How Formula 1 fans want the 2011 Formula 1 season to be
Just like everyone has been saying, the 2010 Formula 1 season was exhilarating, dramatic, and unpredictable and the only thing left was Teletubbies jumping around as cheerleaders at each venue (or maybe not). But of course, the 2010 season had everything
a Formula 1 fan dreams of watching in a single season and it was the most entertaining Formula 1 season of this decade. However, do we all really think that the 2010 season had “everything” in it?
Let’s begin with the usual boring technical talk which no one cares about (except me). KERS was banned for 2010 after being introduced in 2009 and it seemed that with no “boost power”, racing might not be as entertaining as it used to be (especially for
people who play video games). But that was covered up by a device that McLaren introduced by the name of the “F-duct”. However, the most surprising and annoying rule change made by the FIA was that there will be no fuelling strategies anymore. That was quite
harsh and most diehard Formula 1 fans must’ve cried after hearing this. But Bernie doesn’t care now does he?
FIA recently revealed that KERS will be allowed in 2011 so hurray! But they still did not state anything about refuelling. Refuelling added an extra flavour to Formula 1 as it was always a surprise to see some teams running on a two pit strategies while
they were expected to run a 3 pit strategy and what not. That way, the drivers running at the back also had a chance of recovering and that is the only reason why drivers used to recover from even the 24th place to 3rd or even 1st
place in the past. While in 2010, overtaking 4-5 top running cars was considered an impossible task. Yes, it saves a lot of fuel (maybe) and makes the world a better place for us but it has definitely affected the unpredictability level of the sport.
Other than these technical changes, the fans would love to see Sebastian Vettel with one of the Spice Girls hopefully (even though some of them are his mother’s age). Now that would be a shocker now wouldn’t it? It would add some more “spice” to the sport.
Lewis Hamilton and Jenson Button will have some challenges in the pit lanes and it would be great if we get to see a cat fight every now and then as well.
It would be a great sight to see a “p***y cat doll” fight with a “Spice Girl” and as a result, Formula 1 would become an rated “R” sport (Bernie is going to love this idea). Other than that, it would be great to see Fernando Alonso with a teddy bear at each
weekend just in case he gets all cranky. Felipe Massa does not need anything but luck and Stefano Domenicali by his side. "For sure i will defeat Fernand and Michael and maybe all the Rally drivers as well while I am at it."
Jenson Button should come up with a device known as “the diaper” in case he gets scared but needs to make a crucial overtake. It would definitely suite the McLaren of Jenson Button and some other drivers who are facing this problem. The best thing about
it would be, it doesn’t weigh much either (depends on how the drivers plan to use it).
Michael Schumacher, my old friend, should bring a taser with him in case Ross Brawn changes his mind and decides to give Nico Rosberg more preference. Nico Rosberg on the other hand should simply bring a cameraman with him to keep Michael busy and take all
the glory.
Mark Webber is expected to bring a new device with him that he plans to call “the lie detector”. That device is expected to be used on Christian Horner and Adrian Newey quite frequently in 2011. But Christian Horner would be one step ahead as always as he
would have a piece of paper that we all call a contract. It does not require much force to tear it up but the aftermath that follows is definitely quite forceful.
After taking a look at the sport from every possible angle, it seems that Formula 1 will become, if it were up to Bernie Ecclestone “an all girls race”. That would resolve everything and take Formula 1 to the next level.
(The quotations and comments above are the writers creation and solely for the purpose of adding hilarity to the article)
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