Help what else can I do to help my friend find her birth family in Elmira, NY?

Question

I have placed an ad in the local paper around the holiday but still no luck. She is trying to request non identyfying info from the state of NY but it's taking forever. Her adopted family isn't very helpful. Any other ideas? She's already registered on this site: http://registry.adoption.com/records/396837.html

Answer 1

Does she know where as in what agency she was adopted from or what lawyer may have handled it?  You said it was from NY, does she have a specific part it might be better to place ads in the paper of the town she was born in.  She might call radio stations or newspapers and see if they can help her out

Answer 2

There is one thing to consider why her family may not be help. If her family is from Elmira, then they might be helping out another family member and keeping it a secret.

From what I have gathered through the years, there are definitely secrets in that town. I have "family" in that town and secrets are definitely kept. I do not speak with them nor with me.

Good luck to your friend.

Answer 3

There is a great search group on Yahoo where you will get loads of help and ideas

http://groups.yahoo.com/group/nyadoptees...

I'm wondering why her adoptive family is unhelpful.  Search is not a reflection on how we feel about our families, it is just a search for answers about our origins. Perhaps they need reassurance of that and to really sit down and discuss it.   I know this helped my family.    They have no right to withold information from her, but at the same time, they may have very little info - I know mine had hardly anything

Have you emailed the State registry to ask why it's taking so long.   The Health Code states they must do this promptly, you may want to cite that when you contact them

Answer 4

the reason her famly isn't helpful they may not know or they know and feel that she is theres. there are many people that feel that way and determining when she was adopted and how they were brought up it could be very upsetting ot them. you can write the health department if you knew her real name that would help. you can check records and stuff its hard with no clues at all. but maybe if she sat down with her foks and talked to them they might help you never know if they know why and she can gell them.