Help me please, my husband has a hard time with our baby.?

Question

My husband has a hard time with our 6month old lil girl. She's gets so fussy with him pretty much all the time.She knows who he is she responds to him as a child does to there dad (when there 6month old). She will be okay and a happy child when he has her sometimes. I don't know what to do he gets so upset cuz she spits up all the time and she cries and cries(not colic confirmed with doctor), She just doesn't give him a break no one else really has a hard time with her. He gets in such a bad mood when she gets like that. I hate coming home when he has had a hard day like that. I try helping him saying do this and try something different, or do what I do and all he says is I did I did I did well you must not be doing it the right way cuz she ain't liken it to much so shut up and do how I say she'll stop crying. Then when I show him how I do it he gets pissed saying you never told me and the same **** that every woman deal with.the normal"I told you,you just don't listen" It's his birthday today which makes this day even harder he can't enjoy some time to relax I know having a baby is hard work but I find it so much d**n easier then he makes it all out to be. What can I do to help him. Why does she always have a hard day with him? Oh he loves her to death he is his world but he has a lil bit of a short string when he can't calm her down or he doesn't ever know what to do.He is a great dad honest he just has a hard time with her. Help has any other woman had a hard time with this and what did you do, does it get better.

Answer 1

I hope this helps.  This is coming from a father.  Your husband should interact with his child in his own way, a child reacts differently to a father than a mother and the father should interact with the baby in a way that shows the baby those differences.  

What worked for me was a lot of eye contact with my daughter, holding her gently with my thumb near her sternum, and the palm of my hand and my fingers on her back, so she could feel the differences between my hand and her mother's hand -i .e. larger, stronger, etc.  When I held her I also held her against my chest and I would sing songs to her that highlight a deeper masculine voice.  I think these were all ways that emphasized that "Yes I am not mommy, but I am different and that is special too."  I have done the same thing with my sister's baby and he calms down right away too.   I really hope this helps.  I would suggest your husband try different things to find a good way to interact with his daughter and be careful what emotion he shows on his face; a calm look on a parent's face = a calm baby.  Good Luck.

Answer 2

Your husband needs to try relaxing more with the baby. It sounds like he's tensed up and the baby can feel it. Have him take the baby out in a stroller for walks. He'll begin to feel more comfortable with her and make more of a connection with her. It sounds like he's pretty immature, though.

Answer 3

My little girl is 4 and a half months old and in the first month she seemed really fussy around her Dad, but then I started making sure that they had pleasant time together, without the fussing. If she was happy I'd hurry and hand her to him so they could spend some happy time together. I think that's worked to be honest. If she's ornery and he can't calm her down, I'll show him what I do and tell him that "she likes this" and I think that saying it that way makes him feel less like I'm bossing him around. So now Daddy and Daughter are getting along wonderfully. Just try to make play time a family affair so she can see that you love Daddy too and make things pleasant for everyone so that the two of them will relate pleasantness with eachother. I hope that helps. It's certainly helped me.

Answer 4

My husband has the same problem with our 4 week old baby girl...she gets so fussy around him and the other day when we were looking for day cares and I went in side ti get some info he called me from the car all pissed off because she was hungry and screaming. So I told him to make her a bottle....DUH..I mean it don't have any probelms when it come to me taking care of her but he is on a tight leash.  I think that it has to do with how confident the baby feels around him...like my mom alwys tells me, she's not happy until your happy...babies can sense then tension and tend to be more irritable...he just needs to relax.. and try and be a little more patient...... hope things get better for you.