How Do I get Over This ( Same Question, Bug Update.)?

Question

Just reposted this. This original question is first and the updated part is at the end.

I've been posting these questions about my girl getting pregnant from another guy and me and her trying to work it out. Well, after a couple of days of trying to convince her that this would still work, she was still not sure. Her main reason was, she couldn't look me in the face knowing that she screwed up and I'm fathering another man's child. She doesn't want to keep hurting me for her mistake. She seems like the only reason she doesn't want to get through this is cause of how I might feel later on, and how weird it would be for me. I love this woman to death, so I know I could get through this. But last night, I told her maybe I needed to do the right thing and walk away from her. She started crying and agreed how difficult things could be for me. But said she still loves me dearly and wishes it's my baby and wish we could start a family together. I kinda get mixed signals. Should i walk away? Should I stay and keep going through with this? Her cheating was partly my fault, so I don't hold it against her. And how do you go about getting over someone you love so much, but you got pulled away from? She was comming back and working things out and the pregnancy just killed all that.

UPDATE UPDATE

I went to talk with her right now on her lunch. And tried to be as straight forward as possible. She told me she thinks she needs to be with the baby's father and see if it could work out. She needs to at least try. I told her, before she realized she was pregnant, she wanted to work on our relationship and making it work, and a baby shouldn't change where here heart is. Right? I mean, she looked kinda unsure what she wanted, but this is the first time in a week she said anything that resembled a straight answer. Not sure if she is confused or holding back the honest truth so she doesn't hurt me anymore. She's still living with me at the moment. We still cuddle up and sleep and talk together in bed. She still hugs me like there no tomorrow. She get teary eyed everytime we talk. Sometimes she even burst into tears and start shaking. Am I fighting a battle I cant win?

Answer 1

be strong and walk away.  you're only torturing yourself.  let her go be with the baby's dad.

i don't think you will be happy if you decide to stay.

it's tough, but it's the right choice leaving her.

Answer 2

I think you are her security blanket at the moment. I dont know if shes using you or very scared and confused. It sounds like you are now friends rather than lovers. You need to let her go so she can figure it out. If you still want her back then take her back if thats what she decides but you need to be true to yourself. What if the real love of your life walks in and you are too busy looking out for her return. Tough call but its time to let her go - dont be a pig about it as she is obviously already feeling cr*p but i also wouldnt be her blanky for the next 9 months.

Answer 3

i don't understand why would you be with someone who doesn't love you if she did she wouldn't have cheated let her be there are plenty of other fish in the sea  

Answer 4

walk away from this.  I agree with the others.  She wants to keep you on the hook in case things don't work out with the baby's daddy.

I bet she didn't get pregnant on accident.  I'm betting she was hoping the baby's daddy would be willing to try a relationship with her if she were pregnant with his baby.

I'm sorry that you are hurting, but she chose to be with someone else.  You are not who she wants but you are what she will settle for until she meets someone else she wants to be with and walks away from you with her (not your) baby.

Answer 5

this is hard one.... and there is no right or wrong answer to this...



i can understand her point wanting to work it out w/ the real baby's dad b/c she wants to make sure the dad is in the baby's life.

On the other hand you are right about how can she want to work on your relationship beforehand and now with this mistake everything changes. well feelings don't change that fast. i betting on that she feels extremely guilty and cant handle the shame, but hopefully that will pass sometime soon. because if your still willing to be there for her and the baby than all you can do it talk talk talk and make her understand.

Sit her down and tell her before its too late. I'm sure you guys can work out having the baby's dad in its life.  

Answer 6

I said it earlier and more proof SHE IS USING YOU.... She wants to be with the babies daddy, but hold onto you just in case it doesn't work.  You do not deserve to be someones second choice.  she has made her decision move on and out.