Help with international adoption(Serious Answers only)?

Question

Here is the problem my friend is 24 years old with one kid. But she desperately want another one.. However she's single.. But i read about an international adoption agency you need to be at least 25.. And i read numerous of international adoption success stories.. i told her to adopt in Ethiopia the children are beautiful over there.. But the adoption cost is a lot.. Are these people selling these poor children or what? IS THERE ANYWAY SHE COULD DO THE ADOPTION WITHOUT THIS AGENCY STUFF.. CANT SHE JUST HIRED A LAWYER AND DO THAT. OR GO OVER THERE VISIT THE ORPHANS AND ADOPT A CHILD JUST LIKE ANGELINA JOLIE AND MADONNA... THEY DIDNT GO THROUGH THAT AGENCY STUFF.. PLZZ SERIOUS ANSWERS YOUR OPINION DOES MATTER.

Answer 1

Each country has their own rules/policies/laws when it comes to international adoption.   I would first start with figuring out which country you want to adopt from and see what their laws are.   You have to be very careful that you don't get scammed - that's why I've heard most do require an agency to help you through.  My cousin adopted 2 children from Guatamala - and the process went smoothly - not sure if there was an age requirement or not.

Answer 2

Serious answer - how much money does your friend have?  If she wants to adopt just like Angie and Madge, she needs to  spend millions  of dollars to buy a baby "just like" they did.  She needs to wine and dine officials in Africa and then donate a ka-zillion dollars to the orphanage (i.e., grease the palms of the directors) to steal a child.

I doubt that you will like my serious answer, but that is, seriously, how they don't have to deal with all of that "agency stuff".

Answer 3

Actually Angelina does use agencies and gets homestudies and all of that like the rest of us, she just keeps it private and doesn't announce anything until its almost time for her to pick up the child. I think Madonna's must've been an independent adoption though since there is no standard adoption law in Malawi, thus there wouldn't be an agency working there. My advice for your friend is to do a lot of research. She needs to find out about the reasons why children are being given up in certain areas, if there is much history of corruption, what the requirements are...she'll need to research agencies and find one that is ethical (as much as an agency can be) and will have her interests AND the child's interests at heart. She should also try to make sure the child she adopts is a true orphan, without any family members who are able to take care of them (unlike Madonna). She should also read up on attachment, adoptee grief and loss, read some blogs by first mothers and adoptees, read up on post institutionalized behaviors, and talk to others who have adopted children from the area your friend is looking into.

There are areas where independent adoptions can be done, such as Haiti and Ghana, which are inexpensive to adopt from, but it can be very tricky and the potential for corruption on the other side is higher when you don't have someone checking out for these things for you.

Answer 4

International adoption laws and decrees vary according to the country the adoption originates in. In order to adopt from anywhere you need to pay fees. In a domestic adoption you may be able to get away with hiring a personal lawyer but with an international one there are specific laws in each country. Also in any adoption there needs to be two lawyers, one to handle the prospective adopters paperwork and needs and one to act in the child's best interest. Every orphanage also has it's own guidelines to follow.

No matter how you look at it adoption is baby brokering, some are just done to a lesser degree. International adoptions come with their own high price tag in regards to them physical and emotional health of the child and subsequent culture shock from being removed from their native land.

I strongly encourage anyone looking into domestic or foreign adoptions to study up on adoption relates issues and disorders and know fully the possible issues and challenges that could surface.

Answer 5

Honestly, I would tell your friend just to wait a year until she's old enough to go through an adoption agency.  It's only one year or less.  And so much can change in that time.

Plus, being single, does she realize how hard it is to date and such having kids?  Especially more than one.  My bf was perfectly honest with me and said that if I had had more than one kid he probably wouldn't have dated me.  Just because having kids can cause a lot of stress on a relationship.

Answer 6

Well you have to remember the Angelina Jolie and Madonna are famous so that right there means that get pretty much what ever they want without going through the c**p us normal people have to. As far as the adoption process she probably contact a lawyer and she if there are any loop holes that she could get through.

Answer 7

First of all, yes, most agencies/ countries require adoptive parents be at least 25 years old, and in some cases even older. Many will allow you to start the process if your only a few monthes from turning 25. Only a few countries allow single women to adopt. Ethiopia does, but only through certain agencies, and the wait may be longer.

   There are a lot of expenses involved with international adoption, but when you're going through a reputable agency, then NO, they are not "selling babies".  The costs include; employing social workers in both the US and foreign country, costs of maintaining the agency, medical care for ALL children in orphanage/ foster care (including those with expensive medical needs), employing caregivers, nurses, doctors, ect. in orphanage or children's home, upkeep of orphanage and supplies, travel expenses, costs for visas, passports, and other legal documents, fees for processing dossier, and homestudy, and much more.

These countries don't have government funded social welfare programs like we do in the US. With out adoption fees, many of this decent orphanages would not be able to stay open.

  Most countries will require you to work with a lisenced adoption agency or facilitator. While a few may allow you to "do it on your own", this is not recommended, as it can be much more risky, and opens up doors to all sorts of unethical practices by unregulated foreign lawyers and facilitaters. It is also often just as expensive if not more the adopting through an agency. International adoption is a serious and complicated endevor, and not something you should  try to do "the cheap way"

Also, with the exeption of Madonna, who adopted from a country that usually doesn't allow international adoption, Angelina Jolie, and other celebrity adoptive parents DID go through adoption agencies, had to meet country requirements, and and had to pass homestudies just like other adoptive families.

  If your friend truely wants to adopt internationally, she should go through a reputable agency. There are many ways to afford adoption, here are some sights that can help

http://affording.adoption.com/

http://www.affordingadoption.com/grants....

I hope this helped.