How can I continue to be a good catholic?

Question

I have been dealing with my husband looking at pornography for years, I'm constantly telling him to change the radio/t.v. if something I don't think is suitable is on, (for us or the kids) or s*x life is getting a little strange.....I do pray about it, but I'm getting exhausted....I feel like it's a never ending battle, that I'm about ready to give up on.....I don't know what to do. He also suffers from erectile dysfunction, I feel like my job as a mother and wife is just getting harder and harder.....I can't keep everyone happy, if I'm not being kept happy....

Answer 1

Find something that you like doing, and do it.

This will serve as a start to get you out of your rut.

Answer 2

You should not let your husband's lack of righteousness keep you from being faithful to your beliefs.  I am not a Catholic, so I'm not sure what all is involved in being a "good Catholic" but I do know that pornography is an evil that will become very addictive to anyone who participates in viewing and practicing it.  Pornography destroys individuals and can, and has, destroyed families.

I would recommend that you talk with your husband about getting counseling about the porno issue.  Refuse to participate in his pornographic fantasies.  Get some help from a reliable source rather than this site that is filled with hate, perversion, and un-Christlike responses.

Answer 3

More important, "how can I be a better person?"  Titles mean absolutely nothing, no offense to you or your religion.  Believe me, God won't be offended by this.  :)

Once someone drops their title, they have a much better chance of getting in touch with their Original Self.  You'll find the world a much better and easier place to live in once you have gotten your Original Self back.  It will even have an effect on those around you.

The more someone is chastised for what they do, no matter what it may be, the more they will do it, I've seen this happen in my own family....  Once the matter is no longer made an issue of, it will eventually fizzle out on its own because no one is adding fuel to the fire anymore.  It no longer packs a punch to those who have been supposedly enjoying it.  Try leaving him alone with it entirely, and begin taking care of yourself, it is your birth right, it is his birth right as well to take care of himself, but sharing can be the common factor, not co-dependency.

It isn't up to you to get everyone to stand on their own two feet, once you stop trying to do this it will have to be up to them to stand on their own two feet, otherwise it could be crippling to constantly want to do for them what they themselves should be doing on their own.

My point is, begin with yourself, it isn't selfish, on the contrary, it will give everyone else the chance to do the same, take responsibility for themselves and in turn gain much self esteem and confidence because of it.

We are all put here with the built in ability to stand on our own two feet, it is up to us to engage in those capabilities, and in doing so it will give others a chance to do the same.....

Take care.  :)

Answer 4

I don't even think religion enters into it. Bottom-Line: Put your foot down about the pornography. You have to make him listen. Why should he need p**n if he has a wife?

As for inappropriate viewing on TV for the kids, remind him often to be more mindful of what he's exposing the children to.

As for the erectile dysfunction... there's a pill for that.

It's impossible to keep everyone happy all the time. You just do what you gotta do. Sometimes, things call for real action on your own part.

Answer 5

Read the life of St.Monica. Pray to her, she is the Patron St. of difficult Marriages. Once you read her life, you will view your own as something of a picnic.

I know who wants to hear, "oh pray about it some more" but really you love your husband you wouldn't have agreed to spend the rest of your breathing life glued to him, I am sure talking about it with him is probably pretty stale too, so I would say the only thing you can do is look to the example of someone who has been through it before. St.Monica can help you. I am sure of it. Also try St.Joseph, he never fails to answer and it always works out best when the Patron St.of Fathers intervenes on the Mothers behalf, which He does.

God's time is way different then our time and as the prayer say Thy will not my will.  

Answer 6

Just sing him this song, which was approved by the Vatican:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=U0kJHQpvg...

Answer 7

It seems trite to say PRAY ABOUT IT but laboring before God about this matter is a good option because He can and will answer your prayers !!! Keep your mind open for answers from unexpected sources !!! We will pray for you !!! Pray the Lord's prayer very slowly with your mind set on your request !!!

Answer 8

It sounds like yuor husband is the one that needs to try and be the good Catholic, not you. If its so bad that its hurting you and affecting your home, children included, tell him he needs counseling or consider leaving him.  

Answer 9

keep praying. everytime you go to Mass ask God to help your husband. Everytime you pray the Rosary and the Divine Mercy Chaplet ask God to touch your husband's heart that he may change for the better. Don't ever give up praying. Prayer is the most powerful weapon against the secular world that we have! i know it can be hard praying for someone who needs them most but it's in praying for them that we do the most good. Turn to God in troubled times. Put your troubles into His hands and ask Him to help you. God Bless. email me anytime you need a friend.

Answer 10

Go to Mass as often as you can. Go to confession at least once a year.

Answer 11

You should also pray to Saint Raphael The Archangel:

St. Raphael is the angel of charity and consolation, healing, separation and parting.   St Raphael is helper in need and affliction.   Like his pure love our hearts should fly like darts into the heart of God and remain there.   St. Raphael helps us to distinguish between pure love and selfish, possible love.   "Charity is ready to excuse, trust, hope and endure what ever comes.   Love does not come to an end" (1- Cur. 13, 7).   Pure love is the bond of the Holy Ghost who encompasses the Father and the Son.   St. Raphael brings the power of pure love from which everything comes.   He and his companions are the defenders of the Sacrament of the Holy Ghost, the Confirmation.   Because he is the protector of confirmation and servant to the Holy Spirit he wears a red garment burning with love.

St. Raphael accompanied the young Tobias on his journey, as recorded in the Old Testament.   He is the patron of travelers, doctors, youth, married couples and priests.   He obtains the gifts of Wisdom, Understanding, Knowledge, Counsel, Fortitude, Piety and Fear of the Lord.   St. Raphael should be invoked on important decisions, journeys, operations, and also against poisons and medicines, against wrong or bad decisions and difficulties of the heart.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~Prayer~~~~~~~~~

Vouchsafe, O Lord God, to send unto our assistance Saint Raphael the Archangel: and may he, who, we believe, evermore standeth before the throne of Thy Majesty, offer unto Thee our humble petitions to be blessed by Thee.   Through Christ our Lord.   Amen

"Oh, Glorious St. Raphael Archangel,

Come with your companions

Multiply your strength and love in us

Let the love of God and Our Lady triumph in our hearts

And so over come hatred and impurity in the world." Amen.

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Praying to all seven Archangels is very Help full also:

With the Virtue of Humility we overcome pride and conceit, to truly except our nothingness, and worthlessness, for with out God we are nothing.   Through Lucifer's pride and arrogance he lost everything! St. Michael in his unshakable faith in God called on the faithful angels and descended on Lucifer.  St Michael fought with the power given to him by Almighty God.   He Hurled Lucifer and his followers into the infernal abyss and transformed him into the horrid dragon, the ancient serpent.   St. Michael was in charge of the fight at the beginning and will be in charge at the final end and under the command of Mary, his Queen.   He is also the defender of the sacrament of Extreme Unction.   We should call him and his faithful followers to help the dying.   St. Michael was the angel of protection to the Israelites and is now the patron Saint of the Holy Roman Catholic church.   Pope Leo XIII saw in his vision the wrath of Satan against the Church in the future and how St. Michael and his followers will defend the Holy Church in the future.   Because of this the Pope composed a powerful prayer to St. Michael.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~Prayer~~~~~~~~~

O glorious Prince of the heavenly host, Saint Michael the Archangel, defend us in the battle and in the fearful warfare that we are waging against the principalities and the powers, against the rulers of this world of darkness, against the evil spirits.   Come thou to the assistance of men, whom Almighty God created immortal, making them in his own image and likeness and redeeming them at a great price from the tyranny of Satan.   Fight this day the battle of the Lord with thy legions of holy Angels, even as of old thou didst fight against Lucifer, the leader of the proud spirits and all the rebel angels, who were powerless to stand against thee, neither was their place found any more in heaven.   And that apostate angel, transformed into an angel of darkness who still creeps about the earth to encompass our ruin, was cast headlong into the abyss together with his followers.   But behold, that first enemy of mankind, and a murderer from the beginning, has regained his confidence.   Changing himself into an angel of light, he goes about with the whole multitude of the wickedspirits to invade earth and blot out the Name of God and of Christ, to plunder, to slay and to consign to eternal damnation the souls that have been destined for a crown of everlasting life.   This wicked serpent, like an unclean torrent, pours into men of depraved minds and corrupt hearts the poison of his malice, the spirit of lying, impiety and blasphemy, and the deadly breath of impurity and every form of vice and iniquity.   These crafty enemies of mankind have filled to overflowing with gall and wormwood the Church, which is the Bride of the Lamb without spot; they have laid profane hands upon her most sacred treasures.   Make haste, therefore, O invincible Prince, to help the people of God against the inroads of the lost spirits and grant us the victory.   Amen

"Oh, glorious St. Michael,

Chief and commander of the heavenly army

Teach us to be faithful to God during this darkness, teach us to fight with your humility

Teach us to carry on in silence and obedience to God

Teach us to love and be faithful like Mary! Amen."

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St Gabriel is the messenger of God's Providence, the attendant of miracles and divine Mysteries.   When we are over come with doubts, when it seems to us that we have been abandoned by everyone and there is no help from anywhere, so let us pray to St. Gabriel, that by his prayers the lord would reveal to us His most holy will and would set our life upon the course of salvation.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~Prayer~~~~~~~~~

O God, who amongst all the Angels didst choose the Archangel Gabriel to announce the mystery of Thine Incarnation; mercifully grant, that we who solemnly keep his feast on earth may feel the benefit of his patronage in heaven: who livest and reignest for ever and ever.   Amen

"Oh, glorious St. Gabriel Archangel,

Come to our assistants, with your heavenly choirs!

Help us to become faithful servants of God

Help us to be pure and sincere, and to over come doubt

Help us to live united to Our Lord and His Holy Mother Mary. Amen.

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We ask St Uriel, to free us from the fall in to the passion of hatred, impatience and the wrath "anger", to protect us from evil people, to surround us with the love of God, and spill in to our heart and soul, meekness and patients, which Our Lord showed to us while on earth.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~Prayer~~~~~~~~~

"Oh, glorious St. Uriel Archangel,

Surround us with your ring of fire

Come to our aid with your heavenly army, and teach us to be humble, patient and meek

of heart, bring the fire of love in to us so that our hearts will be a blaze for the love of

God and Mary, and teach us to be like Our Lord when he was still on earth." Amen.

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Lucifer and his apostate angels protested and objected to the position given to Mary, who was to be the mother of the only begotten Son of the Father.   There envy turned into hate against the decrees of Almighty God.   During exorcism the second highest principle demon "Beelzebub" has, himself to be known as the opponent to St Jehudiel.   Envy begrudges the good to our neighbor.   Because of envy the brothers of Joseph wanted to kill him, who was Jacob's favorite son (Gn. 37. 20).   Jacob's sons hatred turned to revenge, and they killed Hamor and his son Shechems, and all the men in the town, by the sword, after they being circumcised  (Gn. 34. 24, 27).   Envy blinded the Pharisees against the holiness and power of miracles of Our Lord.   Their envy turned into hate and they delivered the Son of God to be crucified.   With our love for God, the commandments and our neighbor we will overcome these vices.

St. Jehudiel is a great leader and helper.   His unquestionable acceptance of the decrees of God and his zeal to fulfill the divine commands of his creator tightened this bond for all eternity.   St Jehudiel adores God from eternity to eternity and personifies through love eternal adoration.   The chosen people rejected and broke the Old Covenant by rejecting the decrees of Almighty God.   We are all called to receive the crown of eternal reward that God gives to those who are faithful and obedient.   St. Jehudiel carries this crown in his right hand.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~Prayer~~~~~~~~~

"Oh glorious St. Jehudiel Archangel,

You mighty opponent of the wicked angels

Come to our assistance with your faithful defenders

Protect us in battle against the snares of h**l

Who want to destroy the Church of Our Lord Jesus Christ

Take all pride and envy from our hearts, so that we may praise God forever".   Amen.

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We invoke St. Sealtiel for married couples, so that they may be true to each other and fulfill God's plan for which He has created them.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~Prayer~~~~~~~~~

"Oh glorious St. Sealtiel Archangel,

Help and assist us in our battle against the evil one

Through vigilant and dally prayer, that we may have the strength to escape the tribulations that are imminent

So teach us to pray as the Lord prayed and taught us to pray". Amen

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St. Barachiel holds the book of rituals and blessings in his right hand, for it is said: "It is the Lord's blessing that brings wealth, and no effort can substitute for it" (Prov. 10-22).   Almighty God has entrusted the blessed sacraments and blessings to His priests.   It is our duty to pray and intercede for the priests that they fulfill their vocation with total self-denial, sacrifice and resignation.   St. Barachiel and his companions will assist and help us so we may follow the call of our vocation.   St. Paul writes: Unity in the body, I then, a prisoner of the Lord, urge you to live in a manner worthy of the call, with all humility and gentleness, with patience, bearing with one another th