His Friend throwing temper tantrum right before wedding?

Question

one more question,

my fiance and I ran rescue together for a very long time and had some of the same friends. There was always this one girl (we'll call her joy)

who was uber jelous of what me and my fiance had. She had a chance with him but didnt take it at the time and at one point he did make out with her. I knew that she was a problem but didnt say anything for a long time. Finally she sent him a text saying that he was crazy for being with me and basically attacking me. He kept texting her even after I begged him not to. Now let fastforward, Invites to the wedding went out and she was on the list ( if she was going to be so mean about me I wanted to let her know that it was pointless ) she told my fiance that she was coming but now at the last minute (T minus eight days til the wedding) she is telling him what a stupid move it is to get married. He wont quit texting her. I have begged cried and done everything I possibly could but its not enough. My fiance loves me deeply and I dont question that but Joy is getting really annoying and then the drama just explodes with her older sister amy. They both run around and live irresponsibly... How do I get rid of her without making her disappear and lying to my fiance

Answer 1

Tell her that you are getting married, that its your choice and that she needs to stop texting him and maybe it would be best to not come to the wedding after all

Answer 2

She is not the problem, and I only say that because there are low-lifes like her crawling all over the world and we cant avoid them. Its your fiance who, instead of ignoring her, is only making the situation worse. What on earth is he texting her about? Does he love attention and drama? Girl, he is not respecting you at the moment. The surest way to get rid of her is for HIM to tell her to buzz off! Why hasnt he done that already?

Answer 3

I agree with the girls above me.Something is wrong and you need to figure out what it is. Either she wants something from him or vice versa, whatever it may be, it's not right. A man should respect what his wife or fiance wants and needs. Good Luck!!!

Answer 4

call off  your wedding NOW!!

This man does not love you. To allow ANYONE to verbally (and text) attack you. He must be getting something out of this.

This is the preview of married life with him. your feelings are not relevant to him. He knows the pain and stress this is causing you and he still allows it.. hon what is worse being in debt for a wedding that did not take place or married to a man that has no respect for you?

because the fact he has allowed this to happen just proves he has no respect.

I m sorry I know you love him. I know it sounds harsh. but right now he is choosing this woman over you. He is indulging her poison for what possible reason??

personally I think more than a make out session has happened

Answer 5

Usually I wouldn't suggest this for this sort of situation, for the simple fact that I try to avoid confrontation as well as keep people from confrontations. However, in this case, I think it's time *YOU* contact Joy and let her know your feelings. You've obviously done all you can to let your fiance' know your feelings (short of slapping him over the head with the phone he's using to text, but I digress). Perhaps you should call Joy and *politely* let her know you don't appreciate her attacking you like this. Let her know that you and your fiance' have your own life and that her opinions on it are not only not appreciated, but also unwelcome. Don't lower yourself to her level by getting an attitude. Kill her with kindness and be as sweet as possible.

I should also add that your fiance' is losing serious cool points by not respecting your feelings on this Joy person. Why is he constantly texting someone who is so negative about the fact that he's marrying you? You should also sit him down and calmly explain your feelings about her. You derserve more respect than that.

Answer 6

Your going to have to put your foot down with your friend.........tell her hey we are getting married and if you have a problem consider yourself un-invited.

Convince your Husband to do the same........he should send one final text telling her to finally accept the situation or not talk to you guys ever again....if she can't move on and accept with the situation theres little reason to be friends with someone like that.

Good luck on your wedding

Answer 7

If he won't stand by you now, what makes you think he will stand by you through the difficult times life and marriage will bring? I would do some serious reflection before marrying him. He is allowing her to tear you down, and ignoring your feelings on the issue. That is inexcusable.

Answer 8

Your fiance is part of the problem.  He keeps texting this woman. Does he enjoy the drama?  Does he still have feelings for her?  You need to tell her off.  And you need to tell your fiance not to have any more contact with her.

Answer 9

hm.... i don't understand why hes still texting her... especially right before you guys get married. are they friends? does he like the attention? i wouldn't even allow that girl to come to the wedding! my fiance has a "soft spot" for his ex. ( his previous ex was the cause of their breakup) he asked if she could come to the wedding because he hasn't seen her in so long. i told him," over my dead body!" your man should respect your wishes and you need to let him know this. if its bothering to the point where your crying and begging and he still wont do what your asking... i would take a moment to question how deep his commitment is.

good luck and don't let that girl show!