Help!! My 11 yr old is out of control?

Question

My 11 year old daughter is out of control. She beats up her younger brother and sister, yells and screams at me an my husband (her stepfather), swears, throws things, I keep having to leave work early to come home.

I have done everything, taken away all of her privliges, grounded her to her room for as long as it takes for her to behave again. Till the next time.

What can I do to deal with her?? Someone help

Answer 1

SPANK HER!!!!!!!!!!

Answer 2

Drugs.  She's doing drugs.  You need to have her drug tested.  You can pick up drug tests at any large pharmacy.

Answer 3

apparently you did NOT raise her right. did you spoil her when she was younger? you need to show her YOU are the boss. she needs to understand that YOU are the only one who can yell and punish. and that SHE needs to respect you because you are the reason she doesnt live on the streets! maybe its puberty hormones and all that c**p, but you know it is a little too extreme for that. good luck! if all else fails, SUPERNANNY!!!

Answer 4

If your 11 year old daughter is calling your husband a pervert and a child abuser shouldn't that raise a red flag with you? Often girls get raped by step dad and start acting out. Have a heart to heart with her and ask her why she is so angry. Then seek professional help.

*I don't mean girls OFTEN get raped by step dads, I mean that if a girl is raped by a step dad they often act out. Sorry about the wording

Answer 5

HAppily acept her anger at some moments but do not use cussing and u may could give a spnking which sure teaches me a lesson but also i had the same problems and m momo took me to a counselrer and i am now fine because a counsele is someone that all ur feelings are safe with u know just give it a try

Answer 6

SUpernannyyyyyy

Answer 7

Maybe she's upset about something in her life try TALKING to her and asking her about her problems that might need to be discussed. And be sure not to act harsh!!

Answer 8

You need to consult with your family physician and/or pediatrician.  He/she will help explore all possible alternatives, including outpatient therapy, in-home sevices and programs, inpatient treatment, and medication.  I know that you feel as if you have tried everything, but truth be told there are all sorts of other options that I am guessing you are not even aware of.  I work in the mental health field with children, and have done so for the last 15 years.  If not for that, I would probably have no idea of these services.  Like I said, consult with your family's physician first.

Answer 9

There is no easy answer to this question.However I was your daughter when I was younger and I can tell you from that perspective that the main thing I lacked was love.Sure my parents said the words,but still to this day my family shows no affection.Im not saying you dont love your kid,Im saying she perceives that you dont.Second all kids need special time with parent(s)Just for them.Obviously there is some kind of anger issue,I would reccomend talking to her,in a nice way,dont accuse or say anything that will start a fight,ask what she needs from you that shes not getting,and even if she flies into a rage over this,dont react,that will end the conversation to her and will make it worse.I think punishing kids in many cases makes the problem worse,it may work for a day or 2 but ultimately they will do whatever it is again,due to whatever the underlying problem is.sometimes punishment is appropriate,but if you wish to stop repeats of the behavior you have to find out its cause.It may be as simple as what I said,it may be a chemical imbalance,it may even be mental illness,in any of these cases punishment wont fix it for very long.I will turn on the ability to email me if youd like to talk further,if I can figure out how to do that.I raised 4 children,3 of whom werent mine and had various degrees of acting out.They have all turned out to be pretty decent adults,not that they havent had their problems,but it could have been much worse.

Answer 10

Do you have a belt? If you do I suggest you put it across her *** the next time she throws something at you, cusses or hits any of her siblings.

Answer 11

OMG ~ I can't believe what some of these people are advising you to do.  I would start by getting her tested for food allergies.  Seriously, as crazy as it may sound, it sounds as if something is triggering her to go into a rage.  Especially if your other children are fine.  Walnuts, bananas, food coloring, other nuts, etc are KNOWN to cause this type of behavior and it can be very serious for some.  Get her help before she gets hurt or hurts someone else.  And please, don't call the cops ~ it's your daughter and you don't want her locked up.  Start a food log and keep track of what she eats ~ you'll find very quickly what foods trigger certain behaviors. Search the web for more info.

Answer 12

Smack her in the face one time... real hard.

That will scare the c**p out of her.. lol

She acts out b/c you gave her a bit 2 much freedom.

&& the whole "rape" comment up there was just so retarded... if she called her mother a w***e, does it mean that her mother is  a w***e?

Answer 13

Well, I just turned 12, but if you yells at you, you can hit her. Or you can find out whats bothering her to cause all this. Because when I go insane theres ALWAYS a reason. Like kids at school, stress, or any of that stuff. Good luck!

Answer 14

you should get advice from a cop.

Answer 15

ok well

1. she mite just be crazy

2. sit down and talk with her

3. next time she has a fit warn her and if she continues slap her across the face once [ thats not abuse if she deserves it ]

she 'll get the picture eventually.

4. grounding does nothing. trust me i know this from experience. it just teaches kids to be more sneaky

5.take her to a doctor

6. her next fit just sit there and smile at her it'll make her mad

be like ya know wat little girl look at urself. i thought u were almost a teenager so act like one.

7. u mite take her rape accusation more seriously

HOPE I HELPED YAA!!!! goodluck

Answer 16

if she hits u grab her by her hair n curse her out if she gets disrespectful then u let her run off n get a belt follow her n beat her *** n dont apologive take evry thing away n threaten her

Answer 17

Take her to a psychologist. She has a problem bigger than you.   Also, maybe the younger siblings should be at a babysitters when you are not home away from the 11 year old.

Answer 18

my mom used to beat me up , you know what thank god she did, because that taught to respect my self and act more like a man, I am not telling to beat your daughter to death , but you need to kick her *** and show her what you can do. when things get out of hands, sometimes beating up helps.

Answer 19

How do you know she is not being molested? Your not with her 24/7, so don't sit there and say for sure what has or hasn't happened. She is showing clear signs of being abused such as acting out with anger, and admitting she's being abused. Try sitting her down and listen to HER side of the story, chances are she's telling the truth, most kids don't make those kind of things up. You need to decide who's more important your husband or your daughter.

Answer 20

You need to smack her hard, real hard, until she stops. If she doesn't, I'd advise you to go see a doctor. She may have a mental issue, I see this kinda thing all the time.

Answer 21

You could spank her with a plastic hanger. But not to hard. You could do it on the hand, because it would sting more. Or the bottom. I wouldn't ground them, because that would make them madder.

Answer 22

Beat her ***

Answer 23

Hows she doing in school?  Do you think she might have ADD?  My friends daughter acted in a similar manner.  The daughter is on adderall now and she is like a whole new kid.  Go to your pediatrician and ask for advice.  Best of luck.

Answer 24

Anger management courses?