Homeschool parents, where do your kids get their social interaction?

Question

Please, please note that I am NOT one of those people who thinks homeschool kids don't get any social interaction. I'm asking this to get some specific ideas for things to do with OUR kids (who will be homeschooled) when they are a little older.

Oh, and ideas for both boys and girls (separate or together) are welcome. It would also help to note the things you've found to really be "social" activities and those that weren't...I know that some that seem like they would be (ballet, for example) really are not because even though there may be 20 kids in the room, there is very little time actually spent interacting with the others.

Thanks!

Answer 1

Art classes.

Tae Kwan Do

Volunteer work

Homeschool Park Day

Science classes

Sewing classes

Horseback riding

Kids in the neighborhood

My child has made close friends in all the above situations.

I would also like to note that shutting children up in school all day does not promote good social interaction.  It does promote abnormal stress, fear and competition.

Answer 2

Oh my gosh, where to start.....

I have homeschooled for the past 15 years and my kids got their social contacts in the same manner that you do as an adult. My kids were/are out and about in the community on a daily basis. My kids are friends with the other kids in the neighborhood. My kids are involved in church and church-related programs. My kids have always been involved in library programs (summer reading programs, teen programs such as music montage, poetry readings, book discussion groups, film making, helping to write for the teen newsletter, etc), selling lemonade at their lemonade stands, going to grandparents and other relations, and just living life.

My kids always went to the store, the post office, the hardware, and other social situations where they interacted with others, if just in a business sense. But this taught them much. My kids held magic shows, made their own skits and plays and props and invited the neighbor kids over to "pay" to see them, and just all kinds of crazy things.

My kids spent the night with friends. They had friends spend the night here. They had slumber parties. They "camped" out in the back yard with the neighbor kids. They went to a day camp from the church down the street (which we do not belong to). They babysat, mowed lawns, and raked leaves for people in the neighborhood and beyond. They belonged to 4-H, helped me when I volunteered, and some chose to play sports. We had a ticket to the public pool, went on day trips, and often took walks in nice weather and had a picnic on the courthouse lawn while their peers were in school.

My kids now have jobs. One is married. One is looking for a different job than the one she has. They are just like any other kids except they are born leaders and sure of themselves. They are not peer-dependent. And they have a wide variety of friends whose ages are not all the same.

I just lived life with my kids, gave them a lot of freedom, and was always out in the public arena with them. If you are social, they will be, too. Unless you live on a deserted island or in a cave far removed from life, your kids will learn social skills without them having to be contrived. Just let them play in the neighborhood, hang out with their cousins, and go shopping with you. It'll happen.

Most people have been brain-washed into believing that kids are well-socialized because they attend schools. This is untrue. Kids who attend school are cut off from the daily happenings of life. They do not interact with other people who work, are in the community, or who do service work. These kids are locked up in classrooms with other kids who are the same age. This age segregation causes peer dependency, peer pressure, and the so-called "generation gap" because these kids are NOT socialized properly with people of all ages and backgrounds. The only adults whom they interact with the majority of their day is with teachers, and this contact is very limited. This kind of socialization is contrived, unnatural, and not conducive to truly socialized people. Kids in school are only allowed time to socialize right before school, between classes, on recess and lunch, and after school. Most of a kids' life is kept busy with a teacher dominating and controlling what they do. Kids are not socializing most of this time.

Real socialization is what happens when one is busy living life on a daily basis while interacting with their families and in their communities.

Answer 3

My best socialization activites as a homeschooled kid were my homeschool group, homeschool co-op, and my church youth groups.

I also made friends during junior high on a youth basketball team where most of the kids in the league were homeschooled.  I played other sports and participated in other sports lessons, and although I didn't make any lasting friendships in those, they were still fun and allowed me to get some interaction at the time.

I also participated in two different girl scout troops - I've found that those really depend on the quality of the troop leader, and unfortunately, both of my leaders were pretty uninvolved.  I think it could be a very good option though.

I also took a few kids classes that were offered by a community college during the summer.  Again, no lasting friendships, but I learned a lot and they were fun at the time.

The neighborhood was really a great socialization place for me as a kid.  I was lucky enough to live in several kid-filled neighborhoods.  Just get a trampoline and the kids will flock to your house!  haha.

I also participated in a couple YMCA and park district sports that were held specifically for homeschoolers.  It was funny because, with those classes, the instructors didn't seem to take class as seriously as they did with the "normal" classes.  That was a bad thing because we didn't learn as much about karate or swimming, but a good thing because the lack of structure allowed for a lot of social interaciton!

Answer 4

Here is a list of what my son is currently doing, or has done in his five years of HS'ing.  I've put double asterisks for the more social ones.

*Community track teams - indoor, outdoor, cross country

*Community soccer team

**HS PE classes at the YMCA

**HS Art classes at the YMCA

*HS Swimming lessons at the YMCA

*Community swimming lessons

**HS educational cooperative with 135 other HS'ed students

*HS zoo classes

*HS science center classes

*HS children's museum classes

**HS Contig league (math game)

**HS Math Olympiad team

*HS Academic Leagues teams

**Cub Scouts

**Bible Club

**Church Camp

*Zoo Camp

*Volunteer for missionary organization

*Focus group for science center (with adults)

*Summer reading programs (activities - not just reading)

*Science Camp

*Assistant to his sister's therapists (PT, OT, ST)



That's all I can pull off the top of my head.  I'll add more if I think of them.

Oh yeah...

**HS Bowling

**HS Ice Skating

**HS Fishing

Answer 5

My kids are active in soccer and several different groups at church. They also have several neighborhood friends. I'm surprised that they actually do more with friends now, then they did when they were in public school.

Answer 6

Spot on about ballet, my daughter enjoys it but after 2 terms she doesn't even know the names of most of the girls in her class!

The home education group events are much better, a general weekly gathering on Mondays (which is free play with optional activities provided) and French lesson on Wednesdays (which is a half hour lesson followed by free play). I'd say in general anything which isn't too controlled by adults should be a good bet for real interaction and nothing beats letting them run wild for a bit.

Answer 7

Sorry for the repeats here ... but our experiences include

4-H

Speech club with social time afterwards

Student newspaper with social time after our meetings

Coop classes

Hiking / camping

Eating out with other kids

Bowling

Movies

Educational camps (LiveWire / Disney and a Duke TIP camp last year - Patrick Henry this year, we are looking at space camp)

Youth group

Community service such as Friends of the Library book sales

Parties at other homeschooler's homes

Answer 8

First and foremost, they have each other and us. That's a lot of interaction and social experience! Especially when they're being cranky with each other! ;) When you think about it, other than when they are silently absorbed in some work of their choosing, they are interacting with other people in the house; whereas in school, they'd be spending most of their time just sitting there. But I know what you're really looking for is interaction with people from outside the house.

Other things we do or have done:

*With homeschool groups or other homeschoolers*

-park days (lots of interaction)

-movie days

-field trips (lots of interaction)

-rec. centre visits

-workshops

-group sports lessons (like skiing)

-parties (birthdays, Christmas, Halloween, Valentine's, St. Patrick's Day, just because...; lots of interaction)

-playdates: there have even been themed playdates like Lego days or Barbie days, even one Hot Wheels day (lots of interaction)

*Not with homeschoolers*

-group music lessons

-lessons such as skating, swimming

-daytime summer camps (LOTS of interaction)

-family get-togethers (fairly frequent with our family; lots of interaction)

-parties

-they will be in soccer for the first time this summer; not sure about the interaction level

-sleepovers

-Sunday school

You know, those ballet lessons are very much like the interaction during school time: 20 kids together with little time spent interacting... The main interaction from ballet is before and after, just like class time in school. :) And, of course, those less social things can still lead to friendships that develop with other activities being done on the side with those people. If you want to allow that to happen, you need to make sure to leave enough time before-hand and enough time afterwards for the kids to interact with each other. Just thinking of my kids' swimming lessons--the kids who got there just in time all the time were the ones who lost out on connecting with other kids in the class. Being there with lots of time allowed my kids to chat it up with other kids in the class before the lesson started.

Answer 9

Well, I have to laugh because of your comment on ballet.  So many people think that being in a setting with 20 kids in the room (such as PUBLIC SCHOOL) equals socializing.  Atleast you realize what socializing is, and that it does not happen in that room.  It does, however, give the child an opportunity to make friends and socialize outside of that setting-such as inviting the child for a play date, birthday party, etc.

Anyway, my daughter is ten and my son is seven.  They have always been homeschooled.  They also have a six month old baby sister.

First, they are of course around their cousins and the children of our friends regularly.  This is one of the more social options.

While we do not have neighbors like most people do (we live in the country), most children can go outside and play with the other children in the neighborhood as well.  Our children love to go visit one set of neighbors, an older couple with grown children and grandchildren.  The neighbors on the other side is a family: preacher, wife who is a nurse, and their three children (they are all older teenagers).  Another neighbor is a friend of my husband's, and his son just recently moved back home after a divorce (he is a family friend as well).  The older couple recently built a cottage on their property to rent out for retirement income, and we have not met the new occupants of that yet.  Down the road is another couple who own cows and horses, we walk down there often to observe them.  The man was my husband's shop teacher in school.  My children speak to all of these neighbors, even though they are not children-and that is socializing.  

Church.  This is another highly social opportunity.  Our church has traditional services on Sundays and then a children's program on Wednesday evenings.  We often stay late while the children play with other children.

Scouts.  Both children are in scouts, and this is highly social.  They have time for free play, they do activities, etc.

Baseball.  Both children are on teams in our community.  I would not have thought that this would have been the social opportunity it is.  They (and my husband and I) have made new friends and met a lot of new acquaintances.  My son met his best friend-a private school student-at his first tee ball practice.  They just hit it off from "Hi, my name is...".

They have been in, are in, or will soon be in: Golf, Swimming, Tennis, Bowling League, Chess Club, Drama, Gymnastics, Karate.  These are some of the activities that were more "meet for the activity, and then it is over" for us, but they did make acquaintances and friends and had social experiences (such as dealing with bad behavior).

They are in 4H, another very social opportunity.

We visit the playground often, and if we are one in our small community they usually run into someone they know.  Whether we are at one near our home or one elsewhere, they always make new acquaintances.  

They attend camps, clubs, in our community.

We are in a support group with other homeschoolers.  They get together with others regularly for field trips, play dates, science fairs, spelling bees, etc.  VERY SOCIAL.

They also have the opportunity to socialize in the real world.  They speak to the librarian, the butcher, the doctor, the lady with the new baby in the line behind us at the store, the elderly man with us in the elevator, the mail man...

There is no lack of socialization amongst homeschoolers.  The term "home" school does not mean that they are at home all of the time.  We are busy out in the real world instead of just reading about it in books.  The home just serves as our base, much like the "homeroom" in public schools.

I hope this helps you, and I wish you must joy (and patience) on your homeschool journey.

Answer 10

My son takes art class, gym class and swimming lessons at the Y, attends a weekly playgroup that I created just for him, and we belong to a homeschool group. We also spend lots of time at the local playground. I time our visits there with the time that the Head Start kids are there, so he can interact with them. Once he is old enough I plan to sign him up for Cub Scouts and also gymnastics.

Answer 11

First, they play with others in the neighborhood.

Second, they play with kids at the park.

Third, they are members of a 130 member homeschool choir, so they interact some during choir, and a LOT after choir on the playground.

Fourth, they take some structured classes like dance and swimming which are fun.  Again, they meet kids this way and the playing progresses from there, not necessarily during class time!

Fifth, we get together with friends all the time, we hang out and visit while the kids play.

Sixth, I helped create a homeschool group in our area over 5 years ago now and many of her "best friends" come from that group.  

Finally, you can meet people all over the place, just like with dating, do things that you enjoy doing and you'll run into others with common interests.  

You DO have to make an effort to find playmates, they are not ready made from a classroom of 25 at school. But in doing that, it more accurately represents real life, where you have to work to keep friendships going.  I feel these friendships are more interest based rather than convenience based (i.e. neighbor or classmate that you see all the time just because they are there!) and will last many years.  

am still friends with 5 or 6 kids I went to school with, and those were all kids I had something in common with, not just friendship because of convenience.

Good luck and have fun!

Answer 12

Our very social groups include:

Boy scouts once a week, plus two weekends a month.

Girl scouts once a week

Cub scouts once a week

4H every other week

Library club every week

With our unschool group, park day once a month, craft day once a month, cooking class once a month, creative dance once a month, skating day once a month.

Did tae kwon do through the parks and rec department, twice a week. Very social, less rigid than professional groups, fifteen minutes of free play at the beginning to burn off energy.

Did band twice a week, again very social because they discussed every week as part of the class. Same for orchestra.

That doesn't include all the extra free time they have when their friends are out of school, so they pretty much play with neighborhood kids every day of the week.

Answer 13

Actually ballet & tap dancing, gymnastics and other sorts of classes are good because the child meets others with similar interests/experiences and they immediately have a topic of conversation to start with.  

Various classes & groups at the Y, figure skating lessons, ballet, gymnastics, town sports teams (Little League, etc) seem to work best for pre-school through high school.  Older kids gravitate to things like clubs like photography, computers, etc -- something where they have a common interest.  

And kids left to their own devices generally meet and start doing things with other kids, especially if you start early and do it often -- picnicking, shell collecting, sand castle building at the beach; camping; boating; fishing, etc.  Go anywhere other people with kids are!

Answer 14

I have soccer two nights a week plus games. I have baseball two night a week plus game. We go to a home-school co-op for some extra activities at least once every two weeks (I wish it were more).

Answer 15

We have homeschooled before, and the girls took dance classes, were in involved in church groups, did 4H club and took voice/drama lessons. Also, did a homeschool co-op group at one point.

We have also planned a lot of events here to encourage other kids to come and play here. Parties, game nights, pool parties, skating night, etc. Sometimes you have to work a little harder and be the family that plans to party. But most of the time, they all come!

Answer 16

She takes martial arts classes and goes to community chorus. But mostly she just runs with the neighborhood kids, goes to visit friends outside the neighborhood and visits family and has people over to play. She spends alot of time around adults and little kids too. I do not want her to become ageist, after all.