How am I supposed to leave my son with complete strangers?

Question

I'm a stay at home mom. I have to go back to work. There's no way around it. My problem is I'm going to have to put my 8 month old son in day care or take him to a certified sitter. I don't personally know anyone that could watch him full time. So basically I'd be leaving him with strangers. It sickens me to have to leave him. But it's financially impossible to continue not working. How do I get over my fears, worries and doubts about leaving him with certified people while I return to work to make a living? Friends and family have recommended the daycare and sitters to me but I myself don't personally know them.

Answer 1

I had a really hard time before my son was even born with this issue.  I know I had to go back to work but was very apprehensive about leaving my child with a stranger.  I did a lot of interviewing and when I finally chose a care provider i spent some quality time with her to get to know her as a person and her care giving style.  We formed a great relationship that way and I felt completely comfortable leaving my son when the time came.  My advice would be to just really get to know whoever it is our leaving your child with that way your not really leaving him with a "stranger"  this also helped later when it came time to making decisions about my son's development, we were on the same page as far as what he should eat, when the bottle should be taken away, how many naps he should have etc......I wish you the best, I know it's hard, you will both be fine and I'm sure your child will love being around other children.  Take care!

Answer 2

With a lot of research and visits, you'll know the right place for your son!

I had to also go back to work because of financial reasons, but she was only 6 weeks when she went into daycare.  At times, I think this made things easier for me because I didn't stay home for a really long time with her than have my whole life change by sending her to daycare!  I knew from the beginning, she would be going to daycare at 6 weeks because we have no close family or friends that we rely on that live close to us.

I called and checked out all types of daycare.  I posted my own ads on craigslist, called babysitters, large daycare centers, small daycare centers, and in home daycares.

We finally went w/ an in home daycare, for these reasons: we felt like she was going to get more one on one time, but still have others to socialize with.  It was affordable, and I got a very comfortable feeling everytime I went there.  Even now, I can tell she is comfortable being there.  It makes working a lot easier!

Good luck with what you decide!  

Answer 3

We've all been in this situation. With my daughter i couldn't afford a daycare center so i had to pick someone i found off the internet, but what i did was went and met this person and checked out her home and how many other kids she had and what ages they were and talked and asked a bunch of questions. first impressions mean everything and if you are not feeling some type of trust within the time frame you are there meeting someone then forget it, don't do it. My daughter jumps out of my arms to be with her, she loves it there!! Just meet several and then make your decision, it's a fear that will haunt you until you know your child enjoys it and it will take some time for your son to get used to it, but if after a month he's still crying or throwing a fit to go to this person then i would question why and possibly stop taking him there. It took my daughter roughly 4 weeks to warm up to the idea but now, she loves this lady....my daughter is 1 and has been going there for 3 months now!! If you absolutely know it'll be too hard for you, do you have means to watch kids yourself?? There's some decent money in it, you could do it at home and post it on the internet, child care is needed like crazy right now...just an idea. Just shop around and be extra extra careful!!!!  

Answer 4

Get to know them. Go on the recommendations of your family, and visit each of the recommended places. Create a list of questions and concerns (just  read the q&a on this site with references to daycare and babysitting, and you'll get an idea of what behaviors and expectations you have of the ppl who will care for your little one. -- and what you don't want them to be doing). Then spend the day with your little one at the centers of your choice, and observe how the caretakers interact with their charges. Don't settle with a place that you're not comfortable with.  

Answer 5

awwww, I know how you feel. Its so hard to have to leave your precious baby. I was in a similar situation as you a few years ago, although Im currently a stay at home mom I know that its just not possible sometimes. The only thing I can say to make you feel better is that I used to work at a daycare and I loved those babies like they were my own. Myself and the other girl who was with me played with them, and loved them and gave them the best care we could just as if they were our own because we knew how tough it was for the parents to leave every morning and we wanted them to have peace of mind that their child was loved and well taken care of. My only advice is to definately go with recommended centers...word of mouth goes a long way. Take a tour of it first and interview the childcare givers that will be looking after your son, I know we were glad to talk with parents and even expected it for a new children. I know it will be tough but it will get better , just find a place you love and feel comfortable with. Good luck and I hope everything works out for you!