Holding fork and knife during meals?

Question

My boyfriend, who is from Russia, told me that when you are out to eat you are to always eat with both your fork and knife. The knife should always be in the right hand. I don't use it unless I am cutting. Is this proper etiquette, what he said? If so, why?? I think it makes you look like a caveman!

Answer 1

If it doesn't hurt anyone then it's okay.  As another answerer says, he could eat with his hands and that would be okay too.  We shouldn't be so uptight about food.

I'm a Brit and I eat with knife and fork in the manner you state.  I find it amusing to see all that swapping out that many Americans do in an attempt to use only one hand.  However if that's what they want to do then guess what?  That's fine too.

After being in Texas for nearly 3 years now, my wife and step-kids have slowly gone over to the European way of eating.  It's just easier.

It should be noted that the one-hand approach is born out of poverty (the early American settlers didn't have money to waste on a knife for everyone) and now remains only as a tradition.

Answer 2

southpaws not  withstanding, he  is  correct.  just  be  aware  that  it  is  how  civilized  people  are  taught. it  doesnt  mean you  have  to  eat your  KFC that  way but  when  in  an  elegant  setting  it  will  serve  you  well  just  to  accept  that  some  rules  have  stood  the  test of  time  for  good  reason , even  if  you  havent  bothered  to  learn them

if  you  must  have  a reason then  it  saves  you  leaning on  your  unused  elbow while  eating  with only  a  fork  in  onet  hand.

Answer 3

That is the continental way of eating.  It's the norm throughout Europe, UK, even Australia!  Only Americans seem to eat with their forks in their right hand, and cut up everything on the plate at once.  

It looks odd at first, but you get used to.  I've lived in Europe for so long that now I'm the odd one out when we go to the states!

Answer 4

Well being we are in america-- russian tradition shouldnt matter because americans are fat and sloppy and love food... and you can eat with your hands for all we care.

good luck... tell him its okay

Answer 5

Yes it is. I think its so caveman eating with your fork in your right hand. I always think when people do that there gonna get all cavey and start banging their fork on the table and start ranting 'we want food! we want food!'

Imagine he cooks you a nice romantic meal with a perfectly set table and yo then go and put your left elbow on the table and dig right in with your fork! Ugh! The knife is always in your right hand.... And It was in the movie physco too!!! lol

Answer 6

Well, don't know how to put this, but good table manners are to use knife and fork, yes. And fork should be in your left hand, knife in the right hand. He's absolutely right. Doesn't hurt to learn how to do it in case you ever go to an upscale formal dinner :) Remember the "Pretty woman" movie?

Answer 7

You can either hold both utensils, or cut and set your knife on the side of your plate. It is perfectly fine, but it is proper to cut no more than 3 or 4 pieces at a time.

Answer 8

If you are in the US, you only hold the knife when cutting. You then place it to lie across your plate when finished cutting. Americans also generally switch hands fork/knife when cutting and most Europeans do not. But generally in the US it is acceptable to either swap or not. Americans also typically hold their fork curled side up when putting the food in their mouth.

Answer 9

Your boyfriend is eating the standard continental way.  I spent a year in Europe and tried it out.  Now I won't go back to the American way.  If you think about it - why must you always be putting down the knife with your right hand then switching the fork to your right hand?  When you adopt the continental way it is like eating with two tools instead of one and you are able to manipulate your food around the plate a lot better.

If you are comfortable with the American way, then stick with it.  I just think the European way makes more sense.

So here is why Americans, after cutting there meat, put down the knife and then put the fork in the right hand and eat.  Originally we ate like the Europeans.  But remember from your history lessons about the revolutionary war when Americans had to house British soldiers in their homes?  Guess what, they all ate meals together.  Knives in those days were a lot sharper - the meat was a lot tougher.  The soldiers were scared of being knifed at the table.  They made the American colonists put down the knife after cutting there meat and then pick up the fork with their right hand to eat.  The tradition has stayed with us all these years.  So that is why Americans eat the way they do now and why the Europeans have never stopped using two hands at once to eat.

Answer 10

Are you asking about the fact that he keeps the fork in his left hand, or about him always holding his knife?

I keep the fork in my left hand when I eat, the way Europeans do.  Not sure where I got this, but it probably has to do with my being left-handed.

I use my right hand to cut, but I put the knife down when I'm done cutting.  Probably a good thing in terms of safety, since I tend to talk with my hands.  lol

In my opinion, your boyfriend should put the knife down when he's not actually using it to cut.  Not because he looks like a caveman, but because wielding a knife unnecessarily makes Americans uncomfortable.