How can I, an introvert, connect with people on a deeper level?

Question

I often feel very "closed off" and introverted towards people. I like hanging out with people, and I'm usually relaxed and comfortable, but I just find it difficult to open up and come out of my shell. I've been like this for years, and a few close friends have pointed it out. It usually isn't too much of a problem, but I do find it a tad more difficult to connect with people than extroverts would.

How can I, an introvert, connect with people on a deeper level?

Answer 1

give in to having shallow conversations about subjects you don't care about with people you aren't interested in.

it's hard but trying to make yourself shallow will aid in reversing the introspective nature

Answer 2

Go see a psychiatrist and stop diagnosing yourself. I am sure the doctor will come up with a more suitable label to pin on your sleeve. Me Me Me.

Answer 3

Wow, well that is a serious philosophical cunundrum. First of all, you should know that you have nothing to fear from other people, and that being shy seems to be a rare thing these days. (I am very shy myself and find myself more at ease with other people who are shy and don't go to fast for me) It is very likely that you are simply the type of person that needs to know people a little bit better before you can comfortably allow yourself to relate to them.  Try giving yourself more one on one opportunitites, or better yet, have someone you are comfortable with along with you when you are meeting knew people. That will help take the stress off of you. And it is okay if you don't click with everyone. You didn't do anything wrong, sometimes people fit better with some than others. That's normal.

The best advice I can give you is this: Get a brand new hobby that you really enjoy. Try scuba diving, or learning a new language or cooking.  Then when you meet someone that has an interest in those things, you will have lots to talk about and break the ice.  Once you have had that opportunity to feel each other out, you can decide if you want to exchange more personal or revealing information.

Remember that you have something of value in yourself. You are at least thoughtful enough to ask a question like this, and that is a good start. =) And do your best not to make your shyness your identity. (i.e. Hello, it's nice to meet you, I'm really shy) If you cling to hard to this as your identity, you will be uncomfortable with change. Be brave, and remember,  Blessed are the meek, right?  =) You'll do great!

Answer 4

I'm an introvert too, but I don't even have any friends.  Just tell them that you're different than them.  Everyone's different.  As long as you're all nice to each other, that's what matters.