Question:

Help me get along with my mother!?

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okay, so my parents are divorced. and even though they are, my father is my mother's ex husband, he is being the best ex husband, by still supporting her, financially. so, i'm 14, and i have a younger sister who's 12. basically, my father raised me. and, my mother raised my sister. so, i'm the sister who doesn't cry over stupid things and i'm more independent than my sister is. my mother may be bi polar & schizophrenic, but, my sister doesn't need to act like a baby all around her. and, since it's the summer, my father suggested that i spend it with my mother. so, now, that i'm with my mother, she ALWAYS takes my sister side, when we are in argument. like, she's such a baby around her. and, i'm always left standing. i tend to yell more then cry. i never let out my emotions, because my mother put me through so much pain in middle school. i have an incredible about of anger towards her. she really hurt me. like, my father told me that when i was younger, when my doctor told me that i had to get surgery, my mother left to washington to see her sister. like, she didn't even care that i was five years old and in pain. and, i got really sick when i was five. it took a while for me to recover from pneumonia. and, especially in middle school, i needed her. and she wasn't there.

what can i do? i know most of you are going to say "go to therepy." well, i'm going to be a freshman the private high school that i've dreamed of attended. and, i'm not going to let her ruin it. and i dont have the time. during the school, i'm not going to see her as much. do we just need time apart?

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  1. I think you need time apart from each other and you should try a little harder cuz i mean that iz your mom ,but just try not to get into arguments with her or your sister cuz you are just gonna get yelled at either way . Just sit down talk 2 her and tell her how u feel and if that doesn't work then maybe you can just tell your dad u just want to live with him and talk to your mom on the phone or just see her occasionally


  2. I think you should tell her that she hurt you and it's hard  for you. If she continues to act wierd towards you, I think that you and her should take some time apart. Maybe she's pretty used to your sister that she doesn't know how to act towards you.

  3. I'm very very sorry for you. But sometimes even families don't belong with eachother.

  4. I have been in your shoes for 21 years and I can only say what I do to help myself. You have to trust someone other than your mother to cry on their shoulder and let out your pain to them. No therepy probley will not work it never worked for me. But the best thing you can do is isolate arguments with her. Just agree with her that you are the one wrong even though you know you are not. And you cant live with someone you cant get along with. I understand your mom has hurt you but you have to let go of the pain inside you. It is not safe for you to hold on the the past for yourself. Just let her be her and you be yourself. Ignore her negativity and just agree with her and shrug it off your own shoulders. Find a close friend to lean on. Your mom is going to be your mom you will never be able to change her so just go with the flow. Its not an easy road but know someone has to be the adult and evidently she wont be so you just have to learn to blow it off yourself. Still see her and talk to her but dont feed into her negativity and dont get mad at it. Just laugh and move on knowing you have your own life to live. But a close friend will help more than you know

  5. if u realli dnt get along...den i guess its better if u jst live wit ur dad. u can try talking 2 her and letting her noe how u feel. but if dat doesnt wrk, den i dnt think ders anything else 2 do.

  6. you should explain the situation to her. maybe you can work it out

  7. wow, that sounds really tough. the best thing to do is just talk to her about the way you are feeling. make sure you really express yourself, even if it brings you to tears. you have to let her know exactly how you're feeling and make her understant that you need her in your life to be there for here. no matter what you have to be there for her not only because of her sickness but because she is your mother and she needs you. she might not express herself the way she wants to because she isnt use to you. as you said she raised your sister and you were raised by your dad. of course she would pick up for your younger sister based on what you said. i know its hard but you have to try to make the best out of it.....good luck sweetie and be strong

  8. I think this may be hard for you.

    But some time apart will do you both good.

    It'll make her realise how much she needs and loves you.

    And should repair your relationship.

    Is your sister your dad's kid too?

    He could talk to her about how she acts

    with your Mom, and the fights.


  9. I'm very sorry to hear that..

    Maybe you made something when you where little and she cant forget it.. or just that she didnt see you for long.. and didnt want anything from her ex husband..

    Mine please

    http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index;...

    oo.. Aysha.. Nice name.. my name is Aysha.. so is my cousin.. =)

  10. wow, that sucks you just really need to talk to her. Show her this for example, or write her letter. I know it's hard but no matter what she is your mother.

    Hope this helps!

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