How can I give this back without starting drama?

Question

When my ex-bff and I were still friends, I saw her talking with my other ex-bff and they were looking at me and whispering. I also saw them sometimes writing stuff down in a notebook when I was with them during class and passing it back and forth between them. They would never tell me what they were talking about or writing down. This had happened alot throughout the school year. So I got suspicious and when my best friend wasn't looking I took her notebook (I know I shouldn't have, but I really wanted to know! I have really low self esteem and am really shy). Later that night I read it and.. sure enough.. there was a bunch of stuff in there about me. Like how I looked at them alot and stuff and they were making fun of me and saying stuff like I'm mad at them. All this behind my back while I was still best friends with them! Ironically, a couple of weeks later they "got mad at me" (there was no concrete answer, they would never tell me themselves, everyone else would tell me different stuff) and haven't talked to me since then. They have also told alot of people about me who don't even know me and now they all give me dirty looks and talk behind my back. Also, whenever I try to apologize and start over, they all start yelling at me. This was almost 2 years ago. I still have the notebook. I want to give it back to her because lately I've been trying to become a better person overall. Do I give it back to her? If so, how?

Thank you for taking the time to read this long story, and for the advice!

Answer 1

There is no way to give it back without drama. But you need to face the truth, they got together and decided not to like you. Probably for no good reason, but that doesn't matter. Later they decided you would never be their friend, so whenever you tried to patch things up they would get mad at you just to get mad at you.

I would say don't give it back, toss it. Some people are just cruel, no matter how nice you are to them. Believe in Karma, don't do what you did again, trust people. If they end up not being your friends, you haven't lost a real friend anyway. They made fun of you in order to make themselves feel better, but in the end you're better off without them. You have nothing to apologize for, other than it took you so long to get rid of them.

Answer 2

It's nice of you to want to make up for what you did. But it wont make them not be nasty people. If I where you I would get rid of it. But if you really want to do the right thing, march up to them and say "here's your note book I took it because I was worried you didn't like me. Now I realize you aren't good enough for me to hang out with any way. So I'm giving it back and I'm sorry I stooped to your infantile level and took it. I don't need you to like me so I don't need the reminder.!

Answer 3

Trash the notebook and ditch them permanently because people like that never get better.  I know because I have been in your place before.  They will always do you wrong, I know.  Girls like that aren't worth your time at all!  Find some different friends who will treat you like they should.  

Completely disassociate yourself with them.  Let then know that they are nothing to you now.  They will probably get mad and they may even try harder to get to you but do your best to not let it bother you.  Don't take c**p from people like that because they aren't worth it.  

Answer 4

Don't give back the notebook, that would just cause a lot more drama! Don't talk to them at all, I know that this is hard, my best friend ditched me, which sucks. I decided not to talk to her anymore because she was being a jerk. You deserve way more then what they did to you. Just hold your head high and make new friends!

I hope this helps! :)

Answer 5

put it on her door step

Answer 6

Okay so i was a girl who wrote in the notebook about other girls. And the fact that someone stole it... Is just plain rude. I understand why your mad but stealing is a crime gossiping is not.Just hand it to them personally and say "Thanks for writing about me" Don't get any teachers involved because hat makes the other girls super angry.  

Answer 7

Hunny if they are so imature as to write all that c**p about you and to even tell people that dont even know you, bad things about you, I would go up to her and hand it back. Dont look scared and if she starts yelling at you, smile a very sweet smile (this WILL p**s her off because the yelling isnt working) She isnt your bff anymore so why care what she thinks and what others think. You  know who you are and thats all that matters. Dont be afraid to hand it back to her, she should be the one ashamed of what she did.

^-^ you had the guts to take the notebook, ^-^ you should have the guts to hand it back to her with a smile on your face. Dont say a word when you hand it back to her, just smile and walk away.

(this gets girls pissed trust me, pissing people off is my passion)

Remember have confidence when handing it back and dont let her say anything and if she insults you say thanx and keep walking away.

-good luck

; )

Answer 8

Burn the d**n notebook & stay AWAY from this "friend".

She sounds like a real *****, & I don't get why she's mad at you.

Shouldn't it be the opposite?! AND WHY THE HECK DID YOU APOLOGIZE?!

Dang you're wayy too nice :l

Answer 9

wow... thats some really immature stuff.

Answer 10

Kids can be mean, but that is all apart of growing up, it helps you to achieve a better understanding of how people can be and who to chose as friends in future.  There is no reason to maintain a friendship that has gone bad, but don't burn any bridges, just avoid them until you are ready to talk to them again.

Answer 11

well there's really no way getting around the drama, unless you just choose not to give it back to them and just say f**k it and f**k them. Now to me they seem like they never were your friends in the first place, they just seem like two inmature kids who have nothing better to do but run their mouths.And they decided to pick on you cuz 1) you had a low self-esteem and shy, and 2) you allowed it to go on for so long and did nothing to stop it. Now if it was me I would stand up in class in front of everyone and speak my peace and tell them actually what I though of them, and if they had anything to say to me then say it too my face and not behind my back or to be childish and write **** down about someone in a notebook then throw it at them, or choose to keep the notebook as evidence, cuz what they did is considered haressment.And you have the proof.If they say you stoled it, tell them that you had seen it fall from their belongings and you picked it up you were going to give it back to them but they weren't talking to you and they were mad at you right so then after reading it, you really decided then not to ever give it back until they say they were sorry for all the problems they had caused you. Take care and good luck. And find yourself some new friends.

Answer 12

um i would hand it to her dont say anything walk away u dont need to talk to them after what they did to you start new with new friends that like u for who u are not some bitchy girls that talk **** behid ur back but cant say it to ur face  

Answer 13

Just throw it away no need to cause anymore drama if you have already been hurt a lot. Move on from it giving the notebook back isn't going to make you a better or worse person, just put it behind you.

Answer 14

I don't see the point of giving it back.  It would be different if they weren't talking about you in the notebook.  But, they were.  They are not your friends and you shouldn't want them to be.  Just try to move on from the situation.

Answer 15

Throw that book away.Keep yourself away from the negativity you once where dealing with.Your being a better person by not beating them up for talking about u behind ur back.lol

Answer 16

Put it back when she's not looking, just the way you took it.  

Answer 17

slip it in her locker or like just put it on the floor infront of her locker or somehting liek that. dont go up to her since she will start yelling in the first place for even talking to her right,,,