Helping a child overcome fear of the dark?

Question

We have a 7-year old son. He is incredibly intelligent (yes, I am proud, but he really is) ;-) Anyway, he has really developed a deep fear of the dark. He occasionally has bad dreams and that scares him too. He has a night light. We read fun stories before bed - including a children's Bible story to try to get him thinking about good things and he says his prayers. Any ideas on how to help us gradually help alleviate this fear for him? Thanks!

Answer 1

How about giving him a flashlight to sleep with?  After he falls asleep you could turn it off.  Then if he awakes in the middle of the night, he could reach under his pillow and turn the flash light on.  This worked for my stepson when he was around the same age.  Good luck!

Answer 2

Get a really cool spray bottle fill it with water and a few drops of essential oil (lavender, clary sage, or whatever you like) Then tell him this is special water that gets rid of bad dreams or what ever you deem fit. Have him spray where ever he wants before bed. The scent will calm his mind and the thought of it being special water should help. Mind over matter.

Answer 3

,is his bedroom door open so you can hear him.does someone scare him with bad stories or movies,not at home but else where

Answer 4

Don't make such a big deal about it. At times even us adults don't want to be in the dark alone. Just do what I did.....leave the lights on. Either a small light on the nightstand or even the room light, whatever it takes to make your son feel secure. I left the closet light with the door wide open, the hall light, and the bathroom light on until my daughter felt safe. Now she only uses a small night light. The most important part is to make your son feel safe and secure. Tell him to pick how many and what lights he wants on, and make sure you leave them on all night. It will get better.

Answer 5

Get a octalamp for his room it will make it easier to sleep

Answer 6

I think a lot of kids are afraid of the dark.. even grown-ups don't sometimes like a totally dark room. There are some nightlights which run on very low electricity... it's just like a glowing nightlight.. it has pictures turning around on it when it is plugged in...fish.. butterflies...anything.. and the light is so low any child can fall asleep.. and it's also safe..in case he needs to get up during the night and find the bathroom...he won't struggle to find back into bed..a lot of people do that and it's also relaxing to look at for a while at the slowly revolving..Fish or butterflies..etc... it's like really looking at an aquarium.. that put's grown ups to sleep. It's nice to look at, cheap and during the day you just unplug it...

I believe everybody has a fear of something...even if it's vertigo...I suffer from that.. some things you can overcome and some things you got to learn to live with..if it doesn't affect a persons life...if a person is not agoraphobic or claustrophobic.. if it's not a real phobia then i believe it's alright to have some fears. but if the fear turns into a phobia then one can see a specialist.. but I see no need for that for your son...it's a natural fear.. darkness..

Good luck...also ask him maybe if anyone told him something about the darkness.. maybe he read something.. somebody else told him a spooky story he can't forget.. or he saw something on Tv and he is very imaginative.. that might have ignited the fear initially...and now it festers...

Best of luck..

Answer 7

well, i was afraid of the dark untill i was 12! so ya...lol i really dont know what to tell you!! u and him could go around his room before he goes to bed, checking for whatever he is afraid of! then he would know that there is nothing  there to hurt him!! actually i was not afraid, i just find it hard(even sometimes now!) to fall asleep in the dark! good luck!!!

Answer 8

don't worry, when your child reaches a certain age he will grow out of this fear

but for now, try to make him stand up to his fear

in scary movies now adays, they usually show that monsters, ghosts, (scary stuff) usually come out in the dark. so u just have to encourage him to go into a dark closet. close the door, and say, "if anyone is there, come out and show me" no one will come out. and when your son comes out of the closet he will know there is nothing to be afraid of when he is in the dark.

it also helps if when he is sleeping give him a lot of pillows to build a wall around him so he feels safe and protected.

that's what i did when i was little.

GOOD LUCK

Answer 9

You should get him to confront his fears.  Try making up a chant that he can say when he is in the dark or scared.  Something like "The dark is nothing, I am not scared of the dark, I am not scared of the dark."

Answer 10

My grandson, who lives with me, still uses a night light.  I never made a big deal about it.  He just feels more comfortable with it.  He had issues with abandonment, so I was just happy when he wasn't afraid to fall asleep in his own room alone!

Answer 11

It is a difficult one.

Maybe ask him what is so scary... like, is it monsters under the bed, the fear of not waking up, the fear of something happening to you guys, or what. I had a deep fear of the dark when I was young, and it was that burglars and werewolves could get through my window (big 2x2 meter window in my room).

From here, you can develop a good plan of action. Like, the thing that helped me was having my door open, where the light in the hallway was on, and I could hear the television- so I knew people were still awake downstairs, where I could get help..

But yeah... find out what his major fear is, and from there, combat it.

Answer 12

use a night light and gradually get darker

Answer 13

Most kids have fear if dark becasue they can't see even with a night light and most do out grow it. Doe she sleep with any stuffed animals or does he have any? Sometimes kids need something they can cuddle up to that makes them feel safe. So he is seven some kids sleep with an stuffed animal till they are 10.  He is still a kid maybe leave the door a open a crack with the all light on so if he gets really scare dhe knows yu are right down the hall.

Answer 14

Im 22 and still afraid of the dark. lol its just one of those things some people never get over.

Answer 15

My younger son, who is 8, is afraid of the dark. He is very smart and confident otherwise, so this fear doesn't really  fit him, but we have learned to just accept it and help him. We don't make fun of him and try to be with him when he goes into a dark room or part of the house. I think this is due to his huge imagination and creativity level and as he matures he will learn to deal with his fears better. My son doesn't enjoy scary Halloween stuff, hunted houses, etc. - it's all the same fear to him. He sleeps with a sound machine (white noise), a night light and the door opened and that gives him the level of security he needs.

Don't make too much of this, your son is still very young (we expect so much of our kids these days, don't we?) and he will be a confident young man before you know it.

Be there for him as much as you can, when he's afraid and respect his feelings.

Hope this helps!

Answer 16

Turn off the TV.