How http://www.senore.com/Cricket/Australia-c746 planned to ruin the Ashes celebrations for England
Ben Kingsley shouts “It’s not sudden. Preparation, Preparation, preparation,” about the one last job in the British movie
“s**y Beast”.
England finished their one last job in the Ashes series in Sydney on 7th January, 2011. Andy Flower, England’s ‘Paul the Octopus’ made sure that the players remained focussed to retain the urn and win the series. Flower,
along with Andrew Strauss tossed Twitter guidelines to the players. They even banned their families to accompany them to the land down under. The ladies were barred from tanning in the sun and going crazy in summer sales. However, the hard work surely paid
off as England won the Ashes series 3-1, humiliating Australia beyond belief. The key to the win was Her Majesty’s squad’s “fail to prepare, prepare to fail” mantra. And of course their very stylish and infamous sprinkler dance. This team was the most prepared
one in the pursuit of the Ashes glory on Australian soil.
The Aussies, well of course they were way too snobbish to accept any wrong doings in their clan. The Aussie media blasted England’s “boot camp” in http://www.senore.com/Cricket/Germany-c2904. The very sophisticated Englishmen bonded together around camp fires and roasted
marshmallows. Even though James Anderson got an injury due to a boxing session, however it sure was funny seeing http://www.senore.com/Cricket/Monty-Panesar-c2024 climbing the mountains while Kevin Pietersen laughed hard. It was amazing, seeing individual records being set in the series, yet
it brought tears to the eyes to see the close-knit squad ravel in the success. On the other hand, Australia had not been preparing at all. There were some early injuries, yet the Australian selectors proved an unmitigated disaster. They were overly commercialized
and announced a stupid 17 man squad. It was even more than the touring party’s squad.
The entire Australian population was included in the squad who even knew how to hold a bat and throw a red Kookaburra. There were unimaginable debuts of strange players with the only exception of the first Muslim to ever play for
Australia, http://www.senore.com/Cricket/Usman-Khawaja-c2729. The media got crazy over his 37 runs and this showed how desperate the Aussies were to find something positive in the Ashes series. Then there was Ricky Ponting’s jealousy over the sprinkler dance that ruled him out of the series.
He injured his pinkie while trying to practice the celebratory dance. He even picked up a fight with on-field umpire Aleem Dar, over some rejected appeal in the fourth Ashes Test. Ponting was so desperate for a win that he begged Dar to give the wicket to
them as a gift. Even though he was fined by the ICC, he still argued with Dar like a spoilt brat to grant him the dismissal. He always appeared fidgety in the field and was hapless with his form.
The Sydney Test was pretty in pink; however, the English players were the ones who looked pretty, especially “boy wonder” Alastair Cook. He had cooked up some records in the series and was awarded the prestigious Compton-Miller Medal.
However, the Aussie management and the team cooked up a mischief as they slumped to an innings and 87 runs defeat. They decided that if they could not win then the English will also be denied of the celebrations. The Barmy Army sledged their way as Andrew
Strauss and the team were hurried across the podium and were asked to lift the urn. The Aussies were so jealous that the series closing ceremony host, commentator Mark http://www.senore.com/Cricket/Taylor-c92915 “forgot” to announce the medal for Cook. Of course, it was not just a mere slip of
the brain; it was actually self induced amnesia. Poor Cook was slapped with the medal in the outfield with no media person in sight to capture the glorious moment. The organizers also magically forgot to mention an ode to Paul Collingwood, who announced his
retirement from Test cricket on the fourth day of the last Ashes Test.
Even the BBC Radio 4 cut off its live commentary as the last wicket of Beer was snatched. The broadcast was intervened by a “shipping weather forecast.” The English cricket fans immediately smelled a rat in the shape of the Aussies.
The bottom line is that the Australian cricket is in major crisis. However, they are still in denial.
Tags: