How can I stop my MIL irritating me?

Question

She is staying with us for two months on a visit from Australia and she NEVER SHUTS UP! In the evening I like to read or watch tv...she sees me with a book...or typing or watching a show and she STILL talks to me...I mean..I talk to her in the day and we get on mostly...but why can't she think "Oh..she's engrossed in that book..I won't talk about inane things I will get on with something myself"???? Also, she came back from a weekend awa last night and do you know what the first thing she did was? SHE REORGANISED MY CROCKERY CUPBOARD! Whaaat??? I walked in and looked at her and I said "Are you re-arranging my plates?" and she looked embarrased and laughed and then hugged me in a sort of "Oh aren't I a cheeky fool!" kind of way...I just said "It's ok..I keep it in in a sort of organised chaos and you can't change the habit of a lifetime"...her crockery cupboard is scarily neat...but I have more important things to do than tidy cupboards...would you be angry? Or amused?

Answer 1

Im thinking your a little selfish. She is down for only 2 months, so of course she wants to chat with you all. Geez, my mother in law is a *****, and I will still do the polite thing and talk to her. You having issue is only going to cause a rift with you and your partner. Just be thankful you have a MIL who obviously cares for you both! She will be gone in 2 months, and who knows when you will see her again. Be fair on her, she isnt at home and may feel as uncomfortable as you do

Answer 2

if she did a good job i see no reason to be angry.

Answer 3

I know what you mean, she's only trying to be helpful but she's really irritating you, you'll just have to laugh and grin and bear it.

Why don't you say you're going to bed an hour earlier than you normally would and then read in you're room for an hour to unwind at the end of the night, hopfully this will hepl you cope.

I love my mum to death but if she came to stay with us for two months I know she'd irritate me, haha I'd prob irritate her as well. Everyone has their own ways, you just have to agree to disagree.

Good luck!!

Answer 4

Send your mother in law to my place any day. She sounds fantastic! I would be grateful for the help.

You are winging for insignificant reasons. SO WHAT if she's re-arranging your cutlery draw. It doesn't sound like she's asking you to change your habits, it seems that she just wants to be helpful and useful and appreciated.

Lighten up, be amused - she sounds harmless.  

Answer 5

I can't believe so many people have trouble with their in-laws.  

The thing I love about my husband's family is that they remind me a lot of my family in a lot of ways.  Both of our sides are laid-back, easy to get to know and get along with...all of that.

My MIL is like more of a friend to me than a MIL.  I love it.  She's great...when we lived Idaho near her I loved getting together with her all the time.  I miss that.

Answer 6

Get her to do something for you that would really help like the ironing or send her out for the shopping!

MIL's can be a pain but you can also use them to your advantage!

Think of a job that you've been putting off or don't have time to do and them ask her really nicely if she could help you be dong it.  That way she'll be pleased she helped, you'll be pleased the jobs done and you may find she doesn't irritate you so much!

Answer 7

I think the best thing to do would be to talk to her about it. Just explain that you like to have some time to yourself and i think she would understand. I wouldnt worry about the rearranging of the cupboard it sounds like she is trying to help. But if you dont talk to her about what is bothering you you will just get more and more irritated by little things as time passes. good luck!

Answer 8

I know others say that she's just trying to be helpful by rearranging your stuff but I disagree. My MIL tried doing the same thing even though I keep my stuff neater than she does (things don't fall out of MY cabinets but they fall out of hers!) Anyway when someone does something like that they are really trying to control how you do things....much like she's controlling how you go about your day. I would be angry if I was in your shoes. So I'd tell her not to mess with the cabinets (or anything else she's trying to "fix" for you) and as far as the tv watching/ book reading I would just say "Oh I'm so glad I finally am home and have time to read my book (or watch this show) without interruptions....I've looked forward to it all day!" Maybe then she'll get the hint!

Good luck though b/c those super "nice" overbearing MIL"s are a real pain in the butt!