Helping my daughter deal with a show off?

Question

My daughter is in a summer gymnastics class (6-8yo). The 1st week a little girl laughed at her whenever she couldn't do things, and said, "I can do that, see" etc. Even on things my daughter could do, the girl was very "look at me do it" to my daughter.

The 2nd week I told my daughter to ignore the girl if she tried to show off. The girl ended up poking my daughter & hitting her arm trying to get her to watch, & when the teacher asked my daughter why she was being hit, my daughter replied the girl was a show-off. After class the girl told her Mom & her Mom loudly said that some people are just jealous.

The 3rd lesson's tonight, & I've told my daughter that the little girl just wants approval, so if she tries to show off my daughter should just say nice things, such as "Wow, you're good", "Awesome job", etc, & have fun with it.

1) Is that a good way for my daughter to deal with it?

2) I wouldn't say my daughter is jealous. Is there another word for disliking a show off?

Answer 1

First of all the other child is not a show off she's a bully. Ask your daughter how she feels when this girl does this. I would go straight to the head of the class and let them know about the situation.

The other girl should never hit your child or any other child for that matter. Does she do it to other children?

You know your child better if this is affecting her, and no one is really doing anything about it change her class. If she wants to continue and says she can handle it make sure you keep talking and encouraging her. Just make sure that this child doesn't hit her. Also see if you can hang around and watch from afar without being seen and observe, then take it from there. I hope this helps you out some. Tell her I'm cheering her on!

Answer 2

i think that you're definately trying to handle this in the most civilized way possible. however your daughter telling this how off "awesome" and "thats cool" is feeding right into her need for approval and attention.

tell your daughter to continue to ingore her completely. if the show off tries to polk and hit her, have her politely tell the teacher that this girl keeps doing that (dont have her bring up the show off thing) and hopefully the teacher will put a stop to it. if the teacher doesnt, maybe you could bring it up to her in private.

but ingoring her the best way to go for sure.

good luck

Answer 3

Everyone gets tired of bousterous people. I think you have handled it marvelously.

Answer 4

no. dats just giving in 2 d bully. u have 2 find another way. ur daughter aint jealous. talk 2 the dance teacher/ d girls mom(if shes a reasonable person)

Answer 5

I honestly don't think that will work. That is just going to feed her "ego" more. And the little girl may not "get it".

Show your daughter how to stand up for herself. IF this girl does it again, have your daughter stand up to her and tell her to her face, "look, i really don't care what you can do, i'm here to enjoy myself and to learn to do something i enjoy doing. You can do what you want, but i do not care. " or something on that line.

Answer 6

I think that you are doing a wonderful job.  That's what I have always done with my children, 17,13, and 9.  She should show acts of admiration instead of jealousy.  Your concern is your daughter and how she handles things not someone elses daughter and their over the top attitudes.  This is a good learning experience for your daughter and it sounds as if you are doing a great job.  Keep it up...it will get better...one of those lessons in life and your daughter will benefit from it.  Good luck.