something your interested in so theres less of a chance that youll look stupid.

sometimes when i say something stupid or draw a blank when asked a question i pretend to be distracted or have a headache or something along those lines so people might think that was the reason for my dumb behavior and dont think im too weird.

but maybe thats just me...?

Answer 5

just be yourself do what makes you happy not everyone likes parties or maybee its just the type of parties you've been going to. or you cud just throw a party yourself so you will be in controll and invite the kindof people you want to get to know.

Answer 6

What I do is make sure that I have a group of friends, and somebody more outgoing than myself, so that I can "catch" their energy. After awhile I forget that I'm in a room full of strangers and everything's all good.