How can I get this through to my Mom??

Question

Ok, so I'm the youngest of 4 sisters. There all about 10+ years older than me, and(of course) they have all moved out by now. I'm 14. So anyway, each of my sisters had there own problems being a teenager, like running away, pregnancy and all. So my Mom is extremely protective over me, and she always expects me to tell her everything...which I dont. I'm not close to my Mom at all. But i can never get away from her because its just me and her in our house(no dad). I mean shell be talking to me and ask the most random things, like “are you depressed?" or one time she even thought I was pregnant and asked “are you pregnant?” She just thinks that if I don’t talk to her, then somethings wrong and that’s not true. Then she talks about me and my supposed “problems”, to my nephew who is only a 2 yrs younger than me. Which might I add sleeps over EVERY Friday night, and I hate him. He embarrasses the h**l out of me, he stinks, and I feel like I cant have anyfriends over because him. I know that sounds mean, but it’s the truth and he makes such a huge mess and my Mom wont clean it up so I always have to.

---Ok so anyway I just got on this competitive soccer team, and I havent really gotten close to any of the girls on the team yet, so I’m a little sensitive about it. But my moms always saying how I need to talk to the girls more. Its not that I don’t talk to the girls, its just I’m not extremely close to any of them yet. Anyway she never stops bugging me about it, so I stay in my room more. Now she thinks something’s wrong. I mean my main problem is I don’t like her at my games, like I said shes always staring at me and she invites people I don’t want to come. I tell her I don’t want certain people to come but she says its not my decision. Which is stupid, if I don’t want someone at my game then I should have some say.

------So my main problem is that I just don’t like anyone at my games, and I don’t like her being so in to everything I do…How can I explain all this to her?

Answer 1

what you can do is tell her that she is being over protective and that you need a little space make sure she knows that there is no problem. Make sure if she does give you freedom DO NOT and i repeat DO NOT get in big trouble or she will get way more over protective.

hope this helps.

Answer 2

just try and talk to her

Answer 3

Print out your question and give it to your mom to read.

See what happens from there.

:-))

Answer 4

Try telling her everything you just said here. Tell her how you feel she is smothering you and being too paranoid over you. Tell her you are fine and if you're not talking to her it doesn't mean there's something wrong. Make a deal, telling her that if something ever IS wrong, that you will tell her. But until then you'd like a little more space and privacy in your life. Dont forget to include that you appreciate and love your mom and understand that she's only trying to protect you.

Answer 5

try explaining the problem 2 her!!!

Answer 6

Is she paying the fee for you to play soccer?  Does she drive you to the games, even the ones that are out of town? Sports activities aren't cheap.  Whenever my kids signed up for something, I told them I reserved the right to watch what I had paid for.  But that's all I did - just watch - unless they wanted advice or wanted to talk about the game.  They never seemed to mind my presence.

Of course she is "into everything" that you do.  That's a mom's job. She has probably been that way since you were little, right?  She's used to that. Eventually she will give you more independence, but for her it's a gradual process.  You want it to happen all at once.

Explain how you feel. Moms can be amazingly understanding if you talk to them honestly.  Maybe you can arrive at a compromise.  Maybe she can attend your home games but not the away games.  Maybe it would be OK for her to bring guests occasionally if she asks ahead of time.

Being able to negotiate and compromise is a sign of maturity.  Saying she is stupid because she doesn't see things your way is not.  

Answer 7

God forbid she loves and protects you. Holy c**p, she actually goes to your games? What a witch.

It is her job to be in your life and make sure you don't s***w up. It is your job to be MATURE enough to understand that even though it is frustrating to you. Have a little self awareness here. Would you rather she didn't give a flying S**t what happened to you? You'd complain she didn't love you then.

Try telling her things to ease her mind so she doesn't have to ask. Tell her good news--made a new friend, got a good grade today, etc.

You are the one to blame here. You are alienating her making her push more. Work on trying to be closer to her. She is the #1 person looking out for you right now...and you have no appreciation whatsoever. Tell her you love her once in a while. She pushed you out and cared for you all this time....and you thank her for life by being a moody ingrateful brat. Not cool, kid.

You will in time become ashamed at how self-centered you have been. I hope it's sooner than later.

Answer 8

you should really talk to her if she cares so much of ur feelings she will understand,tell her that u know whats right from wrong and you won't make the same mistakes ur sisters made,trust me i'm the youngest too i'm 14 ad stuck wit a lil nephew too but mine is 7 years younger than me,tell her that u know how much she loves you and cares about you ur uncomfortable about stuff she does,hope i helped,good luck=]

Answer 9

Well, my problem is sort of simular, my brother is 10 and home school because of ADD ( atention deffisces disorder) and my sister moved out at 16. Now whenever i do something, she always ask me what. Its hard to deal with, but all you have to do is go to the movies with her, swim with her, do some bonding and tell her about your life, not too much or she'll keep asking about it. And as for your soccer team, dont mind it, you have your school friends, i had that problem when i was in dance, all the students in my class where s****., so i didnt make friends at my dance place. For your cousin, while your bonding with your mother, tell her how you want to have friends come over sometimes, so you wanted to know if he could come over once a month, or maybe once every other weekend.

Hope this helps!