Hi everyone i'm back!What do think of these two poems?

Question

1st one ( my favorite )

Sailing in the Moonlight

I sail in the moonlight,

with waves going left and right.

I sail until morning,

to the sun's morning light.

Though when I go back home,

I don't stay for long.

For when the moon comes up,

i again start my song.

2nd poem

On my island

I sit on my island,

and watch the palm trees sway.

Yet again it's another sunny day.

Crystal blue waves crash on the shore,

as they come and make a splash,

they make a mighty roar.

I often wish i had someone to talk to,

but for now i find other things to do.

Hope you liked them!

P.S i'm 11

Answer 1

Like you, I appreciate the first of these two entries the most.  They are both simple poems but done well.  There are adults who post here who cannot spell six words in a row correctly, to say nothing of proper adverb, adjective useages, tenses used, and punctuation.  You are showing some really good skills in organizing your work (the presentation form) and in english skills which makes critiquing your work so-o-o-o much easier and pleasant.  

At 11 years of age, you are ahead of the game on these important points.  You seem to understand rhyme scheme and have good flow to your poetry.  I agree with another of your posters, you need exposure to "poetry", different styles, different authors, especially other amateur styles.  It's so invaluable to see the work of others.

Also put this important little link in your favorites, it's a treasure for any writer

http://www.rhymezone.com/

Answer 2

Your first poem, that explains that you don't want the beautiful night to go away and you want that to last forever. However, you have to go to the day time and enjoy more moment.

Your second poems, that explains when you're enjoying peace and quiet while you haven't. The longer the peace and quiet, you want to have some noise to avoid the empty lonely feelings.

I hoped I explained your poem's expression as much as I could. It's very impressive for 11 years old to reach to this level. Nice writing:)

Answer 3

knowing youre only 11 im obliged to answer you..i genuinely feel from the bottom of my heart that you have the taste and talent...i think the poems are great..but DO NOT confine yourselves to these... join the poetry site called allpoetry.com...improve yourself..read more...experiment with your style and contents..i think you have the talent