Help on my little girl?

Question

I have a 7 year old little girl, she is great. She is nice, pretty smart and well mannered and so queit that sometimes I have to check to make sure that she is okay and she listens she is everything that I could ask for and so much more. I had her when I was 15 and her dad was 20. Well I haven't been with her dad since she was born because I just thought to myself that he really wasn't the best choice. Since then he hasn't seen my daughter & he has constantly been in & out of jail probally for 5 & a half years total time. Well last August he tracked us down and he wasn't in jail and seem do b doing okay for himself. I decided to give him a chance to participate in his child's life (she is his only child). In December of last year he went back 2 jail and he is still there to this date. He wrote a letter and he wants to see his daughter but she has kind of forgot about him u know out of sight out of mind. I just don't want her to be emotionally damaged. What should I do?

Answer 1

Maybe you should wait until she is a bit older. It probably wont be very easy for her to know she has a dad out there but she wont be able to see him often because of him being in prison. Or if you think she could handle it then you could try telling her.

It is upto you and how well you think she will take it i guess.

Answer 2

Well, it sounds like your judgements were right & he really wasn't the best choice for you. But since your daughter is 7 and already pretty smart, it sounds like you've done a fine job raising her all by yourself! So why exactly does she need her biological dad around, when he's clearly such an unsavory character? He may have been doing well for himself at that point in time, but if he's in jail again, that says something for where his heart REALLY is. It's none of my business what he's in for, but it doesn't really matter. What's he doing in jail when he has a beautiful little family on the outside? If that isn't reason enough to stay out of trouble, nothing will be. I'd cut ties with him now before your daughter gets hurt. If he really wants to be a part of her life, maybe you can work something out between the two of you where you could send him letters & pictures (like an open adoption type deal). But if you point out to him that you don't want him in your daughter's life because he's still so unstable & seemingly always in trouble, it puts it into perspective for him. He isn't going to like it, but it'll make it easier to swallow knowing that he only has himself to blame. Good luck with all of this.. I wish you & your daughter the best. It sounds like you're doing great without him.

Answer 3

lil help

Answer 4

Hi.. at the end of the day he is her father.. you seem like you have done a pretty good job so far, being a mum so young and all! she is 7 and will have a good idea of right and wrong.. I would maybe ask her ? see what she would like to do try not to influence her tell her you dont mind and you will love her no matter what and that he is her dad and you wouldnt balame her if she was interested? kids are pretty resilent.. you may be suprised she probabbly understands alot more that you think.. whatever you decide dont beat yourself up about it... barbara H ...