How about if I stay in today?

Question

Inside Looking In

If the choice is mine

If the voice is mine

I choose not to speak

I’m hurting oh so much

I’m yearning for the touch

I choose not to step out

Today I don’t feel like feeling

Today I can’t deal with dealing

I choose not to open my eyes

As the pain takes control

As the rain drowns my soul

I choose not to look in

Here I sit pen to my heart

Here I lay no way to start

I choose not to face me

So I stare left of the mirror

So I care not to see things clearer

I choose not to choose.

©rad071608

Answer 1

You're allowed to stay in and not to choose is valid. (My therapist said this a long time ago)

But I hope you'll choose to come out again, you are truly missed when you stay in.

Answer 2

You choose not to speak,

  Silence, You Seek.

Your Pain is Unbearably High.

You Yearn for the Touch,

That you Miss so much,

Yet Each thing your offered, Denied.

Your Eyes remain Closed,

To shut out All those,

That you Inadvertently Dread.

Have you not gathered

The Heart that was shattered

Once more would like to be fed.

There is no shame in trying to find blame,

For  People, that you Loved and you Lost.

But Think just one moment,

Would they want to see you,

Alone and Bearing the Cross.

Look for Tomorrow, another New Day,

Where All you have been, will remain,

The things that count most,

Are those that are close,

And Want so, your Love to obtain.

So Before you shut the Windows

And Lock All of Life's Doors,

Think To Yourself,

How you ARE Loved,

And so obviously,.... Much Adored.

Answer 3

This is so revealing and hauntingly personal that I am deeply touched by your candor and courage.  I can relate so well at this time in my life when I am adrift.  It becomes so overwhelming at times that I wind into the pain and shut myself away from the world, and this is how I perceive the title..."Inside Looking In".  I appreciate your honesty .  Thank you.

Answer 4

This is good; sad, but good. I really like how you continue about the choice, how you describe the pain and agony. You chose the right things to use as descriptions: the mirror, the pen, and drowning. I can feel the emotion, I'm feeling the emotion! Continue on writing!!

Answer 5

This is one of the best poems I've read here on Yahoo. Most of them are sh*t, so this was a really pleasant change. Thanks for sharing so deeply of yourself.

Answer 6

If this is the kind of stuff you write when you stay in, I'd suggest you get out more,