Help with a paper I'm writing for school?

Question

Ok so over the summer we had to read the book "Hatchet by Gary Paulsen." And we had to wright a 4 -5 paragraph paper on it. I have 2 questions....

1. In an essay are you allowed to start a sentence with And or Because?

2. I had to wright my whole paper answering this question: What do you think would have happened to Brian if he had found the survival pack much earlier? Would he be the same person he became under hte books surcumstances? so how does my essay sound so far (not done yet.)

Thirteen year old, Brian Robeson was on a plane to visit his father in the northern Canadian wilderness, when his pilot had a heart attack and died. Brian was left to land the plane by himself. He landed the plane in a lake and managed to escape to land. Brian was stranded there for fifty four days and lost seventeen percent of his body weight.

I think that if Brian had found the survival pack much earlier he would have been found a lot sooner because of the emergency transmitter. Brian would have also not had to hunt because of the food packets in the survival pack. The survival pack would help him get a fire going much sooner and he would of been able to catch fish a lot easier and faster with the fishing line and hooks. If Brian would have found the survival pack earlier he would not have to go through many of the struggles that he did go through.

If Brian had found the survival pack a lot earlier he would not be the same person that he was when he was finally found. Because of having to do things for himself, it made Brian a lot tougher and he learned to see things differently. Brian also had grown the ability to observe something and react to it quickly.

Answer 1

If you begin your sentence with the word "and" followed by a comma, it is technically correct. I think you would be better off if you did not do this though.

If you begin a sentence with "because", there is real danger of writing a sentence fragment. If you just don't start with subordinating conjunctions like since or because, you probably won't write that many fragments. If you start a sentence with "Because Henry loved Anne," that's fine if you add another independent clause such as, "he proposed to her." You get, "Because Henry loved Anne, he proposed to her." That's fine. Just "Because Henry loved Anne," is a fragment.

Your essay isn't bad except for one thing. Your thesis is in the wrong spot. Take the first sentence of your second paragraph and move it to the end of your first paragraph and remove the "I think that if" out. Take out the comma after "thirteen year old," and I think you're good to go.

Good luck.

Answer 2

I loved hatchet when I was in 6th grade. 1. the answer s no. 2. I love your paper it tells detail about the character and his travels for the last paragraph I would agree because if he had found the survival pack much sooner then he wouldn't have become who he was before he went on the trip.

Answer 3

I don't think you are supposed to start any sentence or paragraph with and or because.

So far it seems good but maybe you could add a bit more detail, it sounds a tad choppy but its a good start!

Good luck on your essay =)