Help with Egyptian men for a Muslim American woman?

Question

Assalaam alaikum!

Hi! Let me start my introducing myself. I am 23 years old, American, Muslim, and wear hijab. My family and I just moved to Cairo, Egypt to study Islam and learn Arabic. I am the oldest of six kids. We have been here for two weeks already, and it's been quite a ride! There are many things I don't understand though, and I'm hoping, if you all don't mind, to find some clarity here. :)

My first question is pertaining to Egyptian men. The other day I was out by myself, and this guy came up to me and started talking to me. I didn't really think anything much of it, it seemed like he just wanted to ask me about my phone, they don't have this kind over here. And then he started asking me where I'm from, and saying I was beautiful, and then he told me I love you! Why would he say something like this!? I don't understand. I was so shocked, I just met this guy. I was under the impression that an Egyptian man would not come up to a woman and start talking to her because he didn't want to offend her honor or something.

Is what he did something that would have been offensive to an Egyptian woman? Should he have not done that? He kept standing there talking, and I didn't know how to leave. I was there for maybe 20 minutes. It's not like he was creepy or anything, he seemed to be a perfectly nice guy, but I think I maybe I should not have been standing there talking to him? In America, it wouldn't have been an issue me talking to him, but over here I don't know.

What would the people who saw us talking think? Are they going to think that I'm a bad woman now? lol, I never had this problem before. In the US, when people saw me with hijab they thought I was the best of women, I enjoyed an elite status, but over here, now I'm just like everybody else.

And lastly, what does it say about him that he would do this? At the time I didn't think any of this was a big deal it's normal where I come from, but now thinking about it, I'm worried.

Anything you could tell me that could inshallah clear things up for me, would be greatly, greatly appreciated. Thanks in advance!

Answer 1

it will happen again and again if they realise you are not egyptian ask any western woman who visits egypt regularly.

why i am not sure,  certainly some are looking for money, presumably some are looking for a visa to america, and some are just curious. you need to learn to say no very firmly and sadly lose the good manners you have learnt. Sadly the men who do this do not take polite manners seriously and often the only way to get rid of them is to be very terse almost to the point of rudeness. i know i will get a lot of thumbs down for this but its still true.

Answer 2

I had met many Egyptians through my job in the U.S. and found them to be very personable and warm, but when I went to Egypt last year I felt overwhelmed by the attention given to me by Egyptian men.  I suspected in most cases it was to acquire a trip back to the U.S.  Even one of the hotel managers at a four-star hotel was asking that I bring him back to the States with me.  I don't know what I think of the whole thing because previously, I had great relationships with them, but they are a different culture than ours with different cultural norms.  Still, I had such a wonderful time there, I would definitely go back again and might even live there!

Answer 3

well.... I'm Musim too and I know a little about Egypt. I think what he said I love you maybe meant in his way that he thinks your cool or something.

Answer 4

Let us jump to the conclusion.

Conclusion:

You will find many smart azz playboys like that everywhere in the world . Haven't you ever been to New York? Didn't you see the old black man who wanted to express his admiration of the old  white lady sitting at the bus stop and so he said to her :" I like your dress" and the old lady answered: " I am willing to sell for 20 $" I seen them discussing it for an hour!. And I enjoyed it.

Answer 5

welcome in egypt and congratulation for being a muslim and wearing the hijab , iam an egyptian muslim and know what happened to you it is just harassment that clarify that not all muslims apply islam even in Egypt

iam very sorry for experiencing something like this but you know some individuals defame the picture of islam whether in Egypt or any other country

i have 2 requests from you

since you are an American and you know islam if you got to such a situation tell the guy that you are a muslim and shouldnt do that and believe me he will be shocked my other request is try to know other Americans in the hood and start  explaining islam to them believe me you will be with great influence and every one accept islam because of you will add to you a new record of good deeds

contact me if you need any links regarding islam

BR

basem

  

Answer 6

JUST KEEP WALKING and give this GUY any attention because he THought now  that he i WIN because u stopped and talking to him And how he can say that he loves you while he Don't know you

Anyway he is Just a Guy who like to get a Foreign girl friend so keep walking he cant touch u to stopped you  And ma ADVICE that never give him any attention

Answer 7

Aslamoo alaykom sister in islam

I would like to introduce myself ima muslim girl who has egyptian parents, been to egypt a lot and lives in america her whole life. i understand what u went through 2day and i will like to tell u not to feel worried. if u havent noticed ppl in egypt are totalyy different than ppl in america. In egypt ppl are more warm, easy to talk to, out going and helpful, but unfortunately there are sum drawbacks. u have to be very VERY careful when guys especially *** up to u. they talk to u flirt say rude comments. the best way i learned from experience is to ignore. when u answer back, they think ur interested in them. probably the guy that saw u wanted to say im interested in u but it came out  as i love you. dont feel worried and u will have a lot ofexperience'ss like these. just be careful. its really hard for meto explainn how to react but i can tell u this, dont  make it into a big deal im sorry if i wasnt much of help but i tried

Answer 8

i will guess from what you say here.

Egyptians in general are warm and sociable .

this man may have talked to you to make you feel comfortable in Cairo.

he may also wish to brag a little with his friends that he spoke to that beautiful American girl wearing the hijab.

he may be investigating getting closer to you , perhaps marrying you ,and going to the US .

about what others would think of you , try to be nice in casual conversations , but brief so as not to be misunderstood by ANY ONE .

i hope i have helped  in shedding light on this cross cultural issue .

Answer 9

I'm a Muslim too and I live in the UAE and know lots of Egyptian people... and I used to live in Canada before I moved here so I know the differences :)

Arabs (especially Egyptians) tend to be soft and friendly but they cant speak English too good. So by "I love you" he must have meant that he thinks your cool or something (like the first answerer said).

And let me tell you, the average Muslim in a Muslim country tends to have weaker faith and is less religious than the average (true) Muslim living in the US or Canada or some other non-Muslim country.

Answer 10

hiya.. how are u i have read what u are saying ,, let me tell you something regarding egyptian ,, im arabic muslim women i live in kuwait i know more about egyptian people they have sence of humor friendly ,, on the other hand they like to build a relation ship with people from western country like british or american i dont know why dont ask me lol .. i dont think if ever u talking to his guy people might staring and wondering why u are talking to this guy and wearing hejab,, cuz egyptian women did the same so whats wrong if u are talking to guy wearing hejab !! if u are in kuwait it might be slightly different unlike egypt cuz u can find some of them open and they are not appling islamic rules honestly .

be ware of him u are the one who can decide his feelings towards you /

becareful you have to detect of what he is looking for ,,

best wishes

  

Answer 11

I'm IBRAHIM EL SHAFEY, Professional Arabic language teacher for non-arabic speakers (face to face in Cairo, & online)..

If you want to START communicate with me;

Cairo - Egypt

[phone].

[e-mail]

And add me..

Answer 12

I am Egyptian and My Analysis:

1) "this guy came up to me and started talking to me"

That is not a normal behaviour in the street. I guess you may have been in social place, like a Club or something, then I would not be surprised.

2) "and saying I was beautiful, and then he told me I love you"

Maybe his english is not so good and he just wanted to say that you are cool, or he is Naive to tell a girl never knew before something like this. He will never do this to an Egyptian girl, she will usually show him the size if her shoes if he did that to her !! :)

3) "Egyptian man would not come up to a woman and start talking to her because he didn't want to offend her honor or something"

This was the case last time I was there before I left in 2002

4) "Is what he did something that would have been offensive to an Egyptian woman? Should he have not done that?"

Yes

5) "he seemed to be a perfectly nice guy, but I think I maybe I should not have been standing there talking to him?"

You are abolutely right !

6) "What would the people who saw us talking think? Are they going to think that I'm a bad woman now?

If you think too much about what people think in Egypt, you will leave very soon !!

7) "when people saw me with hijab they thought I was the best of women, I enjoyed an elite status, but over here, now I'm just like everybody else"

Remember, your Hijab is not for peopel. You do it for Allah (SWT)

8) "And lastly, what does it say about him that he would do this?"

What he did was wrong. I can't really judge him more than that.

9) "I'm worried"

don't. You will learn with time. It is a different culture and you will enjoy after a while. Just be yourself and learn the about people and their way of life. It doesn't mean you have to do exactly the same.

If you have any other questions, we will be happy to help you.

.