How can I convince a 15 year old' Parents that I don't want to hurt their daughter?

Question

Hi There,

I have been looking on line for quite a while for some information about this but I have not found anything that is really helpful to me. The problem is that I am 25 and I am best friends with a girl who is 15, now I don't want anything else then to be friends with her but her parents are thinking that I want to hurt her or do something bad or things that I shouldn't be doing with her WHICH I DON'T all I want is to be her friend but how can I get them to realise this and get off bother her back and mine about our friendship

Answer 1

I am a mom and there is NOTHING you could say to me that would make me accept or allow a 25 year old Man to hang out with my 15 year old daughter...I wouldn't even dare to tell my husband as you would probably end up somewhere in the NV desert.  No parent, regardless of your intentions will feel comfortable with your attention or intent.

Answer 2

What can you possibly have in common with a 15 year old girl. She is still a child and you are an adult. I'm sorry but I wouldn't want a 25 year old man sniffing round my 15 year old daughter (if I had one) She may get the wrong idea and expect more off you. I would keep my distance until she is a bit older. Her parents are right to be worried

Answer 3

Here's a thought for you:  I have a 14 year old daughter, and the first time, not the 2nd, 3rd, or 23rd, but the FIRST time she comes home at 15 and there's a 25 year old guy trying to hang around, she's going to her room, I'm going to jail, and the 25 year old is going to the ER or the morgue, I don't care which.  It's inappropriate, and you do sound like a pedophile, whether you're q***r or not.  Wake up, get a life, and leave the kids alone.

Answer 4

Just be patient.Try to win them over little by little.& reassure them you just want to be friends with her nothing else.I dont think theirs nothing wrong with it unlike the rest of the people.

Answer 5

I have a 15 year old daughter and if she had a 25 year old male friend I would be suspicious of his intentions towards her and would not be comfortable with them continuing a relationship of any sort.

Why do you want to hang out with a 15 year old anyway?

I think, really, you should respect her parents and try and see that they probably have genuine concerns for their daughter's safety.

Best thing for you to do is leave this friendship now, 15's a vulnerable age, take a step back.

Answer 6

You can convince her parents by leaving her alone. She's 15 and you're 25.

Answer 7

I'm sure you are an ordinary descent human being...and as you say you like hanging out with her...well the parents of this young girl don't want you near her...so find a new friend to play with , preferably one your own age... you can reason around this inappropriate relationship anyway you want but in the end it's not right for a 25 yr old man to be hanging around with a 15yr old girl...and well  you know it...the difference between a girl of 15yrs and a man of 25yrs is 10 yrs.

Answer 8

What on earth would a 25yr old and a 15yr old have in common?  Seriously, move on and find some other friends.  If everything is as innocent as you say, things could get horribly worse if this "young mind" forms a crush on you.  Imagine what the cops or parents would assume and who do you think they would believe?  Although the relationship may be innocent, I would hang out with people my own age.

Answer 9

Can you get a friend your own age?

Answer 10

Okay, now you just sound like some pedophile who is making excuses to make himself look good You've changed your details more than once! You're spending all that time with her? Give me a break! It's all excuses, like I said before, end it! Before they call the cops and get a restraining order against you, it sounds like you're trying to win her over so you can get the under aged action, you're disgusting

Answer 11

I didnt even read all of the question I am afraid as I know this type of situation all too well.

You probably aren't going to win the parents round what-so-ever, they do not want their child hanging around with a man and it is perfectly understandable.  You would probably not like your daughter doing the same thing.

The only thing you can so is to see the girl only when she is with her parents under supervision.  This way the parents know you are not there to hurt her and will hopefully gain some trust in you.  Maybe after a few years they will let you hang out with her alone but then maybe not.... you can only try.  

Maybe the girl has feelings for you that you are unaware of but her parents are all too aware of.  They are scared of their little girl growing up too quickly and they are perfectly within their rights to worry for their daughter.

I am sorry if that is not the answer you are looking for but I feel you will be getting a lot of the same.

Answer 12

You can't.

Even if there is nothing sinister about this friendship it says something about your personality that your befriend young girls.

Answer 13

If you really respect this girl as a friend, you will break off the friendship to spare her the grief from her parents and others...so you arent breaking a law by being her friend, thats a bit of a blinkered view, as you will be causing her lots of grief...stick with older friends, friend :-)

Answer 14

Probably better to back off and leave well alone. If they don't get it, that's there problem. In 3 years' time she will be old enough to choose her friends without their interference, and if you are good friends now, the chances are that you will also be good friends then.  

Answer 15

It would appear strange. The only way I could be convinced if everything was public and open. IE no private time on the net if I couldn't be in the room, only meeting in a group with other people and preferably in a public place.

If you are in the bedroom, keep the door open.

Tell them you are g*y, or tell her and encourage her to mention your boyfriend every now and again. The boyfriend can be fictional if he does the job of settling her parent's minds.

And most of all, keep your hands off. Don't even jokingly punch this girl on the arm. If you give friendly touches, the parents will notice.

Perhaps even confide in them that you are g*y. Encourage your friend to talk to her parents about your boyfriend. They can't argue with that!

Don't spend too much time with her. You have plenty of friends, so make sure they all know you are spending time with all your friends and not an over amount with her. A couple of times a week perhaps.

Perhaps make the parents your friends too. Showing them that you can be trusted is going to take a long time though.