How can I stop people from yelling & screaming @ me & bossing me around, trying to control me all the time?

Question

Even though I'm 24, with a college degree, people yell @ me all the time because they think I'm dumb because of my disability. & it's very humiliating, ESPECIALLY when my family does it to me in public. & it makes me nervous & makes my anxiety worse. I suffer PTSD, & just for me to be yelled @ or for me to hear a loud noise is traumatic for me. Sometimes I get yelled @ for NO reason.

EX: I might say, "Hey Tasha, do you need help carrying in the groceries ?"

Her explosive response, "WHAT THE P***k DOES IT MATTER TO YOU!? WHAT YOU NEED TO DO IS SIT YOUR @$$ DOWN & SHUT UP!", & then, everyone around cracks up laughing.

Trip part is, Tasha is younger than me, she's 18. I'm 24. Why do I get treated like this if I'm nothing but kind, helpful & friendly to people?

Answer 1

well you might be too nice soo nice you let others control you!

I know i use to be that way and my mom still is!

i use to be the younger girl yelling at here when she said good morning can i get you some coffee!  i would bit her head off!

but she let me do it over and over so it became habit forming to treat my mom like c**p!  then when she finally got balls to stand up for her self i stopped!  not sure if i was doing this to help her or to get my way  maybe a bit of both!  

see i use to let others walk on me yell at me and i listened!  i never argued or spoke up.. well some times but sometimes is well forgotton!

if you don't want them to yell at you then stand up everytime they yell say something controlling i would ask them if they felt better and then do what I wanted to do!

or i would yell back!  stop yelling at me or i'll start to return the favor!  do you want me to be mean?

Shut up!  

i mean random thigns to show that i wasn't having it!

if this has been going on for a while!  remember habits are hard to break they will not accept it for a while and even make it harder for you to stand up for yourself but once you get throught that "test" they will start to leave you alone in that department!

Answer 2

you can try standing up for yourself once in awhile

Answer 3

People that act like that are useless and are less mature than a 10-year old. You're not dumb at all especially since I can't find any spelling errors or grammatical errors. I'll have to give those mean people in your family a true attitude adjustment If I was present. Stand up to them and tell them to mind their own business.

Answer 4

Wow, sounds like a bad situation all around.

move away... far far away....

Answer 5

Let her know how much she hurt you by saying that. She should know better than to say something like that to you. Also speak with others who treat you that way.. to let them know how you feel when they do that. I would not hang around people who don't "get it" and understand how you feel.

Don't go out as much with your family if it triggers anything. Tell them politely after they do something that it bothers you rather than allowing the negative behavior to continue. Perhaps they don't know what they are doing is rude.

Answer 6

It sounds like your family is insensitive and actually gets a kick out of torturing the family member with the disability.  It sounds cruel.  Maybe it is time to move out of your home.  Get a dog to make yourself feel less lonely.  Dogs love you no matter what.