Question:

Help with the loss of a loved one?

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My thirteen year old cat died on the morning of my GCSE results. It was the worst day of my life and now I feel that I will never get over it. He was always in my room and I just can't get over him not being around. I just want him back so much and I don't know how to cope. People have been sympathetic but I know that most of them just think I'm being weird. Please help, I feel hopeless without Casper

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  1. I feel sorry for you as well, Casper was a real family member and a great comfort to you.

    I do not know about your GCSE results and hope they were good but from your message they sound as if they were not so good.

    Now remember if a cat is loved and part of the family then it is right to grieve and anyone who says otherwise does not know the love Casper gave you and you him.

    Go and get a toy cat and sleep with him and call him Casper that will give you something to hug and it is not sissy.  I sleep with one and I am 66.

    Next look at your GCSE results and decided where you went wrong.  Write a list of jobs you would like to do and a list you don't.  take the list you do and look at the papers and see what sort of qualifications they want.  ring round and ask them what they want.  

    next make an attempt to recover your esteem and study for what you really want.

    I hope in time you will not forget Casper but learn to live with the experience.  never forget just add to your experiences of life.

    May you love, love.  Look at my site and if I can help further then do eamil me, the site might well give you courage www.healers2006.co.uk

    G


  2. just sooth yourself saying how good you were to him ,and go for vecation and leave your house for sometime

    dont buy anything now after some months ,buy a dog ,parrot,or anything else dont you ever buy a cat

    as a faithful way to say to him you wont replace him

    dont be like some people replace things

    thats cant be honesty

  3. I have lost many beloved pets before, and its always hard to cope.

    But I DO know that it gets easier. I lost my cat, Annabelle, whom I had for like all my life (since I was a baby), and it was hard for the first couple of months and then I realized that she wasn't suffering anymore and was with all the other pets in Heaven. ( I like to think there is a special place in Heaven for animals). :D

    Hope I helped. :D

  4. Someone poisoned my 8 year old Boston Terrier, Godzilla, about three years ago.  I spent literally days sobbing like a baby.  My husband and son buried him in the middle of pouring rain and they were both crying as much as I was.  Pets can be like children to you because they give you unconditional love and are always there when you need them.  You're not being weird, you're being a good friend to an animal who was a good friend.

  5. Animals become a part of our lives, almost like our 'kids'. Grieving the loss takes time. For some time is longer and others is short. You will know when the right time for you is and then you;ll be ready for another pet. Not to take the place of the one you lost, but to love for it's own unique personality. When I lost my pet miniature pig I swore I'd never get another pet. Then I fell in love with a beautiful kitten. She is a great joy to me and if something happened to her I'd be lost, again. Then if it's meant to be to have another one I'd know. Good luck.

  6. Im sorry to hear about your loss.  Im sure that you wouldnt want your cat, Casper to have suffered for long and that you would wish him well.

    I read somewhere recently that even when a cat or dog passes away that they visit us sometimes just to see how we are.  I cant remember the website though.

  7. Sorry for your loss,the thing is with animals they are so loyal,try to keep the good memories to help you cope.xx

  8. remember he went to a better place. what u can do is get another cat. any cat that can make u smile. u can get over it by getting out of ur room once in a while.  

  9. you will get over it, but why not write a poem about him, to help with the grief >

  10. Arr thats so sad. But its, everyone and everthing dies eventually, you will leard that as you get older. I know it hurts real bad now but soon you will be ok.

    I had too learn about death when i was 9, my mum died of breast cancer. Its just one of those things.

    Your little Casper lived a long life and im sure he was happy in your home and thats special. You will always have him in your heart. Keep a lil pic of him in a nice frame nxt to your bed and say nite to him before you go to sleep. Cry when you feel like you need too, it will get better soon.

    XXXX For Casper, im sure he is happy in heaven.

  11. Get another cat that looks the same x

  12. You're not being weird at all,that was your baby!!! Your best friend!!! Casper lived a long time and got to spend some or all of it with a caring and loving person such as yourself.I know when my cat passed of Lukemia,i felt the pain hit hard in my heart,and it does ease after awhile,but you will never forget.I now have another cat,he does not replace my dearest one that is in Kitty heaven,but i love him just the same.Take your time,greiving is good now,you will feel better.Make a lil scrapbook if you can,with Caspers pic and a few short stories in it.

  13. Sorry to hear that. It is part of life's cycle. You have to realise that animals usually have short lives compared to us. As stated the best way to get over this is to obtain another pet.

  14. Remember that even with losing a pet we go through the stages of grief and it is normal to experience these feelings.  These stages are:

    denial (I don't feel this way!  It didn't happen!)

    anger (Why did it happen?  I am so angry at you for dying!)

    bargaining with your higher power (God just let him live another day.  God if you let me feel better, I'll be a better child/parent/etc.)

    depression (It doesn't matter.  I'll never feel better.)

    acceptance (It happened.  I'll get over it.)

    While the stages "officially" go in that order they can come in any order or come two or three at once...and you will know when you have grieved enough.  Allow yourself to grieve it is a natural part of the healing process of getting over the loss of a pet.  It took me a long time to get over the loss of my first cat, and even longer before I felt like I could get another one, although some people feel ready to do that sooner.

    Just let yourself feel the grief, it is normal.

    Best of luck to you.

  15. awe that's sad i lost mine last year he was 15 so i understand ....  you cant get him back but the pain does ease with time and it must have been Casper's time to go ... remember all the Nice things the funny things he used to do i know it doesn't feel like it at the moment but you will get through this talk to someone close to you share how you feel.

    hope tour exam results were what you wanted..........

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