Help with comebacks/getting people to back off?

Question

once in awhile people will poke fun at me because i am deaf, and i also tend to be insanely hyper. Anybody got comebacks or something i could use?

Answer 1

I like to make sarcastic comments like After we've talked about the deaf person behind her back, next can we go beat up the person in a wheelchair?

Or the occasional--"one day I hope I'm as cool as you"

Or since you are hyper--"wow even for someone as hyper as me, you are STILL a buzz kill"

"Funny I would have sworn your ex (girlfriend) was lying when she said that about you.  hmmm.  guess not"

or pick on their crack.  "Was that your best crack on me?  wow.  perhaps a couple creative writing classes can help you out"

Answer 2

As we say in South Texas,"Step back or I'll open me up a nice big can of WHOOP@SS and give out  some multiple servings!"

"F*** Off,or you're gonna  have (enter your weight) of  Wax On,Wax Off!"

"You're so dumb,you thought menopause was a button on the  remote".