How Do I Overcome My Eating Disordered Thoughts?

Question

I am trying to recover from anorexia, and i have been told that i need to gain weight or i will be put into the hospital involuntarily (i am 17, 5'4 and weigh 80lbs). I feel like half of me KNOWS that i need to gain weight. I haven't had a period in a year and i know this is starting to take a toll on my body and i know that if i dont gain weight, i could die. But the other half of me (my eating disordered thoughts) are telling me that i am fine and i don't need to gain weight. I was told to drink these Ensure Plus drinks with my meals to help me gain weight, and everytime i drink one, i end up feeling so guilty and disgusted with myself and i feel as if all the fat is collecting in my stomach. But part of me feels proud of myself because i know i need to do it. Is it normal to feel this way? I am so confused. How can i beat these thoughts of guilt and disgust that my eating disorder causes me to have?

Answer 1

heyy :)

i really dont want you to watch this if it is going to scare you! infact im not going to send you the link. but if you go onto youtube and type in anorexia and listern to peoples storys then it gets scary and you will realise that you DO infact need to eat. expecially if you are 17 and 80lbs :) i actually wish you ALL the best in the world about overcoming this.

really really if you want any support or need to talk to anyone you can always leave me a message!

all the best

xxxx

Answer 2

This is absolutely normal for someone who is recovering from Anorexia. Think of it this way. You are you, you're a beautiful young woman, who is being sabotaged by this horrible "it." Now, what you have to do, is not listen to this mysterious "it" who is trying to make you do all these bad things.

You're already on the way to recovery if you feel proud everytime you gain weight, or drink an ensure. Most girls suffering from aneorexia will not even get that feeling that they're doing something good. Just make sure you don't let this "'it" make you do something to lose any of the weight you've gained. High numbers=good.

If you want, I can help you set a goal. I'm 15, 5'5'' and weight about 130 lbs. I'm very average for someone of my height, and age. So now, Set your goal. Maybe try to be at least 95-100 lbs by the end of next month (that's only 15-20 lbs...I think you can do it). I you think that is too much then lessen it to 85-90 lbs by end of next months. It's all personal preference. Just make sure it's at least 5-10 lbs each month, to make sure your body can get back to it's normal functions.

I'm sorry to hear about your trouble, but  Iwish you all the luck the world has to offer.