How can I get my parents to understand that education is not my number one goal?

Question

I just got engaged, my parents are happy for me, but whenever I try to bring up my dreams (I want to be a home schooling mother of a large family of internationally adopted children) they just start barking at me about education.

My fiance and I are trying to plan where we will go to school (we want to go to Bible College) and my parents keep pointing us to the most expensive, prestigious schools like Wheaton and Calvin. When I bring up my dreams of homeschooling and the need to not spend big, they just start hollering about how important getting a good education is.

If we go to a fancy expensive Bible College, we'll be in debt and won't be able to accomplish OUR dreams!!!

How can I make my parents understand that I'm not interested in an expensive, drawn out education?

Answer 1

I'm a tad confused about a few things - like, if you only go to bible college, where will you get your rounded out education to enable you to be in a position to then 'teach' others?  Who's going to pay for bible college?  You or your parents?  what do you plan on having as an income to not only render yourselves capable of adopting children, but able to support them all?  what else can you do with a bible college education to earn a living?

I find the best way to get out from under your parent's rule, is to get out of their house and into your own.

Answer 2

just say" mom, dad, love ya but it is what it is and this is how its gonna be"

Answer 3

i think will smith says it best, sometimes parents just don't understand. I would just pursue your dreams and take the most efficient route rather than most expensive. Make sure you have a full plan on how you plan to get to that goal and show your parents what you intend to do. You may not be able to get their approval until your done, but at the end of the day all that matters is that you are happy. Good luck!

Answer 4

Your parents are smart.  This isn't the 1950's, husbands can no longer support a household financially.  It would be unwise for you not to get an education.  What if your husband gets laid off work?  Who will feed all those kids?  Things aren't like they used to be.  There is no such thing as a good secure job anymore.

Your parents are looking out for your best interest.

Edit: Garrison is right, it is a fantasy.  What you don't seem to understand is that husbands can no longer afford the rent, utilities and food for a family.  You WILL have to work .  Our economy does not support only one breadwinner, it hasn't for about 20 years now.

Answer 5

Well, I've seen some WILD FANTASIES on here.. but that is about the wildest one I've seen in a long time.

That is just about the MOST UN-REALISTIC GOAL I have ever seen.  Just how to you plan to support this large family of international adopted children... you aren't MADONNA and most countries are making it nearly IMPOSSIBLE to adopt children in their country to outsiders.

Your parents are wise... GET AN EDUCATION and by the time you get through THAT you may have grown up a bit and realized how rediculous that goal of yours really is.... really... IT'S NOT WORKABLE...  

Answer 6

princilla follow your dreams money isn,t everything if you are happy living a simple life you and your mate iam proud of you.if necessary write your parents a letter are make a tape and tell them of your dreams and have it specially deliver to them and then maybe they will listen. i wish you all the happiness in the world.

Answer 7

i say you tell them that you wanna do what you wanna do first. but you have to know that education is the key to success. so eventually one, if not both, of you needs some kind of education if you want to support a family.

Answer 8

Well we always want a better life for our children,or do we really want our children to live the dreams we did'nt? I'm not really sure I guess it depends on the parent. I would have to say you should be firm but respectful and let your parents know that they chose their life and you will chose yours, however you do appreciate their input.

Answer 9

Living life is an education in and of itself.  Higher education is over-rated by a huge factor in today's society.  You must be content with your choices and love what you do, regardless of cries from the peanut gallery.  Just pray everyday for guidance and, above all, wisdom to find what is best for you.  I would try to fit school in to your life, rather than try to organize your life around school.

Answer 10

start making your own decisions. choosing an inexpensive college is wise.

oh, and make sure you can support and feed yourself and the adopted kids in a well chosen career. in case your husband of the  large international family chooses to leave you for his girlfriend.

edited to add:  and you might need a second income because international adoptions are about $10,000 to 20,000 a pop.