Help in-law problem?

Question

my sister in law always in messed up relationships so whenever they get rocky or end she stays at our house. she eats our food sleeps on our couch..even when my husband goes to work she will climb into my bed with me complaining that my couch is uncomfortable. last night she was telling my husband to shut up over and over. i finally had enough i told her he can do whatever he wants cuz its his house. when i asked her how long she was staying she replied i can come to my brothers house whenever i want...she started screaming and then eventually left. she has her mom and dad close by...i dont know why she chooses to come to our house. im thinking that even when this blows over i should just ignore her becuz she always meddles her way back in. shes kinda center of attention type of deal---sometimes it comes between me and my husband because the sister will run to her mommy and her other sis and then they all talk about me and essentially hate me...any advise besides ignore her. please help..oh yea his mom, dad and the other sister live in the same apt complex...so it can get pretty bad when you have to see them all the time. i wish we could move but thats not an option right now.

Answer 1

Sounds like your hubby needs to grow a couple and step in...

Answer 2

You need to have a discussion with your husband.  Does he share the same feelings as you?  He needs to be the one to tell her she is welcome for a friendly visit anytime, but extended stays are out of the question.  You need to keep the peace and smile and be nice so that they have nothing to say about you.  It is your husband's family and his responsibility to be the one to talk to her.  You would do the same if it were your sister.

Answer 3

The most important thing is that if you and your husband have a good marriage then nobody else matters.  If she left and doesn't talk to you anymore who cares?  You might be better off and if the rest of his family does not like you, that doesn't matter either as long as your husband does and backs you up.  They need to respect his life and if they don't bring anything positive to your relationship then you don't need them.  I think you defending your husband was the right thing to do, don't let them mess with your relationship.  Speak up when you don't like something because when you try to be nice and are scared to hurt people's feelings they will walk all over you.  I've learned from many times of letting family live with us that they will never appreciate it and they always leave mad at you so it is a lot easier to just not let them in the house from the start...it may be difficult to say it but believe me it is easier in the long run and you will save yourself the misery of living with them.  You can also charge them rent and make it high enough so that they don't want to move in.  They just want a free ride.

Answer 4

Your husband needs to deal with this. Tell him you can't put up with it anymore. Him, not her.