Help me please. I'm a severe narcissist and violently depressed.?

Question

I think im a narcissist because every single person I see whether it be on TV or not... I always think I have to be better than that person. When I look at my friends and see that they've been to places or did things without my knowledge, I would usually get severely depressed

and angry at them to the point that I want them all dead.

I'm also constantly having an unhealthy obsession over fictional characters of whom I feel that im connected to. These characters are all youthful pretty boys that my friends know that im obsessed about. If you want to see some of these characters, their names are Roy (Fire Emblem), Luneth (Final Fantasy 3), Heero (Gundam), etc. Just search them up on google.

My friends would sometimes think im g*y but the truth is that I'm in love with my own image and these characters represent the image I created myself to be. Sometimes I would go as far as sitting in front of the mirror and kissing myself just wishing to have a boyfriend that was me.

One thing I hate is Facebook because recently I lost all my friends and now all I see there are pictures of them having fun with each other while im left all alone. Now im feeling really depressed and I can't think about anything other than how much I want them to suffer amoung each other and how much they should want to be with me instead and only me. Sorry if im not making much sense since as I write this im still getting these urges to kill them or something.

I never think of suicide because that is really stupid since my death will mean little to everyone else. O another death due to depression? PSHH! NO ! I am not going like that. I need revenge or better yet to prove myself better than all of them. This revenge though is fueling into a bitter and harsh way of dealing with my friends and family which is really starting to ruin my life. I just don't know what to think anymore. I'm confused over everything. I want to be nice but I just can't... not to those that think that theyre better than me. I'm the most handsome... no other girl should love another guy. I'm the most educated... what others know I know more. I'm the best of this best of that. This is all I can think now .... can anyone help?

Answer 1

Um I personally think that you should be locked up somewhere.  And if no one will do you that favor, then you need to talk to a professional IMMEDIATELY.

Answer 2

um.... cant say that happened to me, and r u a guy or a girl cuz i got lost while reading? srry if it offended u in anyway, well u need 2 live life 4 ur self, not 2 show other ppl how happy u r or can be. just ignore ur friends if they bother u and go out more and live out ur dreams (dreams that dont involve killing ppl) do things u wudn't dare to do, again nothing dangerous 2 u or others around u, and stop thinking too much. decide what u want in life n wat makes u happy n go 4 it, dont be some1 ur not! u need 2 find some1 like u, and u cant do that unless u look, so good luck with that =)

Answer 3

You're aware of your short comings and that's good. You have a low self believe and self confident .. that's a pity. But don't be discourage. You can learn hos to correct them .. there are many books about or you can do a yahoo search.. But remember knowing from reading is nothing if you don't act. And you can not change in one night .. thus be patient and believe you can change.

Answer 4

Sorry to say but you face an uphill battle.  It is a good thing that you recognize you are this way most narcissist never get to this step because it is recognizing yourself as de-funked or have an issue that causes you to be different than others.  Maybe a good place to start is realizing what made you this way.  You are not born a narcissist rather your environment and personal/family relationships have made you this way into your adult life.  If you can unlock the emotional torments in your youth that causes you to be strongly emotionally deficient and N you should find ways to cope or at least soften your N more.  DO NOT go out and use your disgusting superficial charm to ruin some poor caring emotional girls life (your attracted to these types whether you know it or not if you are as you say narcissistic).  Good luck