Help consoling some who tried to commit suicide?

Question

My friend is bipolar and recently tried to commit suicide, she was taken to a hospital and thankfully saved. It has been several days and I can visit her now if i want to. I haven't seen her since before the incident and i want to help her feel better. Part of me is afraid i may come on too strong or too harsh, but she also hates the way I am sometimes overprotective and lie just to make her feel better. I just want to visit her and make her feel better, how should I approach her and how should I act? I dont want her to feel pitied, or alone. Hopefully someone can respond who has had experience in this type of situation

Answer 1

I've been in the same boat as your friend. Do not- DO NOT take this as your personal mission to "save" your friend. Do not call him/her selfish, do not guilt them, do not say you get it/understand, do not be afraid to look them in the eyes, do not be afraid to cry or hold back, but DO NOT blubber all over them.

Its best to be alone with them if you can and say

- how you feel about them (just state the facts dont start saying things like "i love you more than life itself! more than the sun! dont do this again etc etc")

- how you would be for the rest of your life if he succeded in his/her suicide (dont exaggerate, just do it in a matter-of-fact kind of way)

- tell them you don't want them to do it again

- tell them your not going to treat them differently, but it will be impossible for you to not think about them/worry from time to time

dont turn on the water works. dont make yourself cry but at the same time dont hold back tears. its an emotional situation so its ok to be human, but let everything come naturally. dont push it and dont hold it back.

and most importantly do not lie. please please do not lie. even if it will hurt them. he/she will know if you are lying. trust me on this

Answer 2

Suicidal is never an option. There is pain involved and suffering before you can end your life. No point doing that. There is no end to it! You leave nothing but shameful act.

Answer 3

If she hates your lies, then stop. Remember, "if you haven't gotten anything nice to say, don't say anything at all." Sure you don't want to hurt her with your honesty, but you don't want to her with your lies either do you? Also remember to always think before you act of say anything (Important!).

If you don't want her to feel pitied, then don't pity her. Sympathize with her, but don't tell her things like, "I understand" or "I've been there." That's a big no-no. Sad or depressed people will never agree that you understand. Even if you went through the same exact situation, could you? Every person is different, including their thoughts and emotions. And it's not about you, right? In this situation, it's about your friend -- all about your friend. Remember that! There is another time and place for those problems of yours, assuming you have any.

Feelings of loneliness can't always be helped. Sometimes a person can't be alone in a crowd. Just be there for her, and let her know that. "I'm just a phone call away" can mean so much, so let her know and remind her... that you're there for her. And by remind, I don't mean keep saying it. I mean, by the little things like visits or a "get well" card. The little things are what matter.

It helps to talk about other things, just to get her mind off of things. Talk about things as you normally would (with caution). Maybe get to know her better than you already do. It's nice to give her a chance for some spotlight attention.

I answered a similar question on the other account, with some important points that might help. Check it out (It's the best answer):

http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index?...