How can I get The Bride out from under her mother's thumb to have some fun w/out getting her in trouble?

Question

I am the Maid of Honor for my best friend who is getting married in October. Her mother and she are planning on sewing not only her dress, but other things, like the bridesmaids dresses, table runners etc. Her mother is driving her crazy with demands and I don’t know what to do! She has her sewing and planning wedding things every night and if The Bride even goes out to help her finance pick out groomsmen gifts, her mom thinks that’s unacceptable. I want to plan some fund things to help The Bride out and get her mind on to less stressful subjects (mainly because all she talks about si how she going crazy under her mother’s thumb), but I don’t want to get The Bride in trouble with her mom after a night of being out. What do I do?

Answer 1

Unfortunately this sounds like a situtation the bride's going to have to take care of herself. She needs to put her foot down and explain to her Mother that enough is enough. Once that's done you two can plan something, but until then I'm afraid that it's going to be hard, if not impossible, to do anything.

Answer 2

How sad for that young lady....she must be very sheltered.  But ultimately, the bride herself has to stand up to her overly controlling mother.

You can plan an evening where you make up an excuse of why she should come over (getting together the seating chart, preparing the guest souveniers, going through the order of events and things that still has to be done...etc.).  When she finally comes over, you guys just have some innocent let your hair down fun.

Answer 3

Short of an intervention, all I can think of is showing up at their house one day (preplan this with the bride if you think this would work), and tell Mom you are "kidnapping" the bride, because as Maid of Honor, you have some official duties, too.

Tell the mother just what you will be doing, and when you will be back, but do not soften, and stick to plan so she can rely on your word.  Arrive with a treat for her, even if it is just a wonderful cool drink, and bring her back something nice too, but stick to your guns.

People go nuts over weddings!  Too bad, huh?

Answer 4

The bride needs to tell her mom that she loves her and appreciates everything she is doing. Then kindly tell her to back off!! She needs a break! Take her out, anything, even just dinner to get her mind elsewhere. This gal needs time away from Mom. I think you girls need a night out at Sing-Sing. Do you have those where you live? Dueling piano bar, lots of fun...

Answer 5

Okay. If she is getting married her mother is going to have to accept letting her go.  How old is she?  Why don't you step in and help with the wedding. Maybe she will feel some relief if you help her fight for her ideas.  You can't do anything to get her out- except talk her into talking to her mother about this over demanding wedding stuff.  You are her Maid of Honor- take her out to eat, out to get some drinks, out shopping, do whatever you usually do or something totally different. Kidnap her and don't tell her mother- lol

Answer 6

If your friends thinks she mature enough to get married, then she's mature enough to do whatever the h**l she wants to without worrying about her mother. Maybe she bit off more than she can chew with all the sewing and you girls need to just buy your own dresses and various other little details. It's time for her to grow up.

Answer 7

The bride is going to have to stand up for herself.  It sounds like, if she doesn't, she is going to cause herself problems and her marriage problems.  If you are her friend, you should talk to her about it.