How can I get away with not having any children at my wedding?

Question

Me and my partner have no kids but my partner's family has lots of children and we only have space for 80 guests so would prefer just adults but I don't want to seem rude, the wedding is during the week

Answer 1

We didnt have any children at our wedding either.  We put on the invites that unfortunately due to size of the venue we are unable to cater for children.  Didnt get any negative feedback.  Good luck!

Answer 2

my cousin did this.

when ur sendin out invitations, simply ask parents an the eldest in each family (if the eldest is over 18) an tel ur mum this, so when ur aunts an uncles ring her to talk about it, she can explain properly...so u dnt look lik da bad guy

hope it helps

Answer 3

Awkward.

Maybe stick with you plan at the wedding. You could consider the creche idea but what about older kids? Whatever you do have a policy and stick too it - ither guests shouldn't see one or two children around even if you know they will behave if the invitation says adult only.

If the families live near perhaps you cou could plan an outing like a large picnic/barbeque (outdoors would help with space and place to run around/play) where families would be invited. perhaps each small group could contribute - ask one to bring quiche, another crisps, another potato salad - that way the burden of costs would be shared.

If your partner's family is coming from a long way then it is a bit tough to say no children - they may not be able to come at all, but I understand the problem.

Answer 4

Just ask them not to bring their kids, or just dont invite anyone with kids and have no one at your wedding. There may just be no way around it...sorry to tell you

Answer 5

You can't. Reschedule when you can afford a bigger venue.

Answer 6

OK...don't listen to the people who tell you that you can't. I'm in the same boat. I would have all of them there if I could afford it but my budget simply won't allow it and I don't feel bad about that either. If someone kicks up a stink about it then they don't have to come! Thats the way I see it. We have put on all of our invitations ''children are welcome at the ceremony'' (we are getting married outdoors and will have the space) We wrote the invitations to the adults and left the kids names off. With that little line ''chidren are welcome at the ceremony'' we figured it is the most polite way of saying 'please don't bring them to the reception. Best of luck and congrats. Hope this helps you.

Answer 7

Put crude pictures on your wedding invitations. Like genitals and what not. No one will be quite sure what to expect...so they'll probably leave the kids at home...

Answer 8

All you have to do is ask your guests.  Be prepared to make a lot of your friends and family angry.

Answer 9

not a good time most people work during the week and dont have guest if u dont want kids! we had tons of kids at the wedding and our favors were bubbles and chocolate! incorporate kids moree guests will come and ull get more presents if they r saving money on sitters and dinner! lol good luck and congrats its always room for kiddies. at my wedding march 29 2008 the kids were pretty good and danced all nite on the wedding video.whats the worst that could happen

Answer 10

You can just make sure the wedding is later at night, and put it nicely on the invite. Adults only! but in a nice way! Congrats and good luck

Answer 11

It is YOUR wedding so you are not being rude.  It is supposed to be the way you want it.

In the invitation, simply state, "Due to limited seating, we respectfully request that children are not to attend.  We appreciate your understanding and cooperation with our wishes."  You may even want to state an age so that someone doesn't think that their 8 year old is not a child and pull the whole, "Oh, I thought you meant infants." excuse.

If someone brings children after that, then they are the ones being rude.

Good luck

Answer 12

It's your wedding, make it known to your guests that children are not invited.

Answer 13

Provide a babysitter where all children will be kept or simply put on the invities no children under the age of 14 or so.

Answer 14

We are providing our friends and family with babysitters. My sister offered her house and we are paying three professional Nannies to watch all the children. Everyone has agreed to the idea and has RSVPed there children. Most are looking forward to the break lol.

We don't want children at our wedding either.

If you can't afford to pay a sitter there is nothing wrong with letting your guests know on the invitation that this is an adult only affair.

Some people opt for Adult Only ceramonys or Adult Only receptions, and like us, we are opting for all of it being Adults Only.

Answer 15

It's your wedding,just ask the adults you invite to not bring their kids because you only have enough room for the adults

Answer 16

Tell them its an adult wedding my moms cousin had a wedding and she told everyone that it was an adult wedding the only kids that were aloud to come were the flower girl and the ring boy or whatever you call him.

Answer 17

is there another room in the facility? If there is set up a play room for the the kids and hire some babysitters. Not everyone can arrange for a babysitter or afford one.

Answer 18

Hmm, that's a little tricky.  Perhaps you could offer some fun alternate activity for the kids during the ceremony?  Like, hire some babysitters to organize games and crafts for them.  

Answer 19

Tell the parents there will be lots of Alcohol and nudity..

Answer 20

just let children come to the wedding and when the dance starts just send home the kids to a babysitter.  

Answer 21

Have it printed on the invitation that its an "Adult only wedding/reception"

Answer 22

Write on the invitation that the wedding is for adults only and provide child care for the children.  I had a great time as a teenager babysitting for a wedding party.  In this case the children were allowed at the ceremony but not the reception.  The babysitters were my sister, 2 friends and myself.  I don't remember how many kids there were.  It was fun, we played together with the kids and separated them as necessary when they needed quit time or whatever.

As long as you arrainge for childcare, it should not be a problem.

Answer 23

Ha ha... this has to be one of the most controversial wedding practices. According to proper etiquette if you address the invite to Mr. and Mrs. Jones then only Mr. and Ms. Jones are invited. The Jones Family would include everyone. Unfortunately, not everyone follows proper etiquette and some people will bring children anyway.

The only way I can think of politely getting around it would be if the RSVP card had two lines to include names of attendees (since most invites are only meant for two). Even then, I'm sure some people would just add the names or not include their children at all.

Really, your best bet is to just put, "due to limited space we must restrict RSVPs to adults only". Even if this is a unpopular idea and some people might get upset, it's the only way to ensure that there won't be any children.  

Answer 24

Personally I have not problem with "adult reception to follow" or  something similar to that on an invite. Also, I have no children (and do not want any at my wedding either) But that statement "no children" is apparently offensive to parents who like to drag their kids everywhere with them. I think if I had kids and they were invited to a wedding, i would still leave them at home with a sitter so i could have a night out, but hey that's just me. You could just send out the invites with an  r.s.v.p. with a thing on the bottom that says  _____ out of 2 attending, that way a couple gets that their kids aren't invited, or put adults only on the r.s.v.p card. If someone mails  your back the r.s.v.p and it says more people are attending then you actually invited you just call them and let them know b/c of space restrictions, kids are not going to be coming. And spread this info by word of mouth.  

Answer 25

Just print it on the invitation that no children. Just make sure you don't allow any to go.

I went to a wedding recently where they'd specified no children..which everyone felt was fine but then one coupld turned up with theirs and the bride and groom had allowed it as they couldn't find a sitter...only problem was it caused alot of tension with some other guests.

So just say apologies but no children. explain to people when you see them that you were very tight on numbers and if they don't like it then they aren't the sort of people who should be celebrating YOUR special day.

good luck  

Answer 26

Dangerous ground so be carefull where you tread. You could ask people what they thought of the idea, especially the ones with kids. Saying stuff like you know how bored they get and tired, in other words put the idea in their heads. Reverse psychology is what's needed, before dropping the bombshell.

Answer 27

Its really yours and your husband to be choice.  The only rule is to make sure that everyone is aware well in advance.  This means that they have time to find a sitter, and also it means that people wont be shocked if they think that their child is invited and then getting told at a later date that there not.

When i get married i'll be in the same situation, we have no kids but my sister and his sister both do, but we dont want children there!

Also it is NOT your job to be arranging childcare for other peoples children, you have enough to sort with the wedding plans!   Surley people have some friend or relative that can look after their kids!

Answer 28

Its your day so you can do whatever you like!!  I would just put something like ' it is with regret but due to restricted space at the venue we are are unable to accommodate children' x

Answer 29

im not having children at my wedding either except the flower girl and page boy. All i have said is adult only reception. I have been to a few weddings and there were no kids

Answer 30

Just put on the wedding invitations that the wedding has been given an R rating due to the sexually graphic content in the ceremony.

Answer 31

You're allowed to have an "adults-only" ceremony and reception, but it would be smart of you to arrange some sort of child care for your guests. That way, they won't have to make the choice between going/not going based on whether they can bring their families, and you also don't force out-of-town guests to scramble for babysitters in a city they're not familiar with.

When you address invitations, be clear and invite "Mr. & Mrs. X" by name, instead of "X family," and indicate somewhere (not on the invitation itself, but perhaps on the insert with directions to the reception site) that the ceremony and reception are adults-only. If you get any RSVP's that indicate that a guest intends to bring their children, nip it in the bud and call them immediately to clarify that the ceremony is only for adults, but such and such child care options are available.

One important thing - don't budge on the adults-only rule for anyone. If you allow any children at the ceremony or reception, those people whose children were not invited will be very offended.