How appropriate would it be to ask my mother for my child support?

Question

I don't mean to sound ungrateful, that isn't my intention.

I'm 17 and my mother has set rules for me - when I can and can't use my computer/TV, when I can and can't use the telephone; as a means to save up money that would otherwise go to the electricity/telephone bills. On top of that, I'm giving her $100 a month from my job, to pay for my expenses. I barely have enough money leftover from work to buy things that I need - clothes, shoes, books, etc., because I'm saving up most of the money for college. Most of the money my father gives my mother goes to other things, things that have nothing to do with me - her clothes, things for her significant other. Getting her to buy me something that I need for school when I'm low on money is like pulling teeth.

I don't want to be selfish. Any advice?

I posted this in the Family section, but thought I should get some advice here as well. Thanks.

Answer 1

If you have a relationship with your Father you should tell him what is going on.  He can request that the court ask for an itemised statement of where the money is spent.  This is hard and takes time and since you are 17 it will most likely not take place before you turn 18.  I feel that when Child support is set in place that it should also be a requirement for the parent with custody to furnish the court an itemised statement of where the money is spent $ for $.  I am sorry for what you are going through.  I don't think asking your Mom for your child support is going to do any good because it seems as though she doesn't have your best interest at heart.

I am a female that raised 2 daughters all by myself.  Their Father did not pay one dime of child support, but if I would have received child support I would have been more than happy to show where the money went to.

Answer 2

Ok, my answer would have been different if you had said that your mother was using the child support for mortgage and food. But she is not.

That money is called child support for a reason. If she wanted money for her self, she should have sued your father for alimony.

She technically is taking your money and that isn't right. I can understand her rules for paying bills, but like i said, the child support is yours if she isn't using it to benefit you. (keeping a roof over your head, feeding you, etc) .

I would talk to her about it and see what she says. If your not satisfied, i honestly would tell your dad. Maybe your dad then can go to the lawyer and see if he can hand the money directly to you. I could be wrong, i don't know, but my defintiion of Child Support is money for the kids.

Answer 3

That money from your Father is to support you...things you need...such as food clothing shoes, books, etc.  Can you contact your father and talk to him about it??  She is taking advantage of your father's money for you for her own gain.  Plus takiong money from you for room and board.  You could refuse to pay hr room and board and try and re coup some money from your father's chil support.

Answer 4

Your Mom pays for the home you live in, the food you eat, the health insurance,home owners insurance, taxes, taxes, taxes !

She pays for the heat to keep you warm in the winter.

Gas is outrageous now.It takes $50 to fill my small car.

Your Mom takes you to the doctor,pays for any pets you have and repairs to the home.

When you are 18, move on out and have all the time you want on the computer/tv and so on.Good luck paying for it.

Answer 5

My daughter had to start paying me $25 every two weeks to help with the car insurance.  No, it didn't totally cover her portion that it went up when we added her BUT it taught her responsibility.  Pay your bills first before you get to play.  Helped her manage her money and made her realize that calling in at work to play was going to cost her money in her pocket.  

She also totalled the first car she was driving, which used to be my old car and I did give it to her (97 Toyota) It was not her fault at all (she was rear ended)  Anyway, the money received for the totalled vehicle was not enough to cover the FULL amount on the new car she picked out (another used 98 Saturn) so we put all of it towards it and there about $2,000 still owed.  Because she was 17, we had to put the car in my name BUT she made $200 a month payments for 10 months  and paid it off herself. NEVER once asked for my help.  I was soooooo PROUD of her.

BTW, I get Child Support....poverty level child support because my EX is a LOSER....$200 a MONTH for @ children.  CRAZY I know....but I just wanted out and I'm fine with it.  It leaves him money to spend on the kids when they are with him anyway.   There have been months that I really needed that $200 BUT I have also split it and given each child $100 that they HAD to use for school clothes.