Help me find a short funny monologue for a teenage girl?

Question

please help me find a short funny monologue for a young girl that is under 30 seconds!! i know this is very detail,but i have a huge interview and i really need your help!!

i need answers fast!!

Answer 1

"Bandana Mania" (Teen Monologue, Female)*Humorous*

Jayna's new friend Stephanie, has just moved in next door. Jayna has been going to the same inner-city high school all her life, while Stephanie came from a nice, quiet, middle class neighborhood on the outside of town. Stephanie's a nice girl, her parents just divorced, lives with her mom. They lost there house and are renting a little studio place above the neighbor's garage. Jayna is giving her friend some fashion tips for her first day of school.

Jayna: Stephanie, are you crazy! You can't wear that around here...Where do you think you are, the "St. Mary's School for Girls", cutie, you're downtown now. You can't wear that bandana around your ankle, like some little fashion accessory! You'll get us both killed! (Beat) Yeah it looks great...but sorry...you're not wearing it. You'll see a lot fo kids around here wearing bandanas on their heads and it's not because it goes with their shirt. They are like signs of association and sources of pride, or somehting like that...oh, and good luck if you DON'T happen to be familiar with, "The Code". Oh man, and heaven forbid you put a wrong color on, or wear it because it's cute...you could get yourself messed-up! Yesterday, I thought I'd have a little fun and wear that bandana my little brother gave me, with the good ole Red, White, and Blue, United States Flag printed on it...You should have seen the looks on their faces, they didn't know whether to throw me a peace sign or beat me up...but you can forget about it, I'm not wearing enough under arm deodorant to try that stunt again today, so please, just take it off!

"Confused Teen" (Teen Monologue, Female) *Humorous*

Both Angie and Harmony are in their early teens. Angie's going through some physical changes, inside and out, and like any other good teenager, can't associate these changes with life's little obstacles.

Angie: What's going on Harmony? I don't get it, why is it when you become a teenager everything gets so confusing? I mean, what are they doing, spiking the make-up? Is there some unwritten law that when you become a teenager you move into the realm of insanity? If I remember correctly, that's about the time everything started getting nutty. Think about it...I'm supposed to wash my face BEFORE I exercise to prevent build-up. No, I'm supposed to wash my face AFTER I exercise to prevent break-outs. I'm NOT SUPPOSED to eat chocolate because it causes pimples. Wait, I'm SUPPOSED to eat chocolate before I take a test, because it's great, "brain food." I'm SUPPOSED to have lots of foods hat are rich in iron to help my circulation. Hold on, now, I'm NOT SUPPOSED to have a lot of iron because it prevents my body from absorbing calcium properly. Wow, if I can survive being a confused teenager, I think I can pretty much survive anything! (Change of heart) Let's get out of here, I'm hungry!

hope these two helped