How Do I Tell Them Shes not the right Horse?

Question

My Uncle Gave me a horse and She REALLY not the right horse for me, shes SUPER cute, but shes not trained at all and I want to be a show jumper, I can't train a horse myself and its to expensive where I live to get a horse trained. My mom already knows that I can't jump her(I did alot of thinkning, and I didnt say it that meanly)and she told my uncle , but now im afraid he's gonna get really mad at me. I just need a nice way to explain that I cant train a horse and shes not going to be the horse that takes me to the top.

ps-I'm not trying to sound mean and I always wanted my own horse, but I would rather wait and get my perfect one. I went through alot of crying and "stuff", this is just the quickest way I could put it. Im not that mean to say "I dont want your horse " without explaining why =P

also sorry about spelling I wrote this quickly =)

Answer 1

Talk to him first about your dreams and goals as far as horses go as a casual conversation. Then go on to talk about the horse he gave you. How much you appreciate it, how cute she is, etc. Finally tell him how you really like her but she can't be a show jumper because she isn't trained. Explain yourself. Figure out what kind of horse you want. Make suggestions. You might want to take lessons before you get a horse. Most good jumpers are thoroughbreds and aren't suitable for beginners.

She might actually prove to be able to jump. What breed is she? It isn't very hard to train a horse to jump. Teach her leg commands by using your legs the way you were taught while telling her a command. Well trained jumpers that will take you "all the way" are gonna be $30,000 easy.

Answer 2

Just tell them honestly, and I'm sure he'd understand. If you don't think you're capable of training the horse, then obviously it's not the right animal for you and she'd probably just end up ignored for that reason, so I'm sure that if he cares about the horse, then he'll be happy to know that you're responsibly waiting for the right one.

That said, are you sure you can't do it? Perhaps he could help you, or you could enlist the help of someone who knows how and could teach you? It could be a great bonding/learning experience, and no animal will ever be "perfect". They all require training to get them to suit you.

Answer 3

I think you should confront your uncle and tell him the truth. exactly wat you wrote up here...

Answer 4

I'm not trying to be mean but if you can't afford to have her trained, well then your in for a very long wait to get your "perfect horse".  And a jumper yet.  I would do some checking around, talk to some owners maybe they can give you some tips and she might be a great horse with training to at least get your "feet wet", before you do spend 10's or thousands of dollars on another horse.  Best of luck.

Answer 5

I don't think there's anything wrong with you not wanting her.  Horses generally make terrible surprise gifts, as your story illustrates.  Simply let your uncle know how much you appreciate all the trouble and expense he went to, but that you simply don't have the means, knowledge or experience to properly train her.  Being able to admit that is very responsible, and surely your uncle will recognize how much better it is that you admit she's "too much horse" (even if that is stretching the truth) than to leave things the way they are and not make a peep while the horse sits in the pasture day after day.

Don't feel bad, just make sure YOU get in on the next horse you think about buying instead of just your uncle!  Good luck.

Answer 6

if you can't find that perfect fit just yet, wait for it. look around at some nearby lesson barns to see if you can find a decent lease horse you could train with for a while.

or maybe, if you can't seem to find that just take lessons for a while and use your barn's horses at shows. trust me, i've 'made it to the top' as you say on a bratty 14.2 mare that wasn't wanted anymore by her owner and therefore became a advanced school horse. we showed together all last summer and took division champs at 4 shows.

just wait for the right mount to come along. and in the mean time, continue schooling yourself so you can have more options on the level of the horse you look for.

in lots of cases, girls just have to work together with their horses before they're the perfect team. you probably won't find a ready made horse perfect for you unless you're willing to empty your bank account.

Answer 7

Wow! The same thing happened to me! Someone offered to give me a REALLY great horse, cute, friendly, ex- Grand Pre jumper, but a little to experienced for me.  I planned on getting it had the date set up and then after a lot of thinkng i changed my mind and decided to wait for the perfect horse and now I have the love of my life dandy!!  So, just tell him the truth thats what i did and it all worked out!

Answer 8

you need to talk to him yourself and explain that you really super appreciate him giving you the horse but your personality doesn't match as well as you had hoped and that you need different qualities in a horse in order to fulfill your show dreams, and let him know that you aren't doing this to be un appreciative and its nothing personal at all, and you think what he did for you was very sweet but the horse just isn't for u, i hope this helps

Answer 9

Provided she is at least broke, where there is a will, there is a way. I am pretty sure that you could find another horse person in your area ( that perhaps cannot afford their own horse ) to help you. Read books, watch videos, anything you can get your hands on. You say that you want to be a showjumper, well this mare could be experience for you.

Anyway what would happen to her if your uncle gets rid of her?

Answer 10

Give the horse back to your uncle and be honest with him as to why.

Uncle Joe, I just love Trixie but she’s much more horse than I can handle right now. I’m still a novice and I need one that’s better schooled and easier for me to handle over jumps. Trixie is too green and I just don’t have the skills to train her, and can’t afford to have her professionally trained. I’m concerned that I’ll ruin her. I’m absolutely sick that I have to give her back – but in all honesty, It’s better that I give her back to you than to accept her and ruin her.

Uncle Joe will understand – and respect you for recognizing  your need for more experience in training a green horse.

Good luck.

Answer 11

Well, I am not aquainted with your uncle so I'm not sure.  However, if he is a real horseman then he should understand all about the business of owning the horse you want.  However, if you want another horse that is trained for jumping, he/she may be around 5-10,000 dollars himself.  So, if you are not wanting this horse because she is just not trained, then I suggest investing the money into her training when you get the chance.  I only advise that, though, if she is registered, bred to jump, and has a dispostion that you like.  If you get along fine, you may be suprised at how much you will learn to love her.  If you are even a little timid around horses, though, I suggest you get a dead-broke one.  I agree on the waiting part for an excellent horse, too.  To be brutally honest, though, if you are getting into horses ONLY because you want to use them as a sport accessory...you are setting yourself for trouble.  You have to deal with your horse on his good days, bad days, and if you don't have a passion for the horse, itself, you won't want to deal with it.  I'm not accusing you, though.  I'm just informing you just in case...for your own benefit, you know.  If you do really love horses, though, I suggest spending a little time with your unbroke horse to see if theres chemistry.  If there isn't, then I would suggest saving up for an awesome dead-broke horse.  A recommendation for a first-time horse owner would be to invest in a quarter horse.  They can do anything and everything...and they are eager to please!  If you have any more questions, feel free to ask.  I'm here to help! :o)

Answer 12

well, if you cant train her, you cant train her. your not sounding mean, its not the fact you dont want her, you just cant train her, theres no reason he should get mad. just tell him you dont know how to train her and you cant afford a trainer, like you said. its not mean, you werent trained on how to teach her this sport.