How can I not get so down about my house (pics included)?

Question

I get so depressed about my house, it's such a piece of c**p. We can't afford to fix it up, we barely get by on what we make now, and we both have college educations and good jobs! We don't have cellphones or any other extras so I really don't see where we could cut back, and anytime I think we're going to get extra money to put into the house-BAM! something happens and we have to use the money elsewhere. We tried to refinance but it only appraised at 90k and we can't get enough money to make our payments and fix it up. I know I should be grateful for what I have, with today's housing market and stuff, but geez, I get so jealous of other people with their nice houses! How can I learn to appreciate what I have instead of wanting what I can't have (a nice house). Click on the pictures to read a full description. How do people afford such nice places?? http://www.flickr.com/photos/25323674@N02/

Answer 1

the house is not that bad.  IT is clean and neat and homey!  It looks comfortable.  I would not be uncomfortable there...why are you?

Look...life changes in an instant.  Your circumstances will change as life does..be patient.  There are many other things to worry about.  The most important thing in the world you can possess is your health.  With that you can do anything...without you can do nothing!  Be grateful you have good health.  

You need to go to a hospital and do some volunteer work there.  You will soon see there is always someone worse off than you....no matter what you are going through.

Example.  My son was in a car accident and he was only 7.  He was in a coma for 10 weeks and now he is paralyzed and he spent over 10 years in hospitals etc.

Good side?  My son is alive and lives in his own home and drives and has made it with the help of a few miracles.   He is happy...that is important!

During that time we got close to and watched 32 children die from cancer, lukemia , MD and other things.

I personally sat in the waiting room with some poor man who had four children with Muscular Dystrophy.  His wife left him and he took care of them...worked and buried three of them and was  watching his last  one die .  He had one more to bury.

I was talking to him the other day...he is remarried and has two more children and he is happy.  How dark his life was...and now it is so much better.  

Give it time..you are so lucky.....be happy and don't ever be ashamed of who you are or what you have!  You are important and what you have is YOURS.  BE HAPPY WITH IT!

Like I said..I would come visit and have a good time.  I look at the people and come to see THEM...NOT their house!

My friends are more important because of WHO they are.....

Susanna

Answer 2

Maybe you should look at the slum I'm living in. Stop looking at all the little c**p and focus on your family. That is the whole reason we have houses anyway, so we have a place to keep the family.

Answer 3

Your home is very nice actually, I think the colors are to much, dark red can be an overwelming color and to much is the same. try netural colors and clean out the clutter open up some space basicly. open space and netural colors will lift your mood alot and do one room at a time

Answer 4

Is the home mechanically sound ?  If so you have it made . the rest is all cosmetic , you can repair all the small rathee inexpensively if you just  research everything  and work out a game plan, not planning just wastes money . I am not sure where you live but as with most places real estate increase with value all the time . what was your home worth 10 years ago ? what do you think it will be worth in 10 years from now, i would almost guarantee twice what it is worth now, NOW that is something to look forward to it , take it one step at a time, work on each room one by one and you will become a part of the house because of all  those blood sweat and tears . Your home can be what you want , it's just that most of us can't just get a big chunk of  money and knock all the stuff from our  punch list out at one time, we do it one item at a time and a few years down the road  you will be happy, maybe start with the public areas of your home ,  than you can entertain and feel good about your home and than you can do the private areas, good luck and i feel that being a homeowner is awesome even if my house isn't what i hoped for at the moment  , everyday i do something and i enjoy it more and more .good luck

Answer 5

I Think It's A Really Nice House. You Shouldn't Fret. Find A Job Or Ask Some Money From Your Friends And you Can Probably Fix It up.

Answer 6

Don't give up- we all feel this way sometimes.You really seem to have 2 questions-

1. How do people afford more?

go to http://Dave Ramsey.com

He offer some great tips to getting out of debt and living better

2. How can I make my house look better?

-declutter

-paint everything the same color-try a light khaki/tan color

-rip out the carpet- (only if it's on the ground floor with concrete subflooring). For about $30, you can stain and seal the concrete-so much cleaner and fun than filthy carpet. Think coffee house look.

Also join freecycle-you may find  people giving things away that you would like and save yourself some money in the process. Hang in there.

Dave Ramsey's slogan is "Live like no one else so you can live like no one else." Be sure and follow his Baby Steps. You can find them on his site and the public library has his books.

Best of luck,

jana

http://www.summerhouseliving.com

Answer 7

I don't see ne thing wrong with your house.  yes, there are some areas which need attention, but overall your house is attractive.  Are you comparing your house to the 250,000 thousand dollar houses?  If you do that, yes you are going to be depressed.  I don't exactly like where I live, but I love the house.  sometimes you have to sacrafice, so that in the future you can get something which may be more to your liking.  consider your home a starter home.  have patience.  your more desireable home will come, but you need to discipline yourself in your starter home first.

Answer 8

There are some repairs you must make for safety. If you let things go too long, it will cost even more.

Here are my suggestions:

Float gauzy white curtains over the mirroredf doors, rods on both top and bottoms.

Kids bedroom needs new blinds, shade, or curtain, make out of two towels or pillowcases, or large panel, even beach towel.

Where paneling is bowed, get 6 ft sections of vines or seasonal flowers and staple around top border so it is not so noticeable. Go all around the room.

Try one of those cheap rug sets for LR floor, like a 5 X 8, and

two smaller runners.

Fan needs repair, switch might be gone.  Have it checked by electrcian or friend who can test for power. SAFETY RISK!

Living room, dark curtains are too much contrast, try gauzy white ones the same width as couch. Also use for wide opening showing kitchen. Yeah, I like gauzy white curtains!

Get rid of bedroom carpet, buy a new cheap one, cut it to fit around bed if you have to. Or put right over old one, staple down if to slides.

Back porch, cover comfy chairs with same pattern sheets, use dollar store decor & candles to perk it up.

You do not have to buy new, you can find curtains at Salvation Army, rummage sales, or thrift stores or make them from cheap material. . Get NEW rugs, unless you know who is giving it to you, you don't want fleas, pet stains, etc. Remnants are usually cheap.

Watch the room make over shows for more ideas. Try to be creative and enjoy what you have instead of wishing for something else. The people with nice houses might have other problems you do not want. Maybe they don't have any furniture in the house (that has happened!) , or are on the verge of backruptcy. Save $ for big repairs like new roof, etc.! If you are frugal and creative you can always change things if you don't like it.

Answer 9

Your house actually doesn't look that bad. Maybe paint your walls a different color than the trim, that way you won't notice the bowed walls as much, (the shadow of the trim ).From what I have read, experts say paint, paint, paint!  Your sons room looks good, just replace the blinds, or take them down and put up curtains, blinds are pretty cheap at Walmart. Throw rugs could cover up your floor bad spots. Don't be jealous of those fancy houses, cause they are most likely in debt up to their eyeballs!!

Answer 10

How do you not get down about your house?  By realizing that you really are lucky to have your own house.  A lot of people could not afford their own house, right?

Since you did ask what you could do, there are some rather simple and inexpensive quick fixes you could do to soften it up a bit though.  Focus on one room at a time.  Take the one room that bugs you most and take out as much clutter as you possibly can.  Then wash everything!  Remember that strong colours on the wall requires a more neutral colour in the furniture and fixtures.  When you  add a border or paint the top of the wall a different colour than the bottom, you chop the wall in half.  If your ceilings are not high, I wouldn't recommend doing that.

If you have furniture that has "good bones" but you don't like it, you can update it with simple sheets.  Give it a try.  If you have a staple gun and watch some of those decorating shows you will see how easy you can transform mismatched pieces into something more flowing.

Regarding the walls that are uneven, this is where you should try to save a couple of bucks and buy that textured, paintable wallpaper.  You can find it on sale if you look around and it is worth the extra money because it makes your walls look so nice.  It takes away the imperfections.

Also, you have a lot of open space - try to have the colours flow from one room to another.  If you like the wine or red colour, have it on a single accent wall and have an area rug of the same colour.  Then make sure that your carpet and window treatments are a bit more neutral.  In the next room, you could have red on the furniture with the same more neutral colour on the walls.  

Visit garage sales and discount stores. And - be sure to bring  pictures of your rooms with you.  It will help you make sure that the pieces match and will look good together.

I had a small garage sale and made about $100 in one day.  I was shocked.  When you de-clutter, clean up everything you are getting rid of and organize it into a great little garage sale.  Ask your neighbours to have one too on the same day.  A street sale attracks more people than a single garage sale.

Also, let neighbors know that you are willing to pet-sit if they are away or have a car wash!  There are a bunch of ways to make a few extra bucks.

Another good thing to do is to ask your bank to take evern just $5 per week and automatically put it into a savings account.  Often if we don't feel like we have it in the first place we don't really miss it.  After a year you will have a few hundred to spend on your place.

good luck!

Answer 11

I understand fully where you are coming from...I have some of the same issues.

What I have been doing for some time is socking away money in an escrow account for projects here at home, in the interim I research the lowest cost for what I want to do with getting it done properly as a priority and when I have half again the cost of a project on a list, I immediatly start on it. So far in the last three years, I have built bunk beds for the foster kids, replaced the floor in the bathroom / installed a new shower, put in a new washer and dryer, a new dishwasher, a new floor in my room.

It takes time to build up the additional cash for projects, but you just need to stick with a program of saving and not let these other things that come along dig into your house fund. Every improvement you make adds value to your house. Simply adding new doors to your closet ....at best, a 300 dollar investment...will add at least 1000 to the ouse. I put in a day bed for a total of $90 dollars of lumber and added $2000 dollars to the value of my home. The bamboo tongue and groove flooring I spent $275 on for my room tacked on another $3500.

I have become suprised at how easy it is to save now that I know how much more my house can get if I should decide to sell.

YOU CAN HAVE A NICE HOUSE. I am a foster father. I have a limited budget. The kids have issues that seem to nickel and dime me to death, but I refuse to hit my houses fund. Now even more so. The bunk beds? I built them for $147 dollars in lumber each. They are not bolted to the floor or walls, but the appraiser said if I left them there, they added another $1000 dollars to the value of the house. These things are so solidly built * my own design, too...I am so proud..* it would require a hand grenade to demolish them in place.

Stick to a program of saving. Endure small crices.

You will have the house you want....

Answer 12

do what janas says you wont go wrong with dave ramseys advice i was once broke and everthing that came my way like repairs to cars hit me hard as in 2 months behind on house payment started listing to dave ramsey and dont have them problems any more

Answer 13

You would be suprised what you can find on craigslist...they have a "free" section that you can find leftover home supplies from other people. If you have smaller rooms you can use others leftover paints, tiles, and all kinds of stuff. If that doesn't work sometimes it makes you feel a lot better by just cleaning the whole house really good and decluttering it. cover the cracks in the floor with rugs or furniture

Answer 14

My goodness, it doesn't look that bad! You should be very happy with your home...we all (home owners) wish we could have "more" or "better" but that is just human nature. Many of the problems look as though they could be corrected with very little money...even if you aren't that handy with power tools or wood. I would suggest you take these photos to your local Home Depot or Lowe's and ask them for advice on how to fix the problems without spending a lot. I'm sure they will have several suggestions. For example, your wood floors can be touched-up by lightly sanding the stained areas and then applying several coats of a matching stain. Again..the people at your local home-center can offer helpful solutions that don't cost a lot. It is your home, it looks very nice - even if it is showing its age a bit- so be HAPPY!

Answer 15

Take it one day at a time. You have a very nice home. Why dont you guys take save up some money on the side and take it room by room. That would be the smart thing.

Answer 16

you need to paint the walls a different color.  that blue looks cheap. and take down the red drapery thats over the archway, that looks cheapo too

Answer 17

You might be surprised what you can find in thrift stores, on Craigslist, and in other classified ads. It's not soing to be something you can do all at once...these things usually take time. Unless you've got enought money up front. You can always do a little fix-up yourselves. There is soo much stuff on the web, and so much information on how to fix things on a budget, and how to DIY. But I'll also have to say just be patient, and be thankful for what you have. At least you've got a roof over your head. Good luck!

Answer 18

it doesnt look THAT bad, you could just try to get rid of any extra junk you dont need.

also i noticed a lot of red... red it a very dark colour so maybe you could get rid of as much as you can..just to brighten it ap a little bit :P

open windows and blinds to let any extra light in.. this will make it look more bight and airy.

try picking some flowers from your garden to make your home more pretty and nice smelling.

just clean regularly .. things like that.

good luck

x

Answer 19

you can do easy, cheap fixes, like painting a room or anything. different paint always helps.  by the way dont feel so bad . if you do, just read the newspaper it will make you thankful.

Answer 20

the color is too deep in some of the rooms and some stuff just needs a little eye fixing. unless you really like those colors i would look for some pastels that invite you to have a good mood.

go small one little fix at a time.

for instance u can find out the kind on flooring you have and match it to any freebies that you find on Craig's list

Goodwill always has window dressings that are the wrong size for the person who gave them away

Answer 21

Having a "nice" house won't make you happy or replace the feelings you have of inadeqacies. You have to see beyond your material possessions and instead allow yourself to view the positive aspects of your life which supercede material possessions. If you think your house looks crappy then it'll look crappy to you. Focusing too much on superficial things only distracts you from achieving a true balance in life. I wish you all the best and don't get too hung up on what you don't have, make the best of what you do have.

Answer 22

I really do understand how you feel.  For starters, try not to get so overwhelmed.....just sit back and take one room at a time.  Start with a good coat of paint and do one room, after you've painted, try to put some elbow grease on things and maybe repair the floor or small things that can be repaired.  For those blinds that are broken, put up an inexpensive airy curtain panel, that will make you feel better.  Believe me, little by little, the small things being repaired for starters will begin to make you feel better.....just do what you can, keep the place clean and neat and that's all you can do.  Good luck.