Help please, insecurity issues?

Question

I am a very insecure person, but didnt really realise untill I met my boyfriend. when i was 12 i went into care, then went home and when i was 14 i went back into care, and now i live with my boyfriend and his mum. I didnt have the best of childhoods nothing too serious, like no phyiscal abuse but i believe looking back now that there was alot of emotional abuse.

whilst growing up ive always felt quite confident at school and always had friends, i wasnt one of the popular ones tho and did get some bullying. since ive been with my boyfriend tho, another side of me has come out, its been a year and a half now. and im really starting to break down. i dont no how to explain it but i feel like i trust him, but then im so insecure i just always think things and my head just goes crazy, i think im so attached and scared of being alone. i really want help with this so much, i dont no if counsiling will help, im very good at hiding my feelings, but then when i get home and im alone i just feel like ****. my mum and my brother and sister live 200 miles away from me and we have a good relationship now but sometimes i just feel so upset becuase i just want to be with my family and sometimes get jealous my boyfriend and his mum. ive always been second best my hole life, like ive never been first to anyone. i no so many people care about me, but i just dont no what to do anymore, something has hit me today and i really need help with all my issues

Answer 1

Well Leah

if you think of yourself as second best you will be  try to look on the bright side of life i am involved with helping the homeless ,The alcoholic and drug problem people  not to mention other illness and i am so glad that i

have a home i also have been in grief over son and husband the list is endless  but i thank God for the health that i have and i am

all alone  and yes i know you can do it ,come on life is for living  your family loves you.  

and your boy friend   you are lucky   best wishes..

Answer 2

I'm sorry you've had such a rough time of it.  It sounds like you really do need counselling which will give you some good support to figure out some issues.  You may want to consider spending time back with your own family if you have a good relationship now with them.

Your insecurities could be because you may be realizing that you have been quite dependent on your bf and his mom and what happens if you or he should want out of the relationship then  you will have to ask "who am i on my own?", "what do I want for my life?"

Everybody has insecurities no matter where they come from or how rich or poor they are.  The best thing I can tell you is to be honest with everyone in your life who you trust and love.  People who care just want the best for you, no matter what that is.  

The other thing I know for sure is that you have to be the number 1 to yourself.  Love yourself, appreciate who you are and appreciate that because of what you have been through, you have learned so much that you can be a true blessing in the world and it starts with you.  Give to yourself kindness, compassion, patience, understanding and acceptance.

If you're feeling really low today, be gentle with yourself but don't let it go on too long.  Put a smile on your face even if it's fake it will fool your brain into releasing feel good chemicals, for real it works!  Write a love letter to yourself or write thank you letters to those in your life.  Most of all, reach out, get the help you need and believe in your own strength.

Answer 3

well if you have a gd relationship

live with ur mom!

not ur bf

and your only 14!!

imagine how ur folks muct be feeling without you

its both ways here!

move home

talk to your mom or sis or bro

whoever you feel closer to!!

Answer 4

HI, You don't say How old you are now.  If you and your family has a good relationship maybe you should go home for a while . Catch your breath and look around and see if he is really what you want.Talk to your family Dr. if you have one, there is also clinics you could go to. It might just boil down to hormones and you might have some depression there from the verbal abuse. Hang in there..

Answer 5

Remember: Be cool - like Fonzy.

Answer 6

EVRYONE she is 17 y/o hey go visit your mom for a week or two thats all u need its call home sick.