How Can I make my own decisions without having to feel like I'm asking my mother for permission?

Question

I know how to make my own decisions, the thing is when i make them my mother seems like i have disrespected her.

I'm 21 and I have a baby boy of age 13 months. I go to college and well my mom's single parent; well her and my brother are the ones working. my brother is 18. ok, my mother works during the day, meanwhile i watch her daughter of 7 and my son. at night i go to school, so she's watching my son, then.

i have NO INCOME what so ever and i've discussed with my mother that I WANT A JOB! but to her it seems like i don't want to watch my little sister. now, she doesn't pay my bills, so i'm in debt, unfortunate. she gets disturbed when i ask her to pay my cell phone bill ( THAT'S JUST MY CELL PHONE). and when i ask her for money to go shopping, she says she has no money.

also, when i ask her if she can watch my son while i go out w/my best friend for a few hours (maybe 3) she tells me to take my son w/me. BUT when she wants to go out I can't tell her the same because she'll tell me to leave or if i don't want to watch my sister to tell her upfront.

it's pretty messed up, but are there any places where i can stay to find my own place or a job where i can still live with mom but without her restrictions?

and people if you can't give an answer, don't type me anything at all. thanks. many just do it to get points, but how are you heping others?

Answer 1

That's the problem when you're living with somebody else, especially a relative to whom you do not pay rent. You have no choice but to accept her terms.

You don't want to do these things for her, so she retaliates by not paying your bills. It sounds like your only option is to find a job and move out.