How can I stop sounding like a bossy mum?

Question

I am a fun mother ( I think). I spend a lot of time with my 4 year old daughter and we do have a lot of fun. However, how do you be directive without sounding bossy? Anything from showing her how to say her ABCs correctly to telling her to stop when crossing the road, it just seems like I spend a great majority of the day saying 'do this, don't do that'. What do you suggest? Thankyou.

Answer 1

Maybe in stead of saying NO! dont CROSS THE ROAD!! u could say how about we cross the road together holding mommys hand? idk if uve heard of the stoy of the little grl noin the 911 song to help save her mom but y not make up some fun songs to make learning the basics to life easier. like crossing the road. Look left, look right, grasp mommys hand and walk away. something like that[i no not good but its an example] Good luck! and i hope i helped!

Answer 2

tell her a reason to not do that, like don't rip that because it's not right and it's not ment to be ripped and don't say don't or do this directly, say ok,remember it's important to do..such and such

Answer 3

As a preschool teacher, and a parent of three girls. I would suggest you take a step back and really look at your interactions with your daughter. Are you leading the way? From your description it sounds like you are, so you may think you are having lots of fun...but from your daughter's point of view it may not be so. The things you really need to stress about are the safety issues......it's fine to have a really strong NO! STOP! if she is trying to cross the road before traffic has passed or stopped, but if it's something minor like the ABC song....I wouldn't correct her. Not to mention...as a teacher, it means absolutely ZERO to me that a four year old can say the ABC's correctly. It has no educational correlation whatsoever.

Let her take the lead on more interactions, don't worry if everything isn't perfect, just enjoy spending time with her. Save the stress for the serious things, the safety issues and the things that are not negotiable. At the same time, I most definitely sound bossy sometimes.....I'm the one in charge and I have to maintain order.

Answer 4

use the word NO less.  pick your fights cuz you'll have far worse ones in the future.

Answer 5

ask nicely

Answer 6

as a mother i understand you have the bossy sound to your voice.  i think it is a good thing but only sometimes, make the abc's a fun game like ask daughter to say it insteed of telling her, give her the when and then when you clean up then you can have the candy that kind of thing and listen to what she has to say before you say anything. do not just yell at her let her tell you what she did and explain why it was wrong.  last alway catch her doing something good then congratulate her do not make her think you only see the bad things she does that way when you do get bossy or yell she will know she did something. it will teach her to take controll of the things she does, and let her know you love her i hope you like this answer.

Answer 7

Try and not use "Don't" I know its a really strong word but it sounds a little mean. Try to explain to her the reasons why she cannot do a certain thing or why we need to stop at the road etc. I have to do this with my nephew as he is very sensitive to a lot of things and if you say "Don't" he gets really upset and thinks he is in trouble.