Question:

How can I handle this? (girlfriend and facebook issues)?

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My gf does not like the idea of me opening a facebook account.

I used to have a hi5 account way back before I met her, but I hated the site and closed it. Never opened a myspace one, and a few months ago, she told me to get back into hi5. I told her I didn't like it, and that facebook didn't appeal to me neither.

However, recently, my brothers, and many of my friends have been telling me that I should open my facebook because I can set many privacy options (this is main concern with these sites). The other day, I opened a new account there, and I discovered that actually, it is safer than I thought. However, my gf is now mad, and wants me to delete my account, because she says that I opened it after my friends told me, and not when she told me a few months ago. After we talked, she told me she wants me to use only a shared facebook account with her but I told her that I want my own. I got nothing to hide from her, I just want my own facebook, because I can contact many old friends and other people I know through there, and share my pictures with my people without having to use other websites sepparatedly (I even offered her my password so she can check my account when she pleases but she still won't "negotiate", she just doesn't want me to have a facebook account).

The problem is that she does not agree with the idea that I'm thinking about doing it now, instead of doing it a few months ago when she told me (as I said, it just didn't appeal to me at the moment). Am I being egoistical or selfish here? Maybe some similar experiences of other people here would help me see this in a more objective angle.

Thank you for your help.

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16 ANSWERS


  1. your gf is very weird about this subject.

    its facebook, not match.com! tell her to loosen up!


  2. She sounds way too controlling, tell her to back off.

  3. You're supposed to be a partner in a relationship, not the other person's property.  Even if there were such a thing as a shared FB account, having one makes no more sense than a shared driver's license.

  4. your girlfriend is a controlling byotch.

  5. Dude, I say break up with her.  She sounds lame:

    http://www.bofads.com/stories/breakup2.h...

  6. har har har, who wears the pants in the relationship.

    thats insane, tell her you don't want her wearing undies, see what she does then.....lol

  7. That's a huge over-reaction!

    You've offered her your password which is more than most bf's / gf's will do.

    Is it more about the idea that you didn't want to do it when she suggested it and now you do? Geez, I didn't like the car a friend bought a few months ago but now I do. People change their mind all the time, it's not something to go nuclear over. Like someone else said, you're not on match.com here, you're on Facebook!

  8. I'm going to have to agree with the others here and say you are not in the wrong with this issue. but don't go and just "Dump the B...." as some have said that's never the best way to do things.

    My advice would be to keep the account and try not to back down about having your own personal page.

    Everyone needs their own personal space, protect yours no matter how small it is.

  9. YOU are NOT being selfish..your girlfriend is!

    there is NOTHING wrong with opening a facebook account.

    I got mad by reading this haha :p


  10. She sounds controlling.

    And insecure..

    I say ditch the bi*ch.

    Meet a real girl on Facebook while you're at it.. LOL.

  11. tell her to stop bossing you around. You have nothing to hide from her so untill she has found a reason not to trust you she shouldnt try to keep you from having your own things on whatever level. She doesnt seem to trust you, so maybe you should ask her why not.

  12. She sounds incredibly controlling.  You may need to "rethink" your relastionship with her.  However, you just need to tell her why you need or want it.  Most face book or mysapce sites are strictly for "hooking up".  She knows this as well as you, which is why she is upset at it.

    Tell her, if you were really wanted to hook up you would go to fling.com or some other site for that.

    Again, step back look at it from her side, and then "re-evaluate" your relationship with hers if she still says no.

    Good luck to you sir,


  13. Why does she want you to have a shared account?  You are not asking her for permission.  YOu are telling her upfront that you have a facebook account.  I don't even  get the "it's me or your account" ultimatum.  This is beyond controlling.  She has self esteem issues that she needs to deal with and not bully you to do things just her way.  Besides, it is not a dating service.  

  14. she is a selfish control freak. do you really need her?

  15. She sounds very possessive and jealous.

    You need your freedom and privacy and she should respect that.  If she doesn't trust you she will never love you fully.  

    You will end it under the thumb, friendless and miserable.  It all starts here so you have to out a stop to it if you want a proper relationship.


  16. Open 2 accounts... and block the shared account from your personal account. Go to the privacy settings.

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