How can I deal with the fact that I may never see my Dad again?

Question

My father was diagnosed with acute leukemia on the 14th of July and now he is in the Intensive Care Unit because a lot of his organs are starting to fail from the chemo therapy...I know that I can't really do much but wait for what will happen next, but what can I do in the meantime so that I don't feel so sad? A lot of people are supporting us, but they aren't here right now and I just don't know how I will cope...college starts for me in less than a month and I don't feel properly prepared...can you give me some suggestions on what I can do to help myself?

-Thanks.

Answer 1

Keep close to family and find someone to talk to let your feelings out. Is there any way to see your dad? If you can, then go and talk to him while you still have the chance. I'm sure your dad would want you to go to college and pursue your goals. Talk to him and tell him what you're feeling, cry it out and get the emotions out. You should feel like a weight has been lifted off of you. My mother has lost both of her parents, my grandparents, and she struggles every day with the fact that she never was able to say goodbye to my grandpa. Even if he isn't going to die, make sure and talk to him, tell him how you feel. When I learned my grandmother had intestinal cancer and her time was growing rapidly near, I immediately went to see her. I saw her with my family the day before she died. She had her most lucid moments with my husband and I and our 2 children. I ended up sharing those things she said at the funeral. I have found that it also helps me to write a poem about the person when they are passing or preparing to pass. A sort of tribute to their life. I write pretty good, so everyone always requests me to read them aloud at the funerals. Sometimes, I can write them 10 minutes before the funeral and it comes out wonderful. Writing it out also tends to help. Even if you can't write poetry, try writing a letter (addressing it to your father, as if you were talking to him). Writing or talking it out is another type of personal therapy. Be prepared for what may happen, and try to be realistic about it. My mother was not realistic about it, and she still lives each day as if they just died. It has been very hard for her. I did suggest she write letters to them. She did admit that this has actually helped her. She can no longer speak to them since they have passed, but she writes letters to them daily as if they are still here. Good Luck! =)

Answer 2

It sounds like your dad is dieing and unfortunately you'll have to come to grips with this. Remember all the great times you had with him and who he is as a man. NOW to have peace with yourself. Make sure you tell him that you love him and you'll miss him terribly. I'm so sorry you have to go through this. I watched my mother and father die. I still remember it very well. Time will take away the sting....not the memories. Make sure you talk to him while you still can. Those last hours are very important. Oh, ya, have a real good cry.