How can I go from a shy nobody to a popular girl by September?? (10 POINTS!)?

Question

I'm 16 and I'm going to start college (for Americans, that's the last 2 years of whatever you do before university) in September.

At my last school I got a reputation for being a shy, uptight weirdo. I'm shy, but not uptight or weird- I was just very unhappy and had personal problems. I made friends with the wrong people & they manipulated me, lowered my self esteem and spread bad rumours about me that meant I was bullied & couldn't make any more friends (they told all the girls I was a L*****n & also that I was messed up in the head cos I'd been raped when I was 8, which is totally made up). On top of that I was suffering from depression and panic attacks. My last school SUCKED and I hated every second because I didn't like the very few 'friends' I had, and nobody else liked me/even knew I existed.

I want this to change. I want to be a confident, popular girl, and be the best I can possibly be. I want to be charming and liked by the majority of people. I want everyone at my new school to wish they were like me. I don't want to be used or treated like c**p by anyone ever again, I want to stand up for myself and be a strong personality. I know that might sound shallow, but I'm sick of being walked all over and ignored and I think I deserve a chance to be an alpha girl. I think I'm a generally okay/good person, and I've been told I'm very pretty (even though I can't see it myself), but I have very low self esteem and get anxious when talking to new people. Also, the new college has no uniform, so I'm going to have to come up with cool outfits that are suitable for classes, but cute, which I'm not sure about.

How can I get what I want in like 3 weeks time?? If I have to fake confidence, how do I do that? & what makes popular people so attractive to others? What should I wear?

Any advice about any of these questions will be appreciated a lot! 10 points for best answer :) Thank you x*x

Answer 1

Make a few good friends when you get there and also try to get a few other friends. You could also try updating your wardrobe or getting your hair done to help with confidence and you might find it easier to make new friends and fit in more.Every girl should have a good pair of jeans and it is good to have a few really nice but simple t-shirts and a few jumpers or zip-up  jackets , that's a simple but great look that is also very comfortable.

After all , if you look good outside, you feel good inside!  

Answer 2

I'm sorry that you've had such a bad time in school.  You've hit the nail on the head when you say that you made friends with the wrong people.  Anybody who says those kind of things about you, is definitely not your friend.

As you get older, you will learn to get rid of people in your life that are 'toxic' and treat you badly.  You are young yet.  That will come.

Don't think that you have to compete with clothes etc.  Wear what you feel comfortable in, wear what you feel confident in.

Someone once said 'fake it until you feel it' - apply that to the confidence thing.  It's okay to pretend to feel outgoing, bubbly, whatever you want until you start to feel it naturally.  I don't think anybody can teach you how to be self confident - it will come.

Answer 3

Read up on how to overcome shyness on the net. If you feel like your panic attacks are serious, talk to a councilor. Professionals know how to help much more than anybody on yahoo answers.

Fake as much as possible. Eventually it'll become a habit and you'l just act confident.

As for fashion, do a little of every style.

Before trying to talk to people, listen to their conversations and try to mimic the language they use. Don't be a pushover/ copy everything they say, just mimic the tone of voice, hand gestures etc.

Everybody's different, so adjust your style of talking. For laid back people, be informal. Make jokes with the silly people. Nerds like interesting questions and want someone to talk about class with. Make sure you have something to contribute to the conversation/ an opinion. Talk to everyone. The people you sit by and the group of girls on your sports team. Make friends with everyone you meet.

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Make sure you learn networking. Chances are if you like your friends, you'll like the people they hang out with too. So go introduce yourself. I made most of my friends this way.

It's easy to make friends with other shy people. If someone isn't talking much, and is a loner, you guys probably have a lot in common. Gotta start somewhere...

Answer 4

Honey!!!!!!,

Take this from a popular girl!  Now listen very closely! This is how to become popular! You must follow every step!  1. Go to www.polyvore.com and start practicing your fashion! Read magazines (Teen Vogue, Marie Claire, etc.).  You need all the fashion sense you can get!  2. Read the Clique series by Lisi Harrison! That's what inspired me!  3. Now I know it's not okay to be mean all the time, but you need to think of some good comebacks like "Do I look like I sell fertilizer? Then why do you think I give a c**p!?". This gives people the sense that you're aren't shy and you know how to make a point! If you email me, I can make cute fashion sets and send them to you! Flirt with boys! It's the best thing! Now, lets go to number 4. If anyone asks you about the L*****n/rape thing, just laugh it off and tell them the truth!  Now what I need you to do is email me frequently A. so I can send you collections, B. so I can hear updates, and C. so that I can give you more information! :) i heart you! I may only be in 8th grade, but honey, let me tell you I GOT THE TIPS!!!!! I will be your coach!

Answer 5

Honestly...you cant fake confidence. You have to be comfortable with your body and mind to have confidence. I think maybe you need to do some exercises to build your self esteem...maybe go shoppin buy some new clothes( it does wonders for me) and get your hair cut. Start doing a hobby or sport that you can meet ppl in( the popular kids always played sports or were into clubs) but just remember even the most popular kids have real life problems. And can have no idependence whatsoever. Just try to be yourself don't lie i always looked up to the kids who were themselves...and don't follow the trend too easily you can get caught up in a lot of no good stuff doing that. But honestly go shopping try something new and get a hair cut. Don't be afraid to share your views. And for cool outfits always check out the manequins thats where i get alot of my ideas. And just remember this is a clean slate and you can do whatever you want. Build your confidence up girl the only person you have to worry about impressing anyone but yourself.  

Answer 6

well you sound like u want to go from point a to point z.Relax and focus on making a few trust worthy friends first and then i guess u can start thinking about"popularity".