How can I be more confident?

Question

I am not a very confident person. I have heard you can become confident by faking that you are. What body language, things you say, clothes etc make you appear this way? Thanks

Answer 1

Some tips for you:

*  Be aware of negative self-talk.  That is the mental commentary in your mind, which can talk you into a bad state of confidence.  Tell yourself that you are CONFIDENT, WORTHY, GOOD ENOUGH and that PEOPLE REALLY TAKE TO YOU.  Do this often and you will feel a difference.  Change your bottom line belief that you are not a very confident person to I AM EVER-MORE CONFIDENT.  Say this to yourself often.

*  Visualise yourself succeeding.  In your mind's eye, place yourself in a situation where you think you will fail...but instead. picture yourself succeeding in that situation.  Create 'movies' in your mind of yourself passing the interview, getting the girl/boy, being confident around other people, getting whatever you ask for, saying no and meaning it, and so on.  Again, if you do this often, you will begin succeeding and feeling a difference.

*  Expect a POSITIVE OUTCOME.  Lack of confidence can stem from thinking that other people will be horrible or unobliging to you.  You may be expecting that the boy/girl you are romancing will think you are stupid, or that your boss might be in a foul mood with you, but 99% of people in this world are GOOD-NATURED AND VERY DECENT.  Often, if you approach people in a way which is positive and good-natured yourself, then they will respond in kind.

*  Practice walking upright (not slouching) looking at the world around you, and taking purposeful strides.  These are the hallmarks of confident body language.

*  If you are talking to someone, try and take an interest in that person.  Find out what their interests are, ask leading questions and soon.  If you give out the idea to another person, that you like them and find them interesting, they will be very enthusiastic to talk to you.

*  As for clothes, have a clear out.  Root through your wardrobe, and throw out any clothes which are baggy, faded, or which have just 'lost their sparkle.'  This can be quite liberating in itself, then nip into town or to the shopping centre and visit a fashion emporium.  Fashionable clothes aren't that expensive, especially if they are sold in outlet centres.  Get in some fashionable clothes which APPEAL TO YOU, and which you think will FIT YOU WELL.  A good fit is as confidence-creating as something which looks good.  This can be part of a 'new look' for you.

*  If you are an eccentric person and you dress outlandishly, then buy inthose kinds of clothes.  Being yourself is the most harmonious feeling you can have, and people like eccentrics (and people who are being themselves) because they are happy, cheerful, non-judgemental and amusing to be with.

*  Lastly, lots of unconfident people think that there is something wrong with them, that is why they feel distant from others, but let me tell you that there are PLENTY OF THINGS WHICH ARE RIGHT WITH YOU.  Make a long list of your positive qualities, and then remind yourself of these things often.  You are UNIQUE, and these are what make you YOU.  It would be very boring if we were all the same, so show the world who you are.

WHEN YOU LOVE YOURSELF AND APPRECIATE WHO YOU ARE, YOU ATTRACT PEOPLE WHO APPRECIATE YOU.

It may seem like you are faking it at the start, but that is because you have been feeling the other way for so long that it feels strange.  After a while though, confident and self-accepting feelings will feel like second nature to you, and you will wonder why you didn't like yourself before.

Good luck my friend

Answer 2

Tricky one. I'm not very confident either. Just avoid the temptation to look down.

Answer 3

NO! Jesus Christ!

Thats not what we want! Thats what a magazine tells you, men dont look for any kind of major confidence in women, its a hoax! totally false information!

Do not ready beauty magazine writtn by g*y people, they dont have a clue how to run a straight relationship!

All we look for (Men) is a nice decent girl, and never something that is pretending to be something she's not, we move in th opposite direction. These girls may think thir pretty but after a short while, they (some) relise that men do not want wax statues! we dont like fake plastic looks, and anything that looks like plastic isnt too attractive is it?

Dont listen to stupid magazine, they havent got the slightest ideas!